Author's Note
Narito ako sa concert ni Gio.My BESTFRIEND. He's real name is Giovan but I want to call him Gio. He's now singing his last song 'PERFECT by Ed Sheeran' and it's beautiful. I am so happy and also sad because when his song ended this will be last time I see him.
"Joy,ask me to stay. I'll stay.Just this once be selfish"nakaluhod na siya at umiiyak nung sinasabi niya yun.Piniglas ko ang kaliwa kong kamay na hawak niya.
"You don't have to stay.... Gio, you're going to gain nothing by staying"naiiyak kong wika sa kanya.
"No,I had you. You mean so much to me more than you can imagine.Joy, you're my everything"umiling ako sa kanya.
" No,you will gain nothing because my heart already..." pumikit ako at umiling iling sa kanya." into Kian" I straightly lied and said it to his face.Nakita ko kung gaano siya nasaktan but it's for his sake. I-It's for his sake."I love you..into memories" I whispered.
Tumayo na siya at pinahid ang luha niya.It kills me how hard he cried for me.Inayos niya ang polo shirt niya at saka tumingin ng diretso sa akin.Pinahid niya ang luha sa makabilang pisngi ko at ngumiti. I loved that smile.
"Sana maging masaya kayo" he said and before he went to stage he tapped my shoulder.
Nakapasa siya sa Music Academy sa California at ginawa ko ang tama at nararapat gawin . Nagsinungaling ako sa kanya na hindi ko siya mahal kahit ang totoo mahal na mahal ko siya,nagsinungaling ako upang huwag niyang talikuran ang pangarap niya. I lied that I love Kian more than him. I don't want him to give up on his dream because maybe ...maybe he regrets it someday.
"Baby you look perfect tonight"he ended the song with all of his heart and when I met his eyes it's broken.... and it kills me.
"Gio..." I want to say and shout 'I love you' to him but if it's the meaning he will lose his dream. It's hard but it's better this way.
"Thank you for coming tonight, hope you enjoyed it and just like what I said earlier this is my last concert. Thank you and... "tumigil siya at matiim na tumingin sa akin " I'm gonna miss you" Naglakad na siya papunta sa back stage at naghiyawan ang fans niya. He's leaving and I must let him free, I must let him grab his dream. Alam kong ito ang dapat.
Hindi ko namalayan na wala na siya sa Pilipinas at kami na Kian. Maraming buwan ang lumipas sa una ang sweet namin pero nung nagtagal he bacame possesive.Akala ko dahil sa mahal niya lang talaga ako pero hindi pala ayaw niya lang na maaagawan.
Kung kailan natutuhan ko na siyang mahalin saka ko naman nalaman na nagloloko siya, marami kaming binabakuran niya. Akala ko magiging masaya ako sa lalaking mahal ka pero hindi pala so I decided to break up with him.
"Ano ba, bakit mo ba ako sinusundan? "sigaw ko sa kanya. Kanina pa siya sumusunod sa akin sa akin mula classroom hanggang sa next class ko.
"Joy, kausapin mo kasi ako!" he's voice telling me his not begging, he's commanding me.Humarap ako sa kanya at kita ko kung gaano siya ka-frustrated.
"A-anong pag-uusapan natin? "naguguluhan kong tanong sa kanya.
"Did you really mean that you're breaking up with me, Joy? "kalmado na ang pagsasabi niya nun.
" Yeah, so back off! "I frustratedly said and leaving him behind.Naglakad na ako papunta sa building 6 kung saan ang next class ko. I am in my last year of ABM on Senior high. I want to be Architect just like my father.
Matapak na ako ng unang hakbang sa hagdan ng nakaramdam ako ng hilo, sunod nuon ang pag-ikot ng paningin ko. "A-ahhhh!!" I shouted when my heart ache too. I saw black before I faint.
****************************
"Kuya,is this really Sarliengo? "We are from Canada to identify my sickness but in the three years of staying there,the doctors failed to identified it.Tanghali na kami nakauwi sa Pilipinas at hapon na nakadaong ang bangkang sinakyan namin kanina papunta dito sa Sarliengo.I'm still a kid when I went here and it changed. It became more Gorgeous and captivating in my eyes.
"Yup" Kuya answered while looking at the front. He's tired. I know that ,but he still managing to taked care of me. I love Kuya so much.
Binuksan ko ang bintana ng kotse ni Kuya Harvey and a refreshing breeze welcomed me.Tumingin ako sa labas, Ughh the power of sunset and wow the trees were lining in highway while the birds are singing. Sounds good in my ears and what a wonderful view.
