No Strings Attached

April 4rth, 2022

Today I feel so ambiguous about life. Do we really need to get depressed about things we cannot control? The things and situations that seem so huge to us may just be nothing or minimal to the eyes of others. We have moral standards of things about right and wrong, or is it just the perspective?

Is it true about the phrase that "everything is fair in love and war?" Love is not only about being with a partner, but love also is with all our family members, and right now at this point it has been more than 2 years that I am away from my folks, and the worst part is I want to scream out loud, that I miss you, I love you, I never knew that leaving from Delhi Airport would be the last long time with them, maybe I would have hugged them from long instead of panicking about my packing to Canada.

I cannot tell them today what I am dealing with, all this lonely time, all this weird anxiety, because it won't just help them. On the same hand, I have to leave him because I cannot let down my family. Love is such a thing that changes your thoughts, the thing that you thought that you cannot do ever, it is morally incorrect... now it is just all in vain because your heart is controlling you. That rush, that feeling of touch and control is just more heavy than my moral doings......