Love the Lost

Living

Living

Eric coughed hard as P listened to his lungs. He'd been coughing for three days. Getting over this cold would be hard for him.

"Twenty-five degrees." She grumbled. "You're lucky you haven't developed pneumonia, you know that? I raised you smarter than this."

"Sorry." Eric fell back on his pillow. "I was getting stir crazy."

"If only we could move to a warmer state." Peter chimed in. "But somebody has gotten into trouble in every single one of them."

Eric shrugged. "Life's an adventure."

"Enough talk." Haley bounded in, carrying a tray of grilled cheese and tomato soup. "Eric needs to eat. Please leave."

Haley was taking every advantage of Eric's illness. She would hardly let anyone see him and became his own personal nurse maid.

"Temp at one zero two." P shook her head. "Eat and then sleep." She and Peter began their exit from the room. "Evan, may I speak with you?"

Remus followed P to her room. She closed then locked the door. "Let's talk." She sat on her bed. "Sit."

Remus was unsure whether or not she was angry. Her body was tense, but her voice was calm. Remus sat next to her. She hugged him tightly.

"How have you been feeling?" She pulled away. "I've been worried since I found that letter."

"I'm fine." Remus shrugged. "Still trying to get used to the fact that I lost four months."

"You're lucky it was only four." P sighed. "Honestly, I didn't think you'd ever wake up. You really should've gone to a hospital."

"Why didn't I?" Remus was curious. P wasn't the kind to wait. She would always jump the gun on hospital trips. Eric always complained about it.

"Eric's heart rate would go through the roof, every time I'd suggest it." P sighed. "Honestly, I thought you were going to die. There was so much blood and then we had to wrap you in a blanket and secretly carry you to the car. I'm surprised the cops didn't see Eric carrying you into the house."

"Blanket?" Remus raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah." P blushed. "We didn't want the cops to see us basically kidnapping you, so I wrapped you in a blanket and the boys carried you out." P closed her eyes. "Eric stayed with you the whole ride. You almost didn't make it." She shook her head then grabbed Remus's shoulders. "Then I found that note. I thought that you'd never wake up. You were so ready to die. I didn't want you to die. You, Eric, and Haley are like my children. I love all of you. If you would've died, it would've been my fault for not taking you to the hospital. But I couldn't risk Eric's heart, or Peter and I getting arrested for some type of kidnapping."

Remus hugged P. "I promise, I'll never leave you." He truly loved P like a mother. She took care of him like he was her son. They always talked about everything. "I love you, P."

"You're a great kid, Remus." P smiled. "So, how's your heart been feeling? And has that inhaler been helping?"

"Yes." Remus nodded. "I use it, like, twice a day. I never expected it to work so well."

"Looks like you've been needing one for a while." P said. "Your parents didn't take very good care of you."

"Just enough to keep me alive for grandma." Remus shrugged. "But she doesn't care anymore. You won't have to worry about them calling the cops; they really don't care. They'll be happy with me gone. How have things been?"

"Hard." P sighed. "At Little Eric's last doctor's visit...we found that he has the same heart condition as Eric."

"What?" Remus's mouth gaped open. "Is he...okay?"

"Yes, he's fine." P reassured him. "He just needs medication."

"Medication?! He's one!" Remus was angry. "He'll get addicted! He'll get sick! He'll...he'll..." Remus closed his eyes. "He'll turn into us."

"No!" P screamed. "Don't you ever say that again! That baby will never become an addict! I won't fail him too!" Tears formed in her eyes. "I won't fail him."

"P...don't cry." Remus held her. "You haven't failed anyone. If anything, we've failed you."

"You're just kids." P messed with Remus's hair. "I'm supposed to take care of you guys."

"You can't do it all your own." Remus shook his head. "But I'll help ya. You don't gotta worry about buying me food or nothing. I got my own money."

"Remus, I'm in charge of you now. Which means that I'm going to cook you food and do everything a guardian should..." P smiled. "I'll show you what a good life is. You won't need drugs anymore."

