Chapter2:Guilt
1121 Words
Kael’s pov;
Sweat clung to my body like a second skin as I slammed my fists into the tree around the training posts.
Blow after blow, my knuckles tore open and healed again, a dull cycle of pain that was starting to numb everything else. I wanted to punch something, feel something…but this was all I could think of.
The moon was just beginning to bow out for the sun. It was impossible to believe that last night was the sacred blood moon, a time of great celebration.
But since her death, I’ve been unable to celebrate anything. I prohibited all ceremonies, unwilling to be happy if she wasn’t with me.
I had hardly slept and should have gone back to bed, but sleep had become an enemy, just like the face of the woman who haunted it.
That voice.
Soft. Desperate. Calling out my name like I was her salvation.
And every time, I woke up with a racing heart and a guilt I couldn’t explain.
Most of the warriors had gone to the borders after hearing that there was disturbances there, by none other than Alpha Darien’s people. My men were competent, so I couldn’t be bothered to go.
“f*****g hell!” I screamed as I threw one final punch, the post cracked down the center with a groan of splintering wood, but I didn’t feel any satisfaction. Just that same gnawing hunger deep in my chest, the place where my wolf stirred.
"She’s real," my wolf whispered for the hundredth time that morning. "She needs us."
I gritted my teeth and ignored him.
No. I wasn’t going down that path again. Not after what happened the last time.
My tunic was drenched in sweat, my throat dry as I dragged a cloth across my face and turned away from the training field. Servants bowed low as I passed them, murmuring greetings I didn’t answer. I didn’t have it in me to pretend today.
I should have gone straight back to my chambers. Should’ve locked the door and drowned the memory in whiskey and steel. But my feet carried me to her tower before I realized where I was going.
Rielle.
The cursed seer who saw too much and told too little.
The only one I hadn’t yet executed for speaking truths I didn’t want to hear.
The old tower creaked as I stepped through its doors, the scent of dried herbs and ash were thick in the air. She was already waiting, seated cross-legged on a cushion, her eyes glowing faintly gold from whatever trick of magic she used to peer through the veil.
"Alpha," she said with a small smile, like we were old friends. "You are here."
"Against my better judgment," I muttered, dropping into the chair across from her. My arms were still shaking from the training, and my wolf paced just beneath the surface. "I’ve been disturbed."
Her brow lifted. "By a woman in your dreams."
I hated how calm she sounded.
"Don’t start," I snapped. "Just tell me how to make it stop. I don’t want to see her face again. I don’t want to hear her voice."
"But you do." Rielle’s smile turned almost sad. "Because deep down, you know it already. She is your mate."
I let out a bitter laugh. "You’re still going on about that? I’m marrying Lady Victoria. The Council has already begun preparations."
"And yet you dream of another."
I stood too fast, my chair scraping back with a screech. "She’s screaming. Begging. Every damn night. Her hands reaching through flame. Why would the goddess send me someone I can’t save?"
Rielle tilted her head. "Because she is the only one who can save you."
Nobody can save me! I didn’t need saving!
"Careful now, witch," I growled, my voice low and dangerous. "You’re alive only because of a promise. Don’t mistake that for mercy."
But Rielle only smiled again. "You’re not angry with me, Kael. You’re angry with fate."
I turned on my heel, storming out of the room before I said something I couldn’t take back. Her voice followed me.
"You’ll see her soon enough. You were meant to."
Damn her.
Damn this curse.
I stalked down the corridor, my boots echoing off the stone.
The rising sun had turned the sky gold now, casting long shadows across the walls. I should’ve felt better after training. I usually did. But today, there was no release. No clarity. Just tension.
And guilt.
I hadn’t protected her. Not the first one. Not this one either, whoever she was. That made two mates now that the goddess saw fit to curse me with.
The first one I failed.
This one…I wouldn’t even go near.
Lost in thought, I didn’t notice the figure until a cane suddenly jabbed in my path, forcing me to halt mid-stride. I looked up into the sharp green eyes of Elder Magnus.
"Alpha Kael," he said smoothly, his eyes narrowing. "Out for an early stroll? Or were you chasing ghosts again?"
He knew. The bastard had his eyes and ears everywhere in the castle.
"Nothing so poetic," I replied, keeping my tone neutral. "I was training."
"Training, then visiting the witch?" he smirked. "Quite the productive morning."
"I had questions," I said flatly. "And she had no answers. As usual."
He studied me, like a hawk assessing weakness. I couldn’t afford to show any. Especially not now.
"Then perhaps it is time we focused your attention elsewhere," Magnus said with a sly edge. "Lady Victoria grows impatient."
I forced a smile, though it didn’t reach my eyes. "You’re right. We should set a date for the wedding. Pick something auspicious."
He blinked, clearly caught off guard. "You want me to choose the date?"
"You’re better at these ceremonial matters than I am," I replied coolly. "And I trust your judgment."
Lies, all of it.
But let him believe he had my trust. That was the only way to keep him close enough to control.
Victoria was a pawn. A calculated move to keep Magnus and his ambition in check. Mate or not, I would play this game the way it needed to be played. I didn’t need the goddess to choose for me.
I would choose.
Because when the goddess chose last time, she gave me a woman I couldn’t save. A woman who died screaming while I arrived too late.
This new woman, whoever she was, was better off without me.
Let her cry. Let her call. I wouldn’t answer.
I didn’t believe in second chances.
“Tomorrow.”
“What!” I snapped out of my daze, scrunching my briws in confusion.
“Alpha, the wedding has to happen tomorrow.”
- Writer
