I hate that I love him

You need to leave

We spend the day chilling in each other’s company, lounging on the sofa talking.

He talks about his mother and father, about taking on the family business and being there for Lillian when she suffered a nervous breakdown, something I never new about Lady Jeffries, but then why would I.

Standing in front of the mirror I don’t look like me anymore, my hair is long and shiny, my skin is pink and glowing, my nails have grown and are now painted a pale pink.

My clothes are decent and I have more than one pair of shoes now.

Aiden stands behind me and whistles.

“You look beautiful Demi” he walks over and wraps his arms around my waist.

“It’s just a little black dress” I reply Looking at my reflection in the mirror.

“Well I think you look beautiful” he says again making me glow on the inside.

The drive to Lillians is just under half an hour and when I see her house for the first time I’m speechless.

A long sweeping drive takes us up to the front steps and giant oak doors stand proud at the top looking down upon us.

Aiden walks around the car to meet me and I instinctively reach for his hand, but when the oak doors open and out steps Lillian all elegant, Aiden steps away from me leaving me felling hurt.

“Aiden darling” calls Lillian from the top of the steps.

“Hello sister” he says all playful.

I walk behind him like a little sheep following its master.

“Demi sweetheart” she calls after she has kissed Aiden on the cheek.

“Hi” is all I can manage, I feel totally lost now as to how to act.

“Come, come” she says holding out her arm to welcome us inside.

The inside is incredible, with a fancy staircase that starts from the middle and forks off both ways to the top.

The floors are white and cream marble and I can see my own reflection they are that shiny.

We are escorted into the dining hall where we all take our seats.

“You remember Daniel don’t you darling” she says looking at Aiden.

“Yes Daniel, how the hell are you” he replies like he is seeing his buddy from way back.

“And who is this delightful creature” he says coming over to me and looking at me with f**k me eyes, he instantly gives me the creeps.

“This is Demi” Aiden replies placing his hand on the small of my back sending shivers through my body.

“Well hello Demi” he says taking my hand and kissing it lightly.

I smile and say hello, but he really does make me feel uncomfortable.

We take our places and I’m most upset when I’m placed next to Daniel and not Aiden.

“So Demi hows the apartment coming along” Lillian asks me from across the giant table.

“I would say almost finished” I look at Aiden when I say it, and he knows exactly what I mean.

“That’s wonderful” says Lillian giving me a bold smile, “so what’s next” she asks sipping her wine.

“I guess look for an apartment of my own and find another job” I reply picking up my own glass.

“I think we could find you some extra work” says Aiden smiling, but his smile is forced, he looks mad.

“That’s awfully kind of you, but I cant stay with you forever now can I” if he looks mad then he should see how I’m boiling on the inside.

“Well when you think its time to move on just let me know” Daniel says touching my arm gently.

“I know of two beautiful apartments over on the Mount that have stunning views of the valley” he says still holding his hand on my arm.

Aiden hasn’t taken his eyes off me the whole time.

“That would be great, thanks” I smile putting my other hand on top of his.

Aiden takes a big gulp of his drink.

We eat dinner with general chit chat about work and politics, well Aiden and Lillian talk work while Daniel asks me about where I’m from.

“I lived down town before staying with Aiden” I reply picking at my food.

“And is there a boyfriend” he asks making Aiden and Lillian snap their heads in our direction.

“There was a man” I smile, “but he has real commitment issues” I look from Aiden to Lillian and smile, I can see Aiden clenching his fist on the table.

“Sweetheart they will do that over and over if we continue to let them” says Lillian leaning forward across the table.

“Not all men are bad Lillian” Daniel calls across the table at her.

“No they are not” I say looking at Daniel who is just loving the attention.

Just before desert I excuse myself to go to the bathroom.

Aiden stands at the same time saying he will show me the way.

We both leave the dining room with a false smile on our faces.

“What the hell is that all about” he says grabbing my upper arm and pulling me towards a corridor that leads to a bathroom.

“I have no idea what you mean Aiden