Remus nodded, but inside he knew the truth. Nothing could ever make him stop using drugs. Life was just too hard for him to face sober.

*

He was meeting them by himself. D, Luke, and Kevin would request his medication and he would deliver. He wasn't scared of meeting them alone. None of them seemed violent, but they were very open about their opinions on things.

Gays were disgusting. Women were just something to have s*x with. Remus didn't agree with anything they said.

But hanging with them made it easier to understand Eric. It was no wonder that he treated Haley so poorly.

Does everyone think like this?

He would never treat anyone the way they treat people. Depression is horrible; he wouldn't want to make anyone else worse.

"So when Eric getting back?" Kevin asked. "It's been six days."

"He had to fix a contract." Remus lied. "He'll be back in a couple days." Eric had told him not to tell them the truth. He said to not show weakness. Remus wouldn't endanger Eric.

"s**t's going down." D bumped Remus's shoulder. Remus looked at where D was indicating. A group of teenagers were gathering a few yards away. They were talking in angered voices.

"Let's bounce." Luke grabbed his brother's shoulder.

"We could go to my place," D suggested. "pop Evan's shit."

Remus was nervous. He never got high without Eric. Eric protected him.

"Sure." Remus reluctantly agreed. I really don't want to do this without Eric, but I can't piss off our new partners already.

*

D's house was a true mess. Needles were scattered across the floor. Papers and trash were crumpled on the ground.

Remus immediately felt uneasy. Pills were one thing, but needles were another and D was already getting fresh ones from his bag.

"Who wants a hit?" D asked.

Luke nodded and reached for the needle. He then turned to Kevin and pushed him back. "Get outta here kid." He ordered. "Take Evan with ya."

"Ah, come on bro!" Kevin protested. "Just let me try it!"

Luke shoved Kevin into the door. "Get the f**k out!" He shouted. "And don't ask me that again."

Kevin grabbed Remus and pulled him outside. He sat on the back porch and got out a pack of cigarettes. "You want one?" He offered the pack to Remus.

"Nah." Remus shook his head and hand. "I don't smoke."

"For a dealer, you're pretty tame." Kevin took a long drag. "Still, not a bad drug of choice. How you get those pills anyway?"

"Uh...just a good connection." Remus lied. "Not really supposed to mention him." Remus watched Kevin nod.

The blue in his hair seemed to glow with the light of the moon. His face looked soft and perfect. His lips held the cigarette with perfect gentleness. Remus felt his blood beginning to rush to the lower part of his body.

"You okay?" Kevin sounded confused.

"Yeah uh...I was just wondering." Remus rubbed the back of his neck. "Why did your brother shove us out like that?"

"Oh, he's gonna do heroin." Kevin shrugged. "He won't let me do it." He sighed then took another cigarette out.

"Why'd he bring ya here then?" Remus asked. "And me?"

"Our parents are real abusive and he doesn't want them to hurt me, so he brings me everywhere he goes." Kevin explained. "But he doesn't like me seeing him do heroin 'cause he doesn't want me to do it. And he made you come because I get bored when he does it." Kevin coughed a bit. "Why didn't you go home? You didn't really have to come."

"I'd do anything for a high." Remus chuckled.

"You don't do hard stuff, though?" Kevin asked. "Your arms are pretty clean and you don't look much like a zombie."

"Eric don't want me to..." Remus stopped. "Never mind."

"Eric controls you?" Kevin quizzed.

"No, nothing like that." Remus defended his friend. "Eric saved my life. He taught me everything I know. Look, I'm not supposed to tell anyone, so judge me if you will, but my heart's all messed up and I've got asthma. He doesn't want anything to hurt me. We're friends."

Kevin stared at Remus for a while.

Fuck, what's wrong with me? I'm not supposed to admit weakness. Eric isn't here to protect me. I'm f****d. I'm f****d. Eric, I'm sorry.

"I won't say nothing, okay?" Kevin formed a gentle smile. The kind that caused butterflies to form in Remus's stomach. "Don't let Luke know I told you, but I have seizures. My parents caused them when they....beat me..."

