I hate that I love him

How could I have been so blind

Saturday morning comes flooding into my room waking me with a start.

Aiden is sleeping soundly next to me and its not until I move that I feel how sore my scratches are and how much my body aches.

Aiden stirs and tightens his arm around my waist letting me know he is keeping me safe.

When I reach for my phone I see its already past eight in the morning and I know I should get up but Aiden looks so peaceful I don’t want to wake him.

So sliding out of bed as silently as I can I plod downstairs and into the kitchen for some juice letting the refreshing drink quench my thirst.

I hear Aiden before I see him and feel his arms wrap around my body like a warm blanket.

He kisses my shoulder and hums quietly in my ear.

“Good morning beautiful” he sighs swaying me from left to right.

“Good morning” I reply giving him access to my neck to gently nuzzle.

“How are you feeling” he asks making me turn to face him.

“I’m ok, my shoulder is a bit sore and I ache a little” I say looking from him to my shoulder that has deep scratches on it.

“I’m sorry” he says with a sad look in his eyes and kissing me three times in a row.

“Stop saying sorry” I smile,; “its not your fault Daniel was a creep” I reply holding his face with my hands and bringing him in for a deeper kiss.

“What shall we do today” he asks taking my juice from my hand and drinking the rest of it in one go.

“Hay” I sigh poking his side, “that was mine” I add as he hands the glass back to me empty.

Suddenly there is a knock at the front door and we both spin around like rabbits in head lights.

“Let me get it” he says taking my hand and leading me to the stairs.

“Go get dressed” he demands making me hop up the stairs two at a time.

I get to my bedroom door as I hear Lillians voice in the entrance hall.

I cant hear her word for word but she sounded concerned for me.

I get dressed pulling on some leggings and an oversized pink sweatshirt.

Walking back down the stairs I see Aiden has shut the door to his office and that implies he does not want me to disturb them so with out thinking twice I head back up to my room and shut my door as quietly as possible throwing my self onto my bed.

Half an hour later Aiden comes into my room and lays down on the bed beside me.

“How was Lillian” I ask looking over at him laying with his right arm draped over his eyes.

“She’s pissed at Daniel” he replies,; “but more pissed at me” he adds rolling over onto his side to face me.

“You told her about us” I ask in shock.

“I told her I have feelings for you”,; “I guess I wanted to see what her reaction would be” he adds closing his eyes briefly.

“And” I ask hoping its not all bad news.

“She acted just as I thought she would” he looks directly at me and it makes me sad.

“I’m sorry” I say leaning over to kiss his cheek.

“Why are you sorry” he asks with a cheeky grin on his face.

“I don’t know really” I answer him with my shoulders shrugged making us both smile.

He pulls me on top of him and tells me this is why he loves me.

I ask if its my innocence that he loves and he laughs again.

“Well yes that and your smart little mouth” he growls in my ear biting my lobe playfully.

He then carefully strips me of my leggings and sweatshirt kissing me from head to toe.

We make love in every position imaginable, both of us getting more pleasure every time.

I honestly never knew it could be like this, I never imagined letting myself be this relaxed with someone.

After a short nap I wake feeling suddenly very hungry, my tummy making the most disturbing noises.

“Ill go get food” he sighs rolling over and stretching.

“Do you want to come with me” he asks and I know he is worried about leaving me alone again.

“I will be fine” I tell him walking into the bathroom to turn on the shower.

“I could just stay and shower with you” he beams poking his head around the shower door.

“Go” I say pushing his head away.

“I will be back as soon as I can” he yells while I dip my head under the warm running water.

The scratches on my shoulder don’t seem so red now, and I’m lucky they wont leave a scar.

When I’m dressed and my hair is tied up on top of my head I walk downstairs to get the plates and cutlery ready.

I hear the front door open and close with a bang making me jump.

“Is that you Aiden” I shout out into the entrance hall.

I hear heels clicking as they get closer to the kitchen making my heart rate pick up.

Has Lillian come to give me a piece of her mind.

A very attractive woman comes into view and gives me a very quizzical look.

We stand and stare at each other as she places two large suitcases on the kitchen floor.

“I’m sorry who are you” I ask completely rooted to the spot.

“Oh I’m sorry” she holds out her hand towards me and walks forward,’ “I’m Olivia, Aidens wife” and she shakes my hands only holding my finger tips.

My world comes crashing to a halt and I feel like throwing up.

“And you must be Demi” she asks stepping back with a smile on her pretty face.

“Yes” is all I can answer, how on earth did I not know he was married and what is she doing here.

Where has she been for the last six weeks.

“Where is Aiden” she asks look around at her surroundings.

“He has gone to get food” I reply with a strained face, unable to take my eyes from her face.

Her hair is long and blonde, she is slim with large breasts, she dresses immaculately and she speaks with a hint of an accent, French I think.

“I love what you’ve done with the place Demi” she says placing her coat on one of the chairs.

“Thank you” I reply not able to move from my spot.

I hear the front door shut again and wait for Aiden to appear.

When he enters the kitchen he stops dead in his tracks, he looks at me, then at his wife and back to me again, the look of holy f**k etched on his face.

