Everyone Has Secrets

I Just Want to Retire Part 2

As paranoid as I am I do intentionally let myself fall into some vulnerable s**t to balance it out. My theory is if you let yourself be vulnerable from time to time; as long as it benefits you it should work itself out. Letting Victor track me from time to time has been very beneficial and nothing bad has happened so far so it has worked itself out. I think he like to have someone around from time to time that doesn’t try to tie him down. I like the s*x, free food, extra money, and the best part… he leaves. After the time I have been having lately. I for real would like to f**k the pain away and get paid for it. I like that he calls a car for me now to where his at because his not allow at my house any more. The snake hates him. It’s going to suck because he really has been last minute lately. I going to have to stop seeing him. It will be hard to get a last-minute babysitter if this is going to be his pattern.

Me -Where am I going to?

Vic – the Hotel next to the airport, I’m here on layover

Me- cool.

Vic- how much you want this time?

Me- I have no idea what you are talking about

Vic- Vicki

Me-30

Vic- Check your account

You know when you been in a situation so long you forget it’s not normal. I’m in that situation. It starts small amount because I was pissed and I thought we would be dating 1,2,3 but then he ghosted me. And when he came back the amount grew exponentially. This tryst will cost him about 30 – 40 thousand dollars which is a discount because he called at a really good time this time. He wasn’t lying when the shared it was the hotel by the airport. This hotel is always the best. The high classes rooms are fun to f**k in.

“Where are you?” I called him on his phone.

“I’m coming to get you, are you hungry?” His voice is always sexy to me. He has a deep voice with a bit of an Asian accent which is something I love.

“No, I was drinking with a coworker when you called”

“O too bad, I wanted to spend more time with you tonight. My little bird” he has been called him bird for a long time now. I guess I tend to “fly away” after sleeping with him.

“should’ve called earlier”

“I want in an airplane earlier. Bird I called as soon as I could.”

He grabs my waist and press his head in my neck kissing me.

“Hey you, when did you learn to walk so quietly?” I turn around and hugging him and kissing him back.

“You really have been drinking tonight. I taste it on your breath. I wonder how you will taste tonight”

Now sir you why you always gotta be threatening me like this. “if we stay down here how are you going to find out”

I don’t know who say Asian men aren’t sexy. However, any man who make you really feel sexy becomes a little sexy. But these bricks on this guy’s arm feels really sexy. I really just going to enjoy this. I love how he grabs me and how he caresses me. When that tongue licks every part of me and when it lick in between my legs it makes me f*****g shake. His stroke game is not a isn’t that bad either (now). Like you the f**k where you f*****g before because you need a lot of instructions before. But I guess when I cost as much as I do you gonna learn.

“Thanks, I needed that” cuddling with him after s*x with him.

“Yea lucky for you, you are always good for a fun time”

“Victor I think you mean” adjusting myself to look at him “you are lucky, You are always a fun time. Why else would I bother”

“because of money bird”

“you funny”

“What do you mean”

“The money is to just to deal with you. If the sexy continue to be bad. I would have had movational to find someone else.”

“ you don’t mean you wait for me every time we are on a break”

“Frist we are never “on” to have a “break” and this conversation is starting to look like a bout 30” I see my phone light up. “continue”

“ I think we are going not see each other again”

“I’m low balling today another 50 and what do you mean”

“ you are going to cause me to be broke”

“boy you lyin, what do you mean” I say in a playful tone.

“another arranged marriage. This one seems more fitting for me.”

“ok.” He puts me closer

“what do you mean. OK. Don’t you care?” he says nuzzling into my neck

“no really, we are not really a real relationship thing. WE have been seeing each other for years but the terms has always been limited. You have done this a few times already and it cost more and more, the more YOU come back to Me. I have been thinking about cutting you off completely anyway.”

“Bird you are the one lying to me now. I have you completely why else would you wait for me. Why else would you take me back?” It seems like his trying to start again and it this is the last time. Why the f**k not. I get on top of him.

“I’m lazy, this has been very convenient, and after this moment it’s not gonna be. Simple” I say riding him. Him puts me closer to him.

“ You don’t have to put on an act for me” I have been too accommodating. He thinks he has more control in this situation than he does. But knowing this guy I’m going to get like 250 as “brake up fee”, and when he realizes he doesn’t like this one his going to come back. I kind of meant it this time because in the future he isn’t going to be convenient no matter how much money you throw at me. He has been extra not necessary. But he doesn’t need to know that. I take a shower in the hotel room and leave and get into a car to the house. I take off this tracking on my phone and block my phone on his and my phone. Why do guys sleep so heavy?

Going back to work today is not something I wanted to do. Yesterday Suck. Victor is always a nice break but f**k. This is the countdown to vacation and then figuring out what I’m going to do after this ultimatum of my life or being a surrogate to the werewolf community. Which is some bullshit I have to think about. Not right now but I will have to get it some thought on how to deal with it. Look at this new project is helping to get my mind of thing all that bullshit. Looking over the lay out of the building they want and how they would like to layouts to be. I stop and think.

“all this time….”

“all this time, What?” Andrew comes around the corner.

“nothin”

“Vicki I want to know” he looks at me with those puppy dog eyes

“it’s really nothing important, Just speaking outloud”

“But your thoughts are interest”

“you wont let go uh”

“no” he said with a smile on his face

“just thinking about how all the project I work on is are pack housing or community”

“o”

“yep, told you notin important”

“maybe a little important?”

“how”

“this project” he say pointing to the screen. “this..” he looks around to see if anyone around. Burh you late. Why would you start a conversation without looking first? Lucky for you I’m not late I know there is no Human who can hear us. “This Alpha has a lot of connection, money, power. We are a small pack by comparison. This is a very important request for us.”

I take a deep breath and look down and then up at Andrew “Why would ya’ll trust me with this? Why not one of ya’ll”

“is Vicki turning down money”

This time I look around to make sure no one (wolf or human) going to hear this. “Na Victoria is looking out her life at this point. I am not longer in danger of getting fired. I’m in danger of death”

“Vicki you’re overacting”

“na you underreacting”

He grabs my shoulder “ You’re overacting. You have been doing projects like this forever. Honesty, at this point I would be more worried if another person had this project”

“this sucks”

He looks at my computer “for something that sucks you doing a great. As always.”

I just want to not work actively any more. I just want to start a family. I just want my life.

“ I think I need to go home early.”

“really? Are you not feeling ok?”

“Not after this conversation. This is the conversation that put me into the not ok. I think I need to work at home until my vacation” I say as my head in on my desk.

“ I guess that reasonable” what do you mean you guess that’s reasonable? Don’t lift your head so he can see your “excuse you fucker face” .

“I talk to my uncle he said ok “

“Nope I’m not going to ask how is that’s possible. I’m going home. I’ll see you later” I said grabbing my stuff and dipping out of that place faster than I ever had before.

Driving home really be a time to think about life and all of its troubles. Like how I deserve a break breakdown vacation. I know I asked for a month off when I should be retiring from working a 9 – 5. So… I will settle for a break-down vacation to reevaluate my life and what should I be doing from this point on. Life is too weird. I thought I be so done with this type of thing. But nope got to play this damn game a little bit longer with some new rules ion really know. I need to find out the rules I’m playing with now cause that will help a lot. The new moon around the corner but I can’t do anything unless I know, know what going on and what I’m working for. Ok. I will get to work on my plan after my vacation and I fully understand the s**t my coworker put me in. Because if I’m being honest to myself, he could have just pushed everything under the rug and let me be.