Nakarating kami sa Main City Sarliengo hindi ito kagaya ng ibang mga City na para bang nagsulputan lang ang building dun.Kasi dito sa Sarliengo it was organized, everything was organized. Tumigil si Kuya kaya naman nilibot ko ang paningin ko. We arrived at Claves Hospital. Lumabas na si Kuya kaya ganun din ako.
Nakita ko ang kabuuan ng harap ng Hospital. The walls are colored by white, the hospital had 8 floors. It's was like hotel. The fudge!
Pumasok na si Kuya kaya sa loob kaya sumunod na rin ako. Nurses and doctors greeted him as he walk inside the hospital and Kuya Harvey just nodded and smile.Pinagtitinginan din ako ng mga tao dito specially the lady nurses that obviously had crush on Kuya.I heard them saying I am Kuya's girl, I am definitely Kuya's girl but not in a romantic way.Gosh!
Naglalakad pa rin kami ng nakarinig kami ng sigawan at tawanan.They are guys according to their voice and they are filling this floor by their noise.Maya-maya ay may lumabas na lalaking naka-hospital gown na tumatakbo at may humahabol sa kanyang doctor.
"Tanda,hindi mo ako maabutan!.Hahhha" sigaw nung lalaki sa humahabol na doctor sa kanya.
" Sky Morris!!.....Humanda ka!!" sigaw nung Doctor.Mabilis na pumunta ang doctor sa elevator at bumaba siguro akala niya naandun yung lalakeng Sky daw yung name?
"Hahhahha" tawa nung lalaki mawawala na sana siya sa paningin ko dahil masakay na sya ng elevator pero ng nakita niya ako.Tinigil niya ang pagsara ng elevator at mabilis na lumabas at tumakbo sa amin.
"Hey dude, what's up?"he cooly said to Kuya Harvey.
"Nice, you're in crazy mode again?" my Kuya asked.The guy just chuckled and nod.I heard his name is Sky from the doctor chasing him a while ago.
"Joy right?" bigla akong nagitla sa sinabi niya.Kilala niya ako?
"Y-yeah,paano mo nalaman?" I asked.Tumawa naman si Kuya.
"Paano hindi ka maalis sa isip ng gagong 'yan" sabi ni Kuya.
"Luh, s-sinasabi mo diyan... Madalas ka kasing makwento sa akin ni Harvey.."sabi nya habang matalim siyang tumingin kay kuya.
" Kuya, huh?" I said. Sabay siniko ko si kuya sabi niya kasi nung nasa Canada kami.Wala siyang pakialam sa akin even he's action speak opposite.
"Ano!" tinas-taas ko ang kilay ko sa kanya dahil bwisit na naman siya.Hahhaha."Huwag ka ngang maniwala sa baliw na 'yan"pagdedepensa niya.
" Joy..."napaharap naman ako dun sa kaibigan ni kuya kay 'Sky'." Joy.. let's be friends"masaya niyang sabi.
" Huwag kang makipagkaibigan sa baliw na 'yan"rinig kong bulong sa akin ni Kuya.
Pinagmasdan ko muna siya. He's wearing the Hospital Gown.He is tall,I guess he's 7'2 or up maybe. He had fair skin,thick brows, eyelashes, brown eyes and pointed nose.He had looks. He's charming.
"Anong sakit mo?"I asked him.Napakamot naman siya sa batok habang nakatingin sa taas then nag-pout bago sumagot sa tanong ko .
"Sabi nila baliw daw ako" diretso niyang sabi.Napagahalpak naman ng tawa si Kuya.
"Baliw ka naman talaga" kung titingnan si Kuya na tumawa ngayon para siyang hindi siya professional.
"Siniraan mo na yat--"
"Okay"pinutol ko na siya sa pagsasalita.Taka naman silang tumingin sa akin.
"H-huh?" they asked chorus.
"Okay " sabay abot ko ng kamay sa kanya.Noong natindihan niya na,mabilis niyang kinuha ang kamay ko at shinake itong parang bata.
"Uyy,uyy,ano yan?" bigla naman may nagsalita sa likod ko.Humarap ako at may dalawang kambal na matangkad na lalaki sa harap ko.I think they are 7 feet kagaya ni kuya pero mas matangkad pa rin yung may hawak ng kamay ko.Yuong isa mukhang rakista at yung isa may pagka-nerdy because of his glasses but they are handsome.
Teka yung kamay ko.Mabilis kong inalis kay Sky yung kamay ko.Nakita ko pa sa Peripheral vision ko na nag-pout pa siya.Baliw nga talaga toh.
