The Beta’s Alpha Mate

Four

Julien’s POV

I stood in the shower as the steaming hot water poured down on me, pressing my head against the tile wall.

What the f**k. What the actual f**k. What the f**k.

Yeah, you keep saying that, my wolf growled

Can you shut up? I snapped back.

My heart raced as I tried to take deep breaths, calm myself down, not panic.

I wanted to mindlink Kade or Grayson, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I deserved the torment.

“f**k!” I yelled, to no one in particular, punching the shower wall. Blood dripped down the white tile, my hand aching. Definitely broken. Of course. It’s fine, I deserved it.

Finally turning off the shower, I dried off and put on boxers before turning the lights off in the bedroom and climbing into bed. I pulled the blankets over my head, continuing to scream curse words in my head.

This night had not gone how I planned. I thought it would be different, that I’d spend tonight in bed with my mate, and take her home with me tomorrow, and introduce her as my Luna, and we’d have pups, and-

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted when I felt a stabbing pain in my lower stomach. My vision blurred at the intensity of the pain. I let out a whimper, trying to steel myself against it.

Mate’s with someone else, Juno whined.

He was right. This was how everyone described mate bond pain, when your mate was unfaithful. But it was my fault. I might not know anything else right now, but I knew I deserved this. I closed my eyes and curled into a ball as the next wave of pain hit. f**k.

* * * * *

“Yo, Juls!” Kade pounded on my door as he yelled my name. “Let’s go, breakfast time and then we’re leaving, Alpha! You can bring the Luna, but let’s go!”

I yawned and rubbed my eyes, processing Kade’s words. The events of last night came rushing back and I contemplated forfeiting my title and becoming a rogue to avoid ever seeing another werewolf.

With a sigh, I packed my bag and l left it by the door for the omegas to take to the car while we eat.

“Morning, Juls,” Helix said as I approached the same table we had dinner at last night. There were several new additions, and I fixed my expression to a friendly smile as I greeted them.

“Well, well, well! Moon Goddess had a busy night, I see!” I joked.

“This is Olivia, my soon to be Luna,” Helix said proudly, gesturing to a blonde. Sierra and Marcos were seated across from them and all four were sporting new marks.

“Damn, Moonstone pack doesn’t waste any time!” I teased. The girls giggled in response, and Helix and Marcos pulled them closer.

Kade wrapped his arm around a woman with a warrior physique. “This is Brea, your future Gamma female, Alpha.” He looked so pleased with himself even though they were not yet marked.

Grayson gestured to a pale, blonde man next to him. “And this is Bennett. He’s a warrior at Shadow Moon.” He kissed Bennett on the cheek.

I raised my eyebrow. “So we have a new Beta, too?”

“No,” Kade chimed in. “Grays met his mate last night and his mate turned out to be a piece of trash, but luckily, Brea introduced him to her cousin Bennett.”

I growled. “What do you mean?”

Helix shook his head. “It was the lowest possible thing for a mate to do. He ran off, and Grayson followed, and then they encountered a huge group of rogues, and he left Grayson to fight them off alone.”

“What?!” I exclaimed. “That’s not wha- Grayson, are you okay?”

“I mean, I’m here now, so, yeah, right?” He shrugged. “Luckily Kade got my mindlink and he and Brea got Helix and Olivia, and the four of them swooped in like superheroes before I died or got my ass kicked too badly.”

“f**k, I’m sorry that happened, man,” I told him genuinely. “I had no idea.”

“Yeah speaking of, where were you? I mindlinked you, too, but you had your block up!” Grayson said.

“Too busy with our future Luna?” Kade grinned as he thrust his hips in the air.

“Asshole, don’t talk about my Luna like that,” I growled him, half joking. “But no, sadly, I didn’t find her. You all ran off so quick after we shifted, I didn’t have anyone to run with, so I just went to bed. I must’ve been sleeping really soundly.”

“Uh, yeah you must have. I was literally screaming for help,” Grayson snorted. “d**k. No one would want to be your Beta if I died because you were taking too deep of a nap.”

“I mean technically you would’ve died because your mate is a horrible person,” Helix chimed in. “If you ever find out who he is, I hope you reject him on sight. What a coward.”

“Oh trust me,” Grayson laughed. “That asshole has another thing coming if he thinks he can literally leave me to the wolves and then get to enjoy the immense satisfaction of sharing a bed with me.”

“Who needs that shitty man when you can have me?” Bennett kissed Grayson right on his marking spot, pretending he was about to bite him.

We all laughed, and Grayson and Bennett kissed again, this time on the lips, with lots of tongue, and soon Bennett was on Grayson’s lap with his legs wrapped around his waist.

“We’ve still got a few minutes, babe, let’s make the most of our guest suite,” Grayson nipped Bennett’s ear as he stood up with the warrior still in his arms. He winked at us before they headed to their floor.