“Darling” says Olivia walking up to him to kiss his cheek.

Aiden puts the bags of food on the table and wraps his wife in his arms.

“What a nice surprise” he says looking at me over her shoulder with pure dread in his eyes.

“I have to go get ready” I say walking away from the kitchen and on to the bottom stair., because right now I will do anything to get away from them both.

“Demi would you join us for food” asks Olivia standing in the door way making me stop to look at her.

“Oh no its fine Mrs Jeffries” I smile sweetly wishing the ground would swallow me whole.

“Oh please call me Olivia” and with that she turns back and walks out of sight.

I walk up the stairs feeling totally betrayed, the tears already sliding down my face.

How could I have been so blind, how did I not see the signs.

Because there weren’t any that’s why.

I grab my case from my closet and place it on my bed.

I have got to get out of here, and quick.

Aiden bursts through my door and comes to my side.

“Demi I’m so sorry” he says grabbing hold of me like I would just forgive the misunderstanding.

“Don’t touch me” I sneer refusing to look him in the eye.

“Demi she has been gone for months” he pleads with me to listen.

I snap my head to look at him.

“And what Aiden” I snap with venom on my tongue.

“And that makes it ok for you to do what you done” I ask in total shock.

“No that’s not what I’m saying” he sighs and looks up at the ceiling.

“Demi please just let me explain” he asks the question like he deserves my time.

When the truth is he does not deserve anything from me.

I finish packing and close my case.

“Demi please don’t leave” he begs placing his hand on top of mine.

“What and stay here playing happy family’s” I laugh,; “or maybe we could have a threesome” I joke, “f**k you” I spit feeling more angry and betrayed than ever before.

He closes his eyes as I yank my hand away and walk towards the bedroom door leaving him standing alone.

I walk down the stairs and to the front door only turning when I see Olivia come from the kitchen.

“Oh Demi thank you so much for everything” she smiles walking over to me where I stand wishing it was all just a bad dream.

I give her a weak smile as Aiden walks down the stairs towards us.

His movements slow and depressed.

I don’t look at him, I just open the door and leave.

Once in the elevator I begin to sob, I have to keep it in check until I can find a hotel for the night, because no cab driver will pick up a blubbering mess from the side of the road.

Climbing in a cab I ask to be taken to a hotel that’s far away from here.

The Cab drops me off outside the Glazier Hotel and I walk inside with a heavy heart.

“Please could I have a room” I ask the receptionist who smiles at me politely.

“We have one double room left” she smiles asking me if I would like it.

I nod and pay the bill wondering how long my money will last now I’m on my own again.

The room is clean and bright, It smells of clean linen and vanilla ice cream.

I collapse on my bed and curl up into a ball, crying myself to sleep.

When I wake I forget for a brief moment where I am and then I remember and the tears begin to flow.

I see I have over twenty missed calls from Aiden and over thirty Text messages asking me where I am, If I’m ok.

I throw my phone down and head for the Mini bar that’s in my room.

I gulp down a mini bottle of vodka letting it burn my throat.

I start another and walk to the window that looks out over the city streets below.

I feel helpless and in total despair.

Ive been here at the hotel for three days now, and I can honestly say I don’t remember at lot of it due to the alcohol and I know its only a matter of time before I’m asked to leave, after all its a hotel not a hostel.

I look through the adds for apartments in my price range and throw the paper when I see nothing.

I desperately need a job so I also look for paid work, I don’t care what I do as anything will do for now.

I call a few interior design companies but they wont give me a chance, so pinning my hopes on a Home department store I call the number for the add.

After a few minutes talking they accept me for an interview when I tell them I worked for Lady Jeffries.

So the next day I head into town and wait to be seen by the home decor departments new manager who goes by the name of Gregory Heston.

“Miss Monroe” he smiles holding out his hand for me to shake.

He’s a kind looking man with a warm sense of humour, he puts me at ease straight away.

He’s very interested in the work I done for Lady Jeffries and asks if I have any Photos of my work.

I show him what’s on my phone and he smiles when he sees the marble statue.

“Such a beautiful piece” he smiles and it makes my heart ache.

He offers me the job there and then which makes my heart leap, maybe this is the start of something wonderful for me.

He takes me down to the home decor department and introduces me to Jenny who is the supervisor, she gives me a warm smiles and shows me around.

“So where are you from” she asks as we walk among the rows of curtains in all kinds of fabrics and colours.

“I was living with Mr Jeffries while I made his apartment a home” I say trying not to sound to sad.

“But now I live in a hotel because apartments around here are way out of my price range” I stop at some blue fabric and think of Lady Jeffries.

“Well I don’t know if you would be interested but I have been looking for a room mate now for some time”,; “and well you seem pretty cool” she says with a big smile.

“Oh my god, That would be fantastic” I reply grabbing her hands and then saying sorry.

“It’s ok, we girls need to stick together” she states giving me a wink.

We say our goodbyes and I tell her I will call by with my stuff tomorrow afternoon to which she agrees and hands me her address.

Packing my suitcase I look around the room before I leave, “its been an adventure room” I say looking around one last time at my super soft bed,; “but all good things must come to an end” I add walking out of the door and closing it behind me with a click.