Lycan's Rogue Mate

Chapter 18

Benson's POV

What a stupid thing to have, it'll only make you weaker. Cause now your enemies know how to attack you and bring you down. I didn't build my pack up to let it go down the drain because of a mate. I'm alpha's of all alpha's for crying outloud, I don't have time to be weak. My pack needs me. Well they need there fuckin Luna too, you dipshit! my beta Luke said.

She'll only make us weak, , i reply. Look i know what you went through is hard Benson, trying to find Maria to no avail and now that you have seen Lucy and you have to take care of her, but not everyone is like her, you gotta trust the moon goddess, she knows what she's doing. Luke said. Sure she does, i got everything i need here Luke, Luna are just gonna make you weak, like my poor excuse of a father. I spat disgusted, that I'm even having this conversation with my beta right now. Benson you gotta let go, and move on the moon goddess paired you with Lucy-" I cut him off, Enough Luke, I'm not speaking to you about this, don't you dare bring up that name again, I love Maria and I will try to find her. With that said, I block him off.

Some moments later …..

"Hey", my beta Alex said popping in my office. "What do you want" I reply. "Nothing just wanted to thank you for letting Ava join our pack, oh I check on Lucy before leaving, she seems to be adjusting well in the Pack house" he said, my grip on my pen was so tight I broke the damn thing. Cheap s**t.

"Did i ask about her Alex" I question.

"No, but I thought you'd like to know. Since you let her stay there, why not just let her become the mother of your pups and our real Luna this time around, mayb she might be the cure to Maria heartbreak", he asked.

"She didn't want too, enough about Lucy, tired of hearing about her", I said losing my cool.

"Alright I'm out, try to get some rest man, you've been on pack duties non-stop", he said before leaving my office. I know he means well, but sometimes he doesn't know when to shut the f**k up.

I was heading home, to my home, i have my own house, I built for myself, for peace and quiet. The packhouse can get quite hectic sometimes. I walked in, walked upstairs, took a shower, layed my head down on my bed, then quickly drifted off to sleep… I woke up feeling constricted, like I couldn't breathe, what the f**k is going on. Only one thing.. Lucy, something must be wrong. I got up, shifted into my black wolf, and ran straight to the packhouse . But was stopped by my border patrol. I growled furiously, mind link him thats it's me their alpha. He quickly apologize.

I was heading home, to my home, i have my own house, I built for myself, for peace and quiet. The packhouse can get quite hectic sometimes. I walked in, walked upstairs, took a shower, layed my head down on my bed, then quickly drifted off to sleep… I woke up feeling constricted, like I couldn't breathe, what the f**k is going on. Only one thing.. Lucy, something must be wrong. I got up, shifted into my black wolf, and ran straight to the packhouse. But was stopped by my border patrol. I growled furiously, mind link him thats it's me their alpha. He quickly apologize.

i was running towards Lucy's cottage, almost there, until i heard a loud scream.. i stop in my track, to see her in her bed, from her window, she was whispering something I couldn't quite make out, yea us werewolf have 10x better hearing then human, but there are times where you don't hear s**t too. She was crying in bed, then she said "All this pain is slowly killing me" with so much hurt. I stayed there, like a creep waiting till she fell back asleep. Then headed back home. My home was empty, quite, lonely. I walk up stairs, layed in bed…

Am I the reason she is so hurt? After hearing her say that, it killed me, I mean my wolf , he wanted to be with his mate and that was Maria not Lucy. I don't know why I have this connection with Lucy as if she was Maria, I want to comfort Lucy, to reassure here that he's here, and he would never hurt her. This is why I say mates only make you weak, we're the strongest pack in ther world, and here he is weak over a girl. Shaking my head from the thought, I turned to see my alarm clock say, 4:30 Am, i decided closed my eyes and fall back to sleep. Cause I'll be up in an hour or two.2

I tippy toe and kissed his cheek. Then we both was stuck in place. WHAT. THE. HECK. DID. I. JUST. DO, I started blushing like crazy. I felt my face tomato red. So I did the one thing I could of think of.. slammed the door in his face. Lock it, and ran to my room. I wanted to scream into my pillow but knew better. Cause we werewolves have super good hearing. And honestly I'm not sure if Benson is still standing at my door or not.

Good one A, using the fact that he help you to kiss him. Even i didn't think of that, my wolf said. Shut up, I wasn't planning on doing it. It just freakin happen, he didn't even showed any emotion. Ughh he probably thinks I'm desperate for the Luna position. I said angrily. That's not true, he's our mate, i know he feels the mate bond, as much as we do. He wouldn't think that of us. my wolf said defending him. Okay lynn did you see any emotion? Love? Lust? Desire? Anything?… yea thought so. That shut her up. She blocked me. I can feel her pain.

I woke up the next day, ready to start work. At the border waiting for clearance..

"alpha said your clear. Meet him in his office" the guard said. I walk into the pack house it was probably around 7 or 8. Walking up stairs to the fourth floor. It all over, here I am in front of the double door again. I knock.. "come in" he said in a husky voice. Oh gosh imagine waking up every morning to that… what are you thinking, Lucy. Shaking my head, I headed inside.

"Hi, i'm here for ther chores" he didn't even look at me. My hurt sting a little. "I called one of the omegas to retrieve you." He said emotionless.

"Hi, my name is Milka, I'm here to see Lucy." She said hesitantly. Walking out hits office, I turn to look at him as I was leaving. He didn't even look up. Walking downstairs I was told to stick close to Milka. Not to wonder around, because I am a rogue. I've never felt so outta place. Almost everyone look at me with disgust. Mothers grabbing their child hands closer to them. You can hear some people calling me names. But it didn't phase me. I kept to myself doing my job. Which by the way I sucked at. I grew up alpha daughter. I didn't know any of this cleaning, washing clothes. I only know how to cook. Cause momma taught me since I was able to turn the stove on.

Sitting at the kitchen island for a well needed break. "How's work A?" Ava ask sitting next to me. "Im beyond tired, sore all over, I've never worked this much in my life" I said. While attempting to lay my head down on the island. "Haha, here let me help" and Ava started messaging my shoulder and back.

"Did I mention I've got the most awesomest bestfriend ever!" I said, then I see Milka motions me to go back to.. work. "Gotta get back to work" i told Cassie,

"you sure you don't need help" Cassie ask. "Yea, it's my job" i respond back.

Finally it was 7pm, I'm off. Thank the goddess for helping make it through today. Walking to ther alpha office. I knock on the door, but he didn't answer. I'm sure he's in here. I can smell him. I decided to just walk in anyways. I needed my pay. I wanna go home and sleep. Pushing ther door open. I saw him with a blonde bimbo straddling him on his office chair.

"What ther f**k is a dirty rouge doing in your office, love." She said in disgust. "She has a point why the f**k are you in my fuckin office" he roared. "I'm here to collect my pay for the day, I knocked but nobod-" i was cut off with him screaming in my face, " If the fuckin door was closed and nobody answer it, doesn't that mean they wanna be alone, so why THE f**k DO YOU THINK IT WAS OKAY, TO JUST WALK IN", he roared. My eyes widened and I can feel tears threatening to fall out. "I'm sorry, i won't bother you again" turning around wiping my tears walking out. Without him seeing me.