Damaged

I was getting off of work early today and I was so excited, today was Friday and I couldn't wait to get to my men we been together since I was 15 now I'm 22 years old. Working as a Dentist Assistant, life was really good. As I pulled up to the liquor store to grab my baby some of his favorite drink so we can just chill for the weekend. Then I headed to the grocery store to make his favorite meals.I was going to call him and let him know that I was off early but I wanted to surprise him. I pulling up I spot his best friend car in the driveway damn do he ever go home I said to myself. Now that his friend is here I decided to just call so I can get help with the bags, but no answer they probably in the basement playing the game. As I grab some of the bags. I decided to go through the back door so they can help me with the grocery. As I walked in the house was quiet I walked to the basement the game was on but no one around. I started to say his name but decided not too. I forgot Jim was coming over to help put the new TV stand up. Ryan big ass TVs I really don't understand it really but I'm down for it whatever makes him happy. Walking upstairs the door was halfway open as I pushed the door open I couldn't believe what I was looking at, my boyfriend the love of my life f*****g his best friend they was both so into it they haven't realized that I was standing there watching my boyfriend moan throwing his ass back bitting his lip with his eyes close. I was so shocked I couldn't move it wasn't until Jim finally opened his eyes that he realized I was standing there we made eye contact which this motherfucka had the f*****g nerve to smirk while still f*****g my boyfriend. Next thing I know everything I had for lunch was on the floor. That's when my presence was known, Ryan looked me in my eyes knowing he f****d up as I wiped my mouth. I ran downstairs as I can hear movement behind me. Ryan saying, let him explain its not what it look like. I turned around so fast, it look like you was getting f****d in you f*****g ass and was f*****g enjoying it. Baby let's talk please Talk Ryan you was having s*x with Jim in our bed then on top of that unprotected s*x. Why? huh why? All I did was love you if you was gay you didn't have to drag me along. Lisa baby, calm down please I do love you baby you gonna be my wife baby I'm sorry this not me it only happen two times baby, please baby don't leave me. Jim finally came down when he heard Ryan say it only happen twice. Stop lying to that girl we been f*****g for 3 years now and I'm tried of sharing. I looked at Jim with that same f*****g smirk, I seen early that's when I knew all the hints he was dropping over the years was true. How can I be so naive, I looked at both of them with so much hatred in my heart. I turned around and walked out the door. I can hear them arguing but that didn't matter to me cause Ryan was dead to me and his f**k buddy. Driving down to highway I could bearly see I had to pull over. I cried like a big baby, I asked God why? why me? why do I deserve this. I sat on the side of the road for three hours I had nowhere to go my home was no longer a home. I went to grab my phone and realized I left it back at the house and I know I wasn't going back there so I pulled into Walmart to buy me some feminine products had to stop at a*****e to grab some new work clothes for next week. Stop by t-mobile got a replacement phone with a new number so by me leaving my phone I had nobody number maybe that was for the best because I need time to think about my next move. Pulled in some weird as motel at this point I didn't even care just wanted to shower and take some pain medication. As I'm taking the rest of the grocery out that was for Ryan stupid ass. I started crying again making my way to my room I put everything away thank goodness they had a refrigerator then I grab the henny bottle off the table started drinking right from the bottle. Before I knew it I was passed out on the bed. Next morning I'm hearing banging on the door once my adjusted to the light I pulled the door open this sexy dark-skinned dude was looking at me like I was s**t on his shoe. Can I help you? Naw you can't..wrong room. Yea whatever, I slammed the door and looked around at what is now my life. After I washed my ass and put some food on my stomach I felt much better. As I look at myself in the mirror. I always thought I was beautiful shit.. I was 5"4 size 38c I had a decent booty and flat stomach I was peanut butter color with light brown eyes and hair wise was long and sandy brown so I just don't get what happen I cooked, cleaned, sucked,f****d everything to keep him happy just thinking about me sucking his d**k and f*****g him had me throwing up my food. After I cleaned up my mess I called my bestfrind Robin as I waited for her to answer I just knew she was about to lose her f*****g mind once I told her this shit.. I hate to say but Robin called that s**t a couple years ago.... 2 Years Ago Boo, I'm loving your new place, thanks girl me and Ryan is gonna hook this place up. Huh, you gone hook this place his ass just gonna sit around and live off you. Girl stop, I started laughing where his ass at anyway? I think he in the basement. I walked over to the basement door and it was locked. I looked at Robin and said there's reason for it to be locked. I walked over and grabbed a butter knife to pop the lock right when I came up to the door Ryan was walking out looking like he was just working out. Hey baby, Ryan kissed me on the cheek and grab a bottle of water, baby why was the door locked, oh maybe Jim locked it on his way down. I didn't know he was he was here I didn't see his car, yea his brother have it. ok baby I'm about to go finish working out call me if u need me. Ok baby, Girl that sounds like a lie, please Robin don't start, I'm not but they was probably f*****g. I was looking at her and started laughing but she wasn't girl bye you see all this woman he wouldn't need a man or a woman. Hello, Hello damn I zoned out for a sec, I took a deep breath hey girl its me girl, I need you to meet me at the hotel on Martin Ave, aww s**t what happen, b***h just get yo ass over here. As I'm running the story down to her, she just look at me then I started crying again. Boo everything will be ok, you know I'm here for you. I have to ask you something are. you going to get tested? That's when it hit me so much was going on that I forgot I was pregnant.