Remus saw himself in Kevin. A young boy, full of hurt and pain. He was beautiful, however; not like how Remus saw himself.

He wasn't beautiful like the way Eric was beautiful. Kevin wasn't muscular. His eyes weren't spectacularly different. He didn't seem mysterious and was severely pale. Yet Remus saw him as a beautiful boy.

His lips formed a bow. His hair looked as soft as his skin. At first glance, he could be mistaken for a girl. He wasn't cocky and didn't act tough. Kevin was being real with Remus and Remus loved it.

"I'm sorry." Remus said. "My parents used to beat me until I left."

"They just let ya leave?" Kevin was intrigued. "You're only what, fifteen? You run away?"

"No, they got paid off with drugs. I still have to stand in front of their house for the bus but I don't see them anymore." Remus answered. "And fifteen? Nah, I'm thirteen."

"Me too!" Kevin was excited. "I thought you were older. Eric thirteen too?"

"Yeah." Remus smiled. "But he's wicked smart."

"Good dealer." Kevin agreed. "So, wanna go inside? They'd be done injecting by now, and I kinda like to keep an eye on Luke."

"Alright." Remus followed Kevin inside. D was passed out, on his side, against a wall. Luke sat in a chair, eyes barely open.

"Hey...little...brother." His words were slow. "I...love you."

"Love ya too." Kevin nodded. "Have a good nap."

"That didn't take long." Remus whispered. "How do they enjoy it?"

"Not sure Luke does." Kevin whispered. “He pushes himself to the point of overdosing..." Kevin closed his eyes and sighed. "That's why I watch him. He says it's to help him sleep."

"That's a waste." Remus said.

Kevin grabbed the syringe. "Wanna try?" He held it out to Remus.

"Nah." Remus refused. "Eric would have a cow. If you do it then you should get a fresh needle."

"If I did it, Luke would kill me." Kevin put the syringe down. "What time you gotta get back?"

"Huh?" Remus asked.

"Your guardian." Kevin finished. "Won't they be expecting you? It's almost five."

"Shit." Remus rushed toward the door. "P is gonna kill me. I'll see ya'll in a bit."

"Bye!" Kevin shouted as Remus shut the door.

Please be asleep. Please be asleep. Please don't kill me.

*

P woke up a mere five minutes after Remus got home. He quickly hopped in the shower and cleaned off the remnants of the outside.

He sat in the shower for about three hours. He thought of Kevin. Kevin didn't look thirteen. He looked and acted older.

Seizures.

"It could cause his death." Marie seemed to read his mind. "They could cause him to choke on his vomit."

"And what?" Remus asked. "What should I do if that happens?"

"I don't know." Marie said. "Run?"

"I couldn't just run." Remus rolled his eyes. "Marie, why are you in the bathroom?" This is kind of a private action."

"Well, I'm just saying." Marie growled. "It was pretty obvious that you were crushing on him."

"Marie, get out!" Remus shouted.

"Evan, you okay?" P knocked on the door.

"Yeah!" Remus answered. "I'll be out in a minute."

Remus turned off the shower. He quickly dried off and got dressed. He met P in the kitchen.

She flipped a pancake then poked at some eggs. "Hey, you okay?" Her smile faded. "You look exhausted."

"Couldn't sleep." Remus shrugged.

"P probably knows what to do." Marie whispered in his ear. "Ask her for advice."

Marie was acting peculiar. She usually didn't force him into things, nor did she read his thoughts. Only sometimes would she know what he was thinking; she was only able to do the act by possessing his body. Yet, he didn't remember being possessed.

"Fine." Remus mumbled. "Hey, P, can I ask ya something?"

"Anything." P ruffled his hair a bit.

"If someone's having a seizure, what do you do?" Remus asked her.

P stopped cooking. "Peter, please finish making breakfast." She handed him the spatula. "Evan and I are going to the bedroom."

Remus followed P to her room. She had him sit on the floor. "So, why do you ask?"

"I was just curious." Remus shrugged. "I think it'd probably be best if I learned...you know, just in case."

