Why did it have to be you

Broken: Jacolby

I could feel her pain. It burned through my veins like molten lava. I could feel each of her tears as they left her eyes and dragged themselves across her face. I can't get her off my mind as I continue to see her when I close my own eyes. Her broken heart seemed to call to mine, tearing away my defenses piece by piece making me feel weak as I fought my own wills. I was having an internal battle between the heart that was breaking away slowly and the heart that still belonged to a memory. My mind began to whirl as the thoughts of raven hair and silvery blue eyes fought with the girl with rainbow hair and the eyes that shone almost silver. How can I continue to have hope to find a memory of a girl somewhere in this world. I don't even know if she is still alive. Hell I don't even know if those memories are nothing but dreams. Though I can still feel the warmth of her embrace and the softness of her skin as I remember the hands that held mine so tenderly as we played games and told stories. But now all I can think about is the feeling of a naked body pressed warmly against my back her scars taking nothing away from the softness of her skin and the tenderness of her touch as she warmed my freezing skin and somehow my freezing heart. I lay in my bed being unable to sleep as I toss and turn in my sheets. My body ablaze with heat and a burning desire to go to her. Her cries as I left her room still sound in my ears as they continue to haunt me. She claims it was the only way to save me. But how could this be? How can a werewolf have a vampire for a mate? I don't understand. It's not anywhere in any of the books. This is the first telling of a vampire and werewolf being given each other as mates. After leaving her in her cell yesterday I found myself searching the castles library to find anything about a werewolf and a vampire being mates but came up with nothing. There was nothing not even in the ancient scrolls. My mind reeled at the thought of being the first for something. I've never been the first. I was never even supposed to be the heir to my own throne. That was my older brother who died at birth. He was stillborn only a few years older than me and when he didn't make it there needed to be a new heir born for the throne. That fell to me born only 3 years later. Every competition, every race I was always second and now I'm the first ever vampire mate. How can I allow this to be my fate? She may be beautiful but i don't believe that she will ever truly be mine. Our lives would never allow it. She is a wolf and I a vampire. We are 2 completely different creatures and yet the gods have made us for each other? I don't believe it. Not even for a second. There has got to be something else. Someone else for her. How can I begin to tell her that we just won't work. This doesn't make any sense to me. Why did the gods do this to us? I can't sleep. I climb out of bed and begin to pace. I know she can feel my restlessness just as I can feel hers. My heart aches for her. My skin yearns for her touch but I just can't go to her. Not after everything. There is nothing for us. Nothing between us. The gods chose the wrong mate for her and it breaks my heart to know that. I continue pacing till morning and look out my bedroom windows at the dark clouds above. I go to my bathroom and take a long hot shower. I wish the waters would wash away my troubles like the dirt on my skin. Once I'm washed I wrap my towel around my waist and get dressed in a black t-shirt and joggers. I've decided to go on a run. I run for what feels like hours seemingly going no where. I let my feet carry me not paying any attention to where I'm going. I eventually arrive at the edge of the meadow. Here the dark clouds are the thinnest but still provide enough protection that I won't burn. I sit along the edge and reminisce about all the good times I'd had here. Gradually I begin to fall asleep.

Time Lapse.

The sun was soon to set by the time I opened my eyes. It gave the clouds above me a purplish tint and made me think of the beautiful girl with a rainbow in her hair. The cacophony of strands that fell almost to her ass. I just want to run my fingers throuh...  i stopped my thought. Damn it! This bite is getting to me. Its altering my thoughts. I need to speak with her to find a way to stop all of this. I stand up and take one last look at the clouds and see the first star in the sky tonight shining through the last tinge of blue in the sky. I turn and walk into the woods knowing the way to the lake side home from here. As I made my way to the small lake house I caught scent of something lurking around the territory. I followed the scent to the waters edge where I found a glistening blackish blue wolf laying by the lake with its muzzle rested on its paws. It looked peaceful and serene. I didn't want to mess with it but i suppose it smelled me and its head rose from its paws to find me. I slowly began to move back with my hands in the air as I tried not to startle it. I thought I saw pain flash in its silver eyes and I stopped moving. The wolf then moved to stand and I blanched as it began to approach me. As it got closer I could see the softness of its fur and the small spots on its skin where it was missing fur. I don't know why but I wanted to apologize to it. It's not my fault its fur is missing. I'd never seen this wolf before in my life... oh my gosh. This is the wolf that saved me... this is the wolf that marked me... this is Addisons wolf. "Shift!" I commanded her. She looked at me with her head tilted to the side and huffed but shifted as commanded. Addison stood before me stark naked. "What the? Where the f**k are your clothes?" I asked as I tried to shield my eyes from her body. "When transforming we have to be completely naked otherwise we RIP our clothes. You demanded I shift and so I did. Sorry if my body makes you uncomfortable but i thought i would be alone today since it's already 8 o'clock." With that she walked around me and to the trees. She came back a few moments later wearing a loose pair of burgundy shorts and a black tank top. She didn't have a bra on so her n*****s looked to fight for freedom in the cold air. I had to fight myself to look anywhere but her chest. "How did you get outside?" I asked her trying to take my mind off her ample curves. "The window above my bed was never repaired and Winter and I really needed a run. We didn't go far I promise. Just a few times around the lake and up the drive way and back once." She answered seeming a bit scared. "If you were free why didn't you escape?" I don't know why she stayed. She had the perfect opportunity to leave seeing as no one was here today. "I know I'm supposed to be a prisoner here but that's not the only reason why I can't leave." She seemed to whisper yet I heard every word. Her words seemed to melt the icy exterior of my heart further. "Well let's get you inside. Your clothes are hardly formidable in this weather. She had visible goosebumps on her skin. We walked inside and went to the kitchen. I pulled out a pot and cutting board as she took her seat at the island and watched me silently. I pulled out a chicken I had placed in the fridge the day before to thaw out and pulled out a few veggies, rice and spices as I began to make chicken and rice with sauteed asparagus. I couldn't stop myself from asking the questions that had been nagging me the whole day. "How do I stop the bond?" When I asked this I wasn't looking at her but the bond allowed me to feel her hurt. The pain was so strong I dropped my knife and nearly cut my foot with it. "A formal rejection is required." She said in a quiet whisper. I could hear the sadness in her voice and it stung my ears like bees. "Is that all it takes?" I asked her. "That's all it takes..." With that she stood. "I'm not really hungry

