“Loving Him, Hating Myself”She loved him in a way that slowly stopped feeling like love and started feeling like surrender.Every

CHAPTER 1: I SHOULD HAVE KEPT WALKING I should have kept walking. If I had, maybe I wouldn’t know what it feels like to love someone who was never mine. Maybe I wouldn’t have learned how painful it is to compete with a girl who doesn’t even know you exist. But I didn’t walk away. I stopped. And that was how everything started. --- It was a hot afternoon, the kind that makes your skin feel sticky and your mood worse than it already is. I was tired, distracted, and honestly just trying to get through the day. My bag slipped slightly off my shoulder, but I didn’t notice when my pen fell. “Hey.” I ignored it at first. “Hey… you.” I turned. And that was the first time I saw him. Jason. He didn’t look like trouble. That’s the funny thing. No warning sign. No red flag written on his forehead. Just calm eyes. A steady voice. And a presence that felt… easy. “You dropped this,” he said, holding out my pen. I blinked, slightly embarrassed. “Oh… thank you.” Our fingers brushed for a second when I took it. It was nothing. Just a small touch. But somehow, it stayed. “I’m Jason,” he added. I hesitated, then said, “Amara.” He repeated it slowly. “Amara.” The way he said my name felt different. Like it mattered. I should have left right there. But I didn’t.