“Well, I gotta go check one thing before we leave, I’ll see you guys at home since I drove separate. Helix, Marcos, Sierra, Olivia — safe travels, see you all soon,” I said hurriedly. They all waved goodbye, and I raced back up to my guest room.

Shutting and locking the door, I leaned against the wall and slide down until I was sitting on the floor, making it just in time. My arms clasped around my sides, as I bit back a scream from the pain.

We deserve it. I told you to stop running and go to mate, Juno growled at me.

I didn’t smell any rogues. I would never have left him with rogues, I argued.

I tried to tell you. You were too busy whining about how you ‘didn’t understand’ to pay attention. You shut me out! Juno was yelling now. Even my wolf thought I was a trash human.

I’m sorry, Juno, I apologized. I shouldn’t have shut you out. I just needed a little bit. I didn’t think it would be him. I forgot he wasn’t there on my first full moon shift. And I never… I never thought about him that way. It was just a shock.

My wolf seemed to accept this, but wasn’t done making me miserable. Now what are you going to do? He’s going to see your wolf. He’ll know it was you. He’ll know you just lied to everyone about finding a mate. He’ll know you left him with rogues. That you blocked his calls for help.

Fuck. I don’t know, I said. Apologize?

I don’t think you can just apologize for almost getting someone killed, Julien. I don’t think the mate bond will overcome that.

It sounds like I’ll just have to make things work without the mate bond then, I told him. The old fashioned way. He’ll have to fall in love with me. Then once he does, I’ll be able to explain and apologize.

So we’re not rejecting him? Juno questioned, going back to one of the many things I’d thought when I’d first felt the bond with Grayson last night.

No, I confirmed. This time we’ll be the ones chasing after him.

* * * * *

Much to my relief, Bennett had not come back to our pack with us. That did not mean Grayson had gone a whole 24 hours without f*****g someone else, though. The night we got back, I saw a guy with brown shoulder-length hair sneaking out of his room shortly after I felt them together.

I knocked on Grayson’s door.

“Come in!” He called. “Oh hey, Juls. What’s up?”

His room smelled like that guy and it was making Juno angry, but I pushed him back. I needed to start my plan now. Ultimately we’d have to fight and train together and he’d recognize me, unless I didn’t shift, and next month we’d have another full moon to deal with. This needed to happen quickly.

“Not much, just weird being back! I got used to having people around all the time at training school and the packhouse seems quiet in comparison,” I told him. That was partially true. I did miss my other Alpha friends.

He snorted. “You’re the only one who has ever referred to a packhouse full of werewolves as ‘too quiet’, Juls. Want to hang out a while? We can play video games or watch a movie.”

“Wanna play Madden?” I asked, hopeful.

“You’re on!” Grayson set up the game quickly and soon we were absorbed in football. He beat me twice, so we switched to watching baseball.

We were both resting against the headboard, facing the tv mounted on the wall across from the bed. Grayson had one leg stretched out, the other bent up at the knee, while I was sitting cross-legged.

“So you think you’ll go to the next mating ball?” He asked me.

I tensed. Welp, so much for easing in. Time to jump in if I didn’t want to increase my lies. “Uhhh. Maybe. Hey, can I ask a question?”

“Of course,” he flipped the channel to a different baseball game, unbothered by our conversation.

“What’s it like dating guys?”

That got his attention. He turned to me slowly, an odd expression, and for a second, I thought I had outted myself.

“Like… dating them or having s*x with them?” He clarified. Oh Goddess.

“Uuuhhhh. Both?”

Grayson chuckled. “You thinking of finding yourself a nice boyfriend? I can recommend a few guys…”

“No!” I snapped, then remembered to calm down. “Haha. I just was thinking, I’ve only been with girls, so, it was something I was wondering about just in case my mate is a guy.”

“Hmm. Your mate won’t be a guy,” Grayson laughs. “The Moon Goddess knows what’s in your heart. She wouldn’t pair you with a guy if you’re not attracted to him.”

Too late! I think internally. But truthfully, I’ve always thought Grayson was attractive. Those green eyes, and the way his black hair was always hanging in them. The way he had muscles on top of muscles.

I realized I was checking him out as I thought about his words, and he was looking at me amused. “Juls, if you wanna f**k, just say so,” he joked, punching my shoulder as he fluttered his eyelashes at me.

“You’re such a d**k,” I muttered, blushing, embarrassed now.

Grayson leaned away, looking at me with a curious expression for a minute. “So you’re seriously wondering?”

“I mean, maybe not anymore. Congratulations, Grayson, you’ve ruined it for all men everywhere. Forever deprived of me,” I laughed, probably too loudly, pretending I was not at all mortified to be having this conversation.

He grinned. “Well, damn, Juls, way to make me the villain.” Grabbing the Xbox controller, he turned the system back on. “Wanna go another game?”

“You’re on!” I mimicked his response from earlier, glad to be moving on to a new topic. I definitely needed a better plan before I tried to fix this mate bond.