Endings
I stared at the now empty bottle of Merlot as tears streamed down my face. I thought it would make me feel better. I also thought the fresh haircut, new clothes and blacks stilettos would make me feel better. Powerful. Fixed. It didn’t. All I could feel was my heart breaking more and more with each passing minute. I looked around the luxurious house I was in and started to give myself a pity party. “Why?!!” I screamed into the emptiness. “Why couldn’t I have just made this work? What was so wrong with me?” A soft knock on the patio door pulled me out of my self loathing. The f**k? It is well after midnight. The neighbors all knew the owners of the house were gone and that I was staying here in their stead, house sitting. As I stepped outside, I knew it was him. I could feel him. Jensen. “I never lied to you.” His deep voice filled the darkness. “I do love you. We just can’t work.” I turned to go back inside. “Gabby.” He grabbed my wrist stopping me. I glared at him my eyes filling with tears again. I wanted to hate him with every fiber of my being. I wanted to hate the way his touch sent shivers down my spine and how his voice made my body heat from the inside out. “Don’t cry Gabby. Don’t cry over me. I’m not worth it.” He pulled me close wiping the fresh tears from my face. His thumb moving down to my mouth and lingering on my bottom lip. I still love him.I could feel the walls I’d tried so hard to build against him begin to crumble. He moved his hands and put them into his pockets. “I just came to see if you were alright. You look beautiful. I promise you will find someone better.” He leaned towards me and I closed my eyes inhaling his scent of soap and tobacco. His lips grazed my forehead and when I opened my eyes again, I was alone. I sank to my knees and let the tears fall again. It couldn’t be the end. Endings were supposed to be happy.