"Bro, girlfriend mo?" tanung nung lalaking parang badboy na rocker kay kuya.Binatukan naman siya ni Sky.
"Hoy,Artemis sira ka ba?Si Joy yan,kapatid ko!." sabi ni Kuya sa kanila.Tumango-tango naman sila at kita ko na nagsmirk sila kay Sky.
"Pwede manligaw?" nagitla ako sinabi nung 'Artemis'.
"H-huh?" baka kasi na mali lang ako ng dinig.Bigla naman akong inakbayan ni Sky at at inilagay ang ang mukha niya sa balikat ko at at nag-pout.
"Back off dude,she is now my girlfriend" nagtaka naman ako sa sinabi niya Sky.Anong girlfriend?"Babaeng kaibigan.Arghh,mindless bunch of guys"maarte niyang sabi.He sounded like gay.
" Babaeng kaibigan, Arggh, mindless bunch of guys" Artemis mimicked.Note the gay tone.
" Dude,bakla ka ba?"gulat na gulat na sabi ni Sky kay Artemis.Gusto kong matawa kung gaano nanlaki ang mata nung kasama at kakambal ni 'Artemis' kuno.
"He's cute" bigla naman silang natigil sa pagtatalo at napagtanto kong nasabi ko pala yung nasa utak ko.
"Hoy, Achilles lumayas ka nga diyan!" pagtataboy ni Sky. Wow Achilles and Artemis they're names came from mythology. Fascinating.Inakbayan naman ni Artemis si Achilles at naglakad sila paalis.Kinulbit naman ako ni Sky kaya tumingin ako sa kanya.
"Hmmmp,tatampo ako" naka-pout niyang sabi.I want to laughed by his face right now.He looks like a kid.
"Skie,mukha kang pato" pinipigilan ko ang tawa kong sabi. Hindi pa rin ako nagbabago.The way I talked to a friend.
"Skie?" he curiously asked.I nodded and pinch his cheeks.
"Everybody called you Sky so I will call you Skie"I said.Inalis ko na ang kamay ko sa pagkakapisil sa pisngi niya. Lumingon ako sa kanang banda ko at nakita kong wala na ruon si Kuya."Kuya?" I looked around and Kuya's nothing to find.Arggh!!!
"Does you had a friend?" nag-aalangan ako sa nagtanong sa akin nun at nakita ko si Skie.Bakit niya natanong yun?He is the first one asked me that after I lose Gio.My bestfriend.
Naramdaman kong namumuo na naman yung luha ko.The happy memories and our goodbyes flash to me and it hurts.I feel my heart ache.Oh,not again.Lord,not again.
"Yeah,I had but.... I let him go" I smiled to him after I said that.A tear escaped to my right eye.
"Hindi na ako magtatanong pa kung bakit. If you feel like you're no longer can bare the pain. I'll listen and understand"parang nag-iba ang tao ang kaharap ko ngayon. He was like a kid a while ago but right now, the way he seriously looked at me. He changed into mature guy.
"Sky Morris!!!!!!" umugong ang sigaw nung lalaking humahabol kay Skie.
"Oh,no"he said. I want to laughed to Skie.Seeing how he panicked and run to elevator just to escaped the old doctor chasing him.
" While the sky in heaven waiting for me.I think they brought Skie to be my sky,here in land" naiiling kong sabi.
"Joy ,come here!" I heard my kuya's voice.I turned around and then I saw kuya wearing his lab coat and then a stethescope hanging on his neck.Naglakad ako papalapit kay kuya at sinabi niyang sumunod ako.We enter a room and then a hospital bed welcomed me.
"Goodnight Luna"he said before closing the door.
"I hate curfew!" 6 pm na kasi and that's my time to take a rest.Wala na akong magagawa dinapuan na rin ako ng antok.Humiga na ako at bago matulog ay nagdasal.
"Praise to you our Almighty Father,thank you for this wonderful day.Hope I will get better, lord Jesus.My savior.In the name of our father in heaven.Amen."
" Kuya.....kuya I'm here" I am crying while saying that.My kuya he's crying and I don't know why.Lumapit ako sa kanya at tiningnan ang iniiyakan niya at ganun na lang ang pagkagulat ko.
Caluna Joy Madrigal
1996-2006
Nakasulat ang pangalan ko sa lapida.Ibig sabihin patay na ako?Pero paano?How can I be dead?
"No!!!..No!" I shouted and suddenly I woke up. I'm terribly catching my breath.Bumangon ako at nanginginig na tumayo upang hanapin si kuya.
I need to see him. I'm holding the door knob when I felt my head spinning and my heart aching.Oh not again,Lord not again.Please...