"Alright." P smiled. "I'll teach ya everything you need to know. I've been meaning to have you learn. Medical knowledge is the best thing to learn."

"Okay so, seizure?" Remus pressed. He really did want to learn. Ever since his coma, he'd been pondering learning medical training. He'd watched Eric perform CPR on him numerous times. Eric did it effortlessly and as though it was second nature. Remus wanted to be like him.

"With seizures, you simply have to place them on their side so that they don't drown on their vomit." P explained. "Then try to keep them from hurting themselves, and call for help."

"What if they stop breathing?" Remus asked.

"They usually don't breathe normally during one, but they shouldn't really stop." P dragged a CPR dummy out from under her bed. "However, if the seizure has stopped and they aren't breathing then first check for their pulse by placing your index and middle finger on either their wrist or neck, like this. If they have a pulse then begin rescue breathing by using your fingers to gently lift the chin." P showed him with the dummy. "Tilt back the head to open the airway, pinch the nose then give one breath every five seconds. Make sure their chest rises or you'll have to re-position the head." P breathed into the doll. "Do that until they breathe or help arrives. Check pulse every two minutes."

"What if their heart isn't beating?" Remus asked.

"Simple, do the breathing and then place one hand on top of the other, place the heal of your hand on the lower half of the sternum in the center. Keep your arms straight with your shoulders over the chest. Press down two inches. Press thirty times then give two breaths. Check for the chest to rise during the breaths. It's easy, Remy." P backed away from the dummy. "Okay, you're turn."

Remus practiced to exhaustion. He wanted to be perfect. He wanted to be like Eric.

"That's enough." P patted his back. "You're fine. A real pro. Anytime you wanna practice more, just let me know."

*

Haley sat on top of Eric. She held a fistful of his shirt while slipping her tongue into his mouth. She moaned as he bit her lip.

Remus tried not to stare, but he couldn't help it. Remus envied Haley. He wanted to be her. He wanted to kiss Eric and to be kissed that way. His feelings for Eric were only growing worse.

"Stop it!" Peter shook his head. "We don't need any more kids in this damn house." He went to his room and slammed the door.

"What's wrong with him?" Haley huffed. "It ain't my fault P doesn't give him anything."

"Oh shut up." Eric threw Haley to the ground. "That's disgusting to think about." Eric grabbed his bag then Remus's shirt. "Come on."

Eric locked himself and Remus in his bedroom. "Boy, she drives me insane. All she wants is to f**k. She foolishly thinks that she's in love, but I know that she doesn't really love me. She wants to control me. I just feel like she uses me. Then again, I use her. There's something off about her, Evan. She's not right in the head. I don't know if it's fetal alcohol syndrome, the pills, or what but there's just something off about her. She's border line psychopathic. Trust me man, you don't want a woman like that."

Remus wasn't sure what to say. Eric's erection was slightly showing and looked inviting. Remus's heart began to pound. He felt light-headed.

"Anyway, how's the new gang?" Eric sat up. "They believe the story?"

"Yeah." Remus nodded. "You know D and Luke do heroin? That's new to our usual group."

"What?" Eric grabbed Remus's arm. "Did they make you do it? Show me?"

Remus pulled his arm away. "I ain't that dumb."

"Good." Eric slightly smiled. "Don't let them pressure you. I should be able to join ya soon. My fever's almost completely gone."

"Don't push yourself." Remus insisted. "Luke won't let Kevin or I near the stuff. You don't gotta worry."

"He's a good guy." Eric nodded. "Wanna get high?"

"You bet." Remus pulled his pills out.

*

Eric handed Remus a half a bottle of pills. Remus stuffed it in his pocket.

"No less than three hundred." Eric instructed. "Tell the guys I'll see them in three days. My fever should be gone by then."

"Okay." Remus began to leave, but Eric grabbed his hand.

"Don't let them talk you into heroin." He warned. "I swear to god, I will kill you if you put a needle anywhere near your skin."

Remus pulled his arm away. "I know." He smiled. "I won't."

