The Exclusive Love of You

Introduction: The bishop in chess—always moves diagonally, lofty and unpredictable, never following the rules, acting solely on whims. I have a very simple mommy and a very complicated daddy. Mommy is so gentle, she makes me lots of delicious food, rubs my forehead, and cuddles with me to sleep. But whenever this happens, daddy comes over, picks me up from mommy's arms, and tosses me straight into the yard. Daddy says my face looks too much like his, so he doesn't like it. Hmph! I don't like daddy either, because he always monopolizes mommy. Mommy is like Little Red Riding Hood in fairy tales, naive and a bit scatterbrained; while daddy is that cunning big bad wolf. Well, the teacher said that boys should be strong and self-reliant. So I want to be that brave hunter and rescue mommy from daddy. But... teacher, if I become a hunter, can I skip school? I've never heard of a hunter having to attend third grade! But then again, maybe being a hunter isn’t as easy as I thought. Hunters probably need to know a lot of things, like how to track animals, build traps, and survive in the wild. Maybe even math and reading are important for that. I guess I’ll have to stay in school after all. Sigh. Still, I’ll keep practicing my hunting skills in secret. I’ve already started by sneaking up on the cat in the yard. She’s fast, but I’m getting better. One day, I’ll be strong enough to face daddy and win mommy back. Until then, I’ll just have to be patient and keep learning. After all, even hunters need a plan.