Amemoria

Ava's POV It was raining so hard, and lightning flashed across the sky as my tears poured down in rhythm with the raindrops. My heart shattered when I heard him say those words: "I never loved you." That was it. I was done with this s**t and all the false hopes I had clung to. I cursed his name and walked away. I wandered through the dark, rainy night, but I didn't even feel the cold. All I felt was anger and the coldness settling in my heart. I called Calvin. "Cal, can you please pick me up? I-I'm lost. I don't know what to do. I just want to go somewhere far away." "What's wrong, Ava? What happened? s**t, are you crying? Where are you? Don't worry. I'm on my way." Somehow, I felt relieved. At least someone was coming for me. But the ache in my heart seemed never-ending, so unbearable that I felt like I could die at any second. I couldn't tell Jade about this yet. I didn't want her to worry, and I didn't want her to hate Evans. I couldn't bear the thought of explaining what had happened, not when I could barely understand it myself. I waited for Cal in a nearby shed, hugging myself as I watched the rain pour from the roof. The sound of the raindrops hitting the ground was almost comforting. It drowned out my thoughts, even if only for a little while. From now on, I would never trust a guy again. I would never let anyone break through my walls again. I would never give someone the power to hurt me like this. Eventually, the rain began to slow until only a few drops fell from the roof. I wiped my cheeks and looked at my phone. Why wasn't Cal here yet? I checked the time, my fingers trembling slightly as I unlocked my phone. "Maybe he's stuck in traffic," I whispered to myself. But something didn't feel right. I called him again. The phone rang. Once. Twice. Three times. No answer. I swallowed hard and tried again, hoping he would pick up this time. "Come on, Cal. Please." The call went to voicemail. I stared at my screen, my heart beginning to pound. "Why isn't he answering? He said he was on his way." I tried calling him one more time, but the same thing happened. Voicemail. A strange feeling settled in my stomach. I tried to ignore it, telling myself that I was just overthinking. Maybe his phone had died. Maybe he was driving and couldn't answer. There were so many possible explanations. So why did I feel like something terrible had happened? I took a shaky breath and pressed his number again. "Cal, where are you? I'm still waiting here in the shed," I murmured when the call connected to voicemail. "Please call me back, okay?" I ended the call and hugged myself, suddenly feeling colder than before. Then my phone rang. I grabbed it immediately, relief washing over me. "C-Cal? I'm still here. Where are you?" Silence. I frowned and pulled the phone away from my ear to check the screen. The call was still connected. "Hello? Cal?" Nothing. "Cal, stop scaring me. Please, just say something." Then I heard it. A faint, broken sob. My smile disappeared. "Hello?" Another sob came through the phone, followed by a shaky breath that made my stomach twist. I knew that voice. "Jade?" "Ava..." Her voice cracked, and suddenly, I could barely hear her over the sound of her crying. "Jade? What happened? Why are you crying?" For a moment, she said nothing. And somehow, that silence frightened me more than anything else. "Jade, please. You're scaring me. What happened?" I could hear her struggling to breathe. She sounded as if she were trying to say something but couldn't find the strength to speak. Then she finally whispered, "Ava, it's me. You need to come here." My fingers tightened around my phone. "What? Why? What happened?" Another pause. My heart pounded so violently that I could feel it in my throat. "Jade?" "Cal..." She broke into another sob. "Cal was in a car accident." Everything stopped. The rain. The wind. The sounds of the world around me. For a moment, I couldn't hear anything at all. I stood there, staring into the darkness, waiting for her to take it back. Waiting for her to laugh and tell me it was a joke. Waiting for her to say that I had heard her wrong. But she didn't. Cal was in a car accident. No. No, that couldn't be right. Cal had just talked to me. He had told me he was on his way. He had promised he would come and get me.He couldn't be-"W-What?" My voice came out so quietly that I barely recognized it. "Jade, what do you mean?" "Ava, please-" "No." I shook my head even though she couldn't see me. "No, you must be mistaken. I just talked to him. He said he was coming to get me. He promised!" My voice broke on the last word. I pressed a trembling hand against my mouth, desperately trying to hold back the sob rising in my throat. "Please tell me he's okay, Jade. Please." I waited. One second. Two seconds. Three. Why wasn't she answering? "Jade?" "He's in critical condition, Ava." The words hit me harder than any slap ever could. My knees weakened, and I grabbed the wooden post beside me to keep myself from falling. My phone nearly slipped from my sweaty fingers. Critical condition. The words echoed inside my head, over and over again, until they no longer sounded real. My chest tightened. I tried to breathe, but every breath felt too small, as if the air around me had suddenly disappeared. "No... no, no, no..." I shook my head repeatedly, tears blurring my vision. Not Cal. Anyone but Cal. He was the one who answered my calls. The one who came running whenever I needed someone. The one who never made me feel like I was too much to handle. And now- I squeezed my eyes shut, but the image of him lying in a hospital bed appeared anyway. Was he conscious? Was he in pain? Was he calling for someone? Was he waiting for me? "Where is he?" I choked out. "Jade, where is he? Tell me where he is!" "I'll send you the location. Just stay where you