*

Kevin was waiting a couple of blocks away. He handed Remus the money and Remus gave him the pills. They stared at each other for a while, eyes locked; then they started laughing.

Remus couldn't stay serious with Kevin. All he could see was the sexy boy smoking beside him. They were slowly becoming good friends.

"And fail." Luke came out from the shadows. "How do you expect to sell like that?"

"We were just having some fun." Kevin chuckled. "I think we were too serious. It'll look bad if the cops ever watch us."

"You'll never be at the top." D huffed. "Come, kids, let's make more of that." He pointed to the money in Remus's hand.

"Kids." Kevin rolled his eyes. "Will I ever be a man to you?"

"Nah." Luke ruffled his hair. "You'll always be my kid brother."

Kevin and Remus followed Luke and D. Kevin was finishing off his second cigarette. He slowly exhaled.

"So, how's Eric?" D asked. "It's been two weeks."

"He'll be back in three days." Remus answered.

"I think he ditched." D's voice was cold. "I don't take kindly to people backing out. My deals are permanent."

"He didn't back out." Remus defended Eric. "The past partner was trying to f**k us over."

D glared at Remus. "He better not be backing out."

Kevin elbowed Remus in the ribs. He gave him a weird look.

"Don't mouth off to D." He whispered. "He will kill you."

Remus shrugged. D didn't scare him. He was just some punk addict.

"So, who we selling the pills to?" Remus asked.

"Anyone that shows up." Luke answered. "You're ready for the spot."

"You are, but watch out for homos." D spat. "Girls trading their bodies is right, but not those homos. They'll try to force themselves on you."

Remus felt his cheeks grow hot. He'd like it; he would. If the boys looked anything like Eric or Kevin, then Remus might actually give into their offers.

But he hated the word homo. It was a foul word to Remus's ears. It made him feel even less like a person. He would never be free from that word, from those thoughts; he was a freak.

"Oh." Remus muttered. "What do I do if they offer? Just say no?"

"Nah." D tossed a pocket knife to Remus. "Stab the fuckers."

*

"Stab them?" Eric was putting his third jacket on. "That's insane. Don't listen to D. We're pill pushers, not murderers."

"I don't know how I feel about D." Remus whispered, afraid to anger Eric. "Luke and Kevin are cool, but D is a bit on the crazy side."

"Too bad." Eric scoffed. "Luke and D roll together." He pulled on some boots. "Ready to go?"

The door swung open. Haley stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips. "Where are you off to?"

"Meeting." Eric answered.

"Can I come?" Haley asked.

"Guys only." Eric was short with her.

"What if I go tell P?" Haley said in a smart-mouthed way.

Eric glared at her. Remus watched him grind his teeth.

"Aiming for another punch?" Eric was in front of Haley. His hands formed fists at his sides. "You need to learn to keep your mouth shut."

"Eric." Haley began to tremble.

Remus slowly approached his friends. He gently grabbed Eric's shoulder.

"She won't tell." He whispered. "Don't hit her."

Eric shrugged Remus's hand off. "Let's go." He pushed passed Haley. He opened the front door then looked at Haley. "Tell P, and you won't like me."

He walked out. Remus raced after him. Eric closed his eyes and sighed.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I don't like acting like that. I...I don't even know why I do it." Eric held sorrow and anger in his eyes. "P raised me better. She never hit me. Yet, I hit Haley. I turn into this monster and no matter how many pills I take, that doesn't change. I don't know what's wrong with me."

Your sister wouldn't hit you, but she would take some of your beatings.

Remus saw that evidence only once. She normally wore shirts that completely covered her shoulders and back. She never wore a tank top or anything less than a longer-sleeved t-shirt. Until one day, when the air was hot and humid. She was checking Remus's lungs and had taken off her shirt, to reveal a tank underneath.

It was then that Remus saw her largest scar. It was on her left shoulder and went down her back. There were smaller scratches surrounding it, but that one was the largest and most distinct. It seemed to be the result of a belt, but Remus wasn't sure.