 I'm just going to go to bed now. I'm sorry if I worried you by leaving my room. I'll keep the running down to a minimum." With that she walked out of the kitchen and down to the basement shutting her own cell door. I stopped cutting the chicken and turned the rice to a low simmer as I followed after her moments later. I walked to her cell door and notice it was dented out and realized that's where her wolf got the burnt fur. She hurt herself trying to get to me the day I almost drowned in the lake. She really did do all she could to save me. I could feel the anger and pain radiating off her skin from the other side of the door. I lean my back against her door and slide to the floor with my head in my hands as my mind and my heart were at war with each other. I could hear her gentle sobs even as they grew quieter and I realized she cried herself to sleep. I stood up and slowly opened the door to find her on the other side of it resting on the floor. I gently picked her up, feeling the tingles move through every part of my body she touched and I carried her to bed. I then placed her blanket on top of her and sat on the side of her bed. "I wont reject you but I can't promise to love you the way you want me to." With that I left her cell and left the door slightly ajar to let her know that she is free to move about the house. I sat in the kitchen on the same stool she had occupied earlier and wondered about my life. I never knew I would be wanted like this by someone. As a vampire I'm not supposed to have a mate. I'm not supposed to find someone made for just me. All the other vampires just enjoy bouncing around until they find someone they actually enjoy spending time with and just keep them around for as long as they can till they get bored of each other. But now I have a mate and she is a princess and werewolf. How can I break that to my family or to the world when I can barely handle the truth myself? I stay there for hours with my head in my hands as I think.

                                                                           Addison.

I woke with a major headache and a burning in my chest. All I want is to find him. I follow his scent of burning wood and caramel apples. I find him sitting on the stool I occupied earlier and I don't know why but I hugged him from behind. The tingles I felt were electric and I wanted nothing more but to hold him for the rest of my life. He didn't move as I held him other than to relax further in my arms. He smelled wonderful and all I wanted to do was breathe him in deeper. "I didn't mean to hurt you Addison. I'm just... scared." He quietly admitted. My eyes shined with tears as I nuzzled my face into his back. "I forgive you." I could never stay mad at him. No matter how badly he hurt me. We stayed like this for the better half of the night before he finally had to leave. After he left with a soft goodbye I sat in the kitchen and cried once more feeling helpless to the feelings that were slowly crushing me and taking over my mind and my heart. "Give him time my flower. He may not have a wolf inside him but he feels the pull of our bond." Winter said gently. I could feel her give my mind a nudge as she wanted out to run. I got up from the table and walked outside. The moon was high in the sky yet the clouds above blocked its view. I shed my clothes and allow the shift to take over my body as I give Winter control. Once shifted she begins to run around the forest. Her black fur keeping us hidden from anything that could be lurking in these woods. We run a great distance before I realize where she is taking us. We stop at the edge of the clearing and I can see the clouds have lightened the further away we get from the city. She slows down from her run and we find ourselves in the meadow. The grass is taller than I remembered it but the flowers are still as beautiful. Winter begins to run and jump as she always loved this place. As a pup we would come to this place. "Its where we first met our mate." Winter stated calmly through our link. "What?" I asked her with a startled tone. "You didn't know?" She asked me with fake confusion. "No I never knew and I still can't believe it. Mates don't normally find each other that young. They usually find each other at the Grand Ball held once a year." I stated in a matter of fact tone. She gave a semblance of a smirk. "You never wondered why those sky blue eyes and ash blonde hair felt so familiar?" She asked me knowing the answer. "Well of course but I just put it down as having seen a photo of him before or something." She snickered in her own way. "No my silly flower. He is the small boy from the meadow. The one you prayed to be your mate each night as you grew up." She said with a small wolfish smile. "I don't believe we should tell him." I told her quietly. "And why not my dear?" She asked. "Well I don't want him to love me for who I was. I want him to love me for who I am now and for who I will continue to grow to be." She nodded her head gently. "I understand Addison. Though I feel he will be broken when he finds out we knew." Though I knew she was right I still felt like I was doing the right thing for us.