are, okay? I'll have someone pick you up." "No! I need to see him!" "Ava, please, calm down-" "How am I supposed to calm down when Cal is in the hospital?" I screamed, my voice breaking. "I need to be there! I need to see him!" Jade started crying harder. Then she said something that made my blood run cold. "I can't contact Evans." Evans. His name was like a knife twisting in my chest. I didn't know what had happened to Cal. I didn't know why he had been in an accident. I didn't know where Evans was or why Jade couldn't reach him. All I knew was that everything was falling apart, and I couldn't stop it. "I'm coming," I whispered. "Ava, wait-" But I had already ended the call. I stumbled out of the shed, my vision swimming as I tried to make sense of what had just happened. My hands wouldn't stop shaking. My chest hurt. My stomach twisted until I thought I might throw up. I needed to get to Cal. I needed to see him with my own eyes. There were no buses or taxis around at this hour. The road was nearly empty, and the few cars that passed barely slowed down when I waved at them. "Please! Someone, please stop!" My voice disappeared into the night. I tried again, stepping closer to the roadside and waving both arms. "Please! I need help!" But the cars kept going. I felt so helpless. Tears streamed down my face as I pulled out my phone and called Jade again. "Ava, where are you?" she asked immediately. "I'll have someone pick you up. Just send me your location." "I don't know what to do," I sobbed. "Nobody's stopping. I can't find a ride. Jade, I need to get there!" "Please, just stay where you are. Cal is in critical condition, and I still can't contact Evans. I'm trying to figure everything out, okay? Just send me your location." Critical condition. There it was again. That horrible phrase. I pressed my free hand against my chest, trying to ease the pain, but it only seemed to grow worse. And then, like a cruel joke, my mind returned to the reason I had called Cal in the first place. Evans. His face flashed before my eyes, followed by the words that had destroyed me. I never loved you. I had been so consumed by my own pain that I hadn't thought about anything else. I had walked away, crying and cursing his name, and called Cal because I needed someone to save me from the mess inside my head. And now Cal was the one who needed saving. A terrible thought crept into my mind. What if something happened to him because of me? I squeezed my eyes shut. No. I couldn't think like that. But the guilt was already there, sinking its claws into me. "This is my fault," I whispered. "What do you mean, Ava?" Jade asked. "This isn't your fault, okay? Please don't think like that." "It's all my fault," I repeated, my voice trembling. "I called him. I asked him to come get me. If I hadn't called him-" "Stop it, Ava! You don't know that!" But I couldn't stop. The guilt was suffocating me. Every breath reminded me that I was standing there, alive and unharmed, while Cal was fighting for his life somewhere I couldn't reach. "I'm sorry," I sobbed. "Jade, I'm so sorry. I just need to get there. I need to see him." "I know. I know, Ava. Just please be careful." I barely heard her. I started walking, then running, desperately searching for a way to reach the hospital. I didn't even know if I was heading in the right direction anymore. My legs felt weak, and my head was spinning, but I kept moving. I couldn't stop. Not when Cal might be dying. Not when I hadn't even had the chance to thank him for always being there for me. I tried to flag down another car. "Please! I need a ride!" It sped past me. "Please!" Another car approached. I stepped closer to the roadside, waving frantically. My phone was still pressed against my ear, and I could hear Jade calling my name. "Ava? Ava, can you hear me? Where are you?" "Jade, I-I'm really sorry," I cried, barely able to form the words. "This is all my fault. I'll be there soon. I promise, I'll-" I stepped onto the highway. Everything happened so quickly. A blinding light appeared in front of me. A loud horn pierced the air. I turned my head, but it was too late. A tremendous impact struck my body, sending me crashing to the ground. Pain exploded through me, sharp and unbearable, like lightning tearing through every inch of my body. My phone slipped from my hand and skidded across the road. For a few seconds, I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't even scream. The world above me blurred into streaks of light and darkness. Somewhere nearby, I heard the screech of tires and the distant sound of someone shouting. Then I heard Jade. Her voice came faintly through the phone, trembling with panic. "Ava? Ava, what happened?" I tried to answer, but my lips wouldn't move. "Ava, can you hear me? Please, say something!" I wanted to tell her that I was sorry. I wanted to tell her that I was scared. I wanted to tell her that I hadn't meant for any of this to happen. But all that came out was a weak, broken breath. "A-Ava!" Jade screamed. "Please! Ava, can you hear me? Don't do this to me! Please, don't-" Her voice cracked into a desperate sob. I stared at the dark sky above me, feeling the world slowly slip away. The rain had stopped, but I could still feel the cold against my skin. Funny, wasn't it? Just moments ago, I had been afraid of losing someone I loved. Now, I was the one slipping away. My eyelids grew heavy. Jade's cries became distant, fading into a muffled echo. I tried to keep my eyes open. I really did. But I was so tired. So tired of hurting. So tired of feeling guilty. So tired of everything. And just before darkness swallowed me whole, one final thought crossed my mind. Cal, please be okay. Those were the last words I heard in my head before I closed my eyes and lost consciousness. Years have passed, yet it still feels like a dream.