Remus had asked her about it. At the time, he didn't think that it was rude. She just smiled and told him everything. Her smile was a sad one, but she had a simple explanation. "If I can spare my brother any pain, then I will." She had said.

"It's alright." Remus tried to comfort his friend. "You don't mean it. I'll help you, if you want? I'll stop you whenever you go to hit her."

Eric looked at Remus. A small smile formed. "Yeah?" Eric nodded and then began to laugh. "It'd probably kill you! You're a twig!"

"Gee thanks." Remus shoved his hands into his pockets. "I'll remember that."

Eric slapped him on the back. "I'm just kidding with ya. I wouldn't put all P's hard work to waste." His chuckling stopped. "Seriously though, I appreciate it, Evan. I really could use the help."

"I'll get stronger." Remus stated. "I will."

"Sure ya will, buddy." Eric laughed. "Sure ya will."

They weren't going to a drug meeting. Luke and D weren't even coming. Kevin wanted to go to a movie.

Remus felt that it was important to have some normalcy in his life. He'd only ever known pain and drugs. Now, he had the chance to have real fun.

"Hey guys." Kevin smiled. "Ready for the movie?"

"Yeah." Remus answered.

"Cool." Kevin nodded. "Eric, how'd your negotiations go?"

"Well." Eric answered. "We still cool?"

"We're fine." Kevin answered. "But you may wanna talk to D. He's been...sketchy."

"I know, Evan told me." Eric stated. "We'll meet them after the movie."

*

Remus sat quietly in the dark. He couldn't quite concentrate. The movie was good but the ghost walking the aisles was distracting.

He was wearing an old theater vest and hat. Blood poured down his face from a bullet hole in his forehead. He couldn't see Remus watching him; he couldn't see any of them.

He was repeating the past. He would make motions as though he was sweeping. He would go toward the front and then freeze. "No please!" He'd cry then beg on his knees. "I'll have the money on Friday! Please no!" It was then that the man would lurch backward. He would rise and start the scene all over.

Remus tried to ignore him but his screams always pulled Remus back to the scene. He only saw bits and pieces of the movie. Sad, because Kevin and Eric kept laughing.

"f**k it." Remus muttered and got out his pills. He'd wanted to watch the movie sober. He wanted to be normal.

I'll never be normal.

*

Remus was leaning on Kevin as they left the theater. Nothing was clear anymore. Time was slowing and people were blurring by. He'd taken maybe ten pills and was feeling perfect.

Eric was trying to help Kevin by holding onto Remus's arm. People were staring and muttering but Remus couldn't make out what they were saying.

"I've never seen him like this." Kevin whispered to Eric. "I don't know if you can hear it, but his breathing is wheezy."

"He's alright." Eric sounded nervous. "We just gotta get him away from prying eyes."

Eric and Kevin practically dragged Remus to an alley. They carefully sat him down and Eric got out his phone.

"What are you doing?" Kevin asked.

Eric stared at the clock on his phone and placed two fingers on Remus's neck.

Remus could feel his heart pounding but it didn't seem to be in distress. His chest wasn't hurting, not that he could really feel it. He knew that his heart was fine. But he could feel a slight burning in his chest, which he imagined would've felt worse if it weren't for the pills.

I'm definitely in trouble.

Eric sighed. "Damn it." He muttered then glared at Kevin. "Don't tell D or your brother." Eric retrieved an inhaler from his back pocket. "Betray us and I'll kill you."

Remus breathed in the inhaler. He'd felt his lungs relaxing. His mind was still foggy so he couldn't really tell how well he was.

"Good?" Eric stared into Remus's eyes.

Remus nodded and slowly stood up. "We going to see the guys?" He stumbled but was caught by Eric.

"Depends on you." Eric studied him. "Can you walk?"

"Yeah." Remus nodded. "We gotta do it. Otherwise, who knows what D will do."

Eric sighed then agreed. "Kevin, you help Evan."

*

"Are you sure you're okay?" Kevin asked. Remus and Kevin sat outside while Eric was inside talking with D.

"Yeah." Remus answered. "Told ya, asthma."

"Does that happen a lot?" Kevin asked. "Last few times you were fine."

"I think I might have anxiety or something." Remus exposed his inner thoughts. "Whenever I see them, I get shaky and can't breathe normally."

"See who?" Kevin asked.

Shit. Remus had slipped. He didn't tell anyone about what he saw, not even P. What sane person would believe me?

"Nothing." Remus closed his eyes. "Just...sometimes I have hallucinations when I get high. They freak me out. Don't tell Eric."

"There's a lot of things we can't tell each other, huh?" Kevin whispered. "Luke is always telling me that people can't be trusted, especially people in this line of work." Kevin looked sad. "I know things will never change. The world is tough and will only get tougher. But we're kids, right? Is it so wrong to show a bit of human?"

Remus pondered Kevin's words while he stared at him. Is it wrong? Eric had drilled the fact that the world was unsafe into him. He'd made sure that Remus knew that he couldn't let anyone know about his illness, or about Eric's. They'd be taken advantage of.

"No." Remus answered. "Honestly, if you weren't with D or didn't have Luke, Eric would probably ask you to join us."

"Join you?" Kevin's interest peaked.

"Yeah..." Remus looked at the house. He was afraid that Eric would kill him if he heard Remus spilling out their secrets. "look, Eric saved my life by letting me live with him and his sister. They treat me real good."

"You live with Eric's sister?" Kevin asked. "What...what's that like?"

"Well, it's Eric, Eric's girlfriend, his sister, his sister's boyfriend, and his sister's two kids." Remus explained. "His sister's a nurse's assistant at a hospital. She...she's helped me out a lot."

"How nice are they?" Kevin had his eyes closed. "Do they make dinner? Play board games? Laugh?"

"Of course." Remus leaned against the stairs. "It's like a real family."

"Eric's lucky." Kevin shook his head but then he smiled and grabbed Remus's shoulders. "You said that I could come?"

"Maybe." Remus shrugged. "Eric's sister usually accepts the less fortunate. She's like a mom."

"Would she take us?" Kevin was semi-excited. "Would they let Luke and I live there? Please?"

Remus pitied Kevin. He was a sweet kid. With the right situations, he could go far. Kevin could have a fruitful life.

He wanted to help Kevin but there wasn't a lot he could do. It would be hard to convince P to take in two more kids.

"I'll talk with the family about it." Remus nodded. "I uh...I kinda gotta explain why it'd be better if you lived with us. So uh...I kinda need to know about your family life."

Kevin's smile faded. He sighed then searched his pockets for his cigarettes. He lit one and breathed deeply. "They're abusive." He grumbled. "They don't do drugs but they drink a lot. They hit first and ask questions later. Luke usually just gets us a hotel or we crash at D's."

Sorrow filled Kevin's eyes. He was just like Remus, longing for a place to belong.

"Luke makes me go to school." Kevin continued. "He wants me to succeed."

"I'll tell P." Remus whispered. "That's Eric's sister."

Kevin attacked Remus with a hug. "Thank you." He whispered and then backed away and coughed. "So uh...they've been in there a long time."

"Yeah." Remus tried to conceal his happiness. "Think everything's okay?"

"Should we check?" Kevin stood.

"Probably." Remus nodded.

They walked into the house. Eric and D sat on the floor, passing a bottle of vodka back and forth. Luke lay passed out on the floor, snoring loudly.

"Hey." Eric smiled. "Join us!" He held the bottle out to them.

Kevin took the bottle and swung it back. "Ah." He chuckled and then held the bottle out to Remus. "Eighty proof." He bore a devilish grin. "Take it."

Remus took the bottle and stared at it. He'd never drunk before.

"Scared p***y?" D grinned. He looked upon Remus with such contempt, somewhat reminding Remus of his father.

"Of course not." Remus held the bottle to his lips. "Here goes."

"That alcohol sure did burn. I was only thirteen when I had my first drink. The feeling was almost as good as being high. Eric, Kevin, and I were slowly turning into a trio. Kevin was much easier to talk to. I would've gladly told him everything about myself. He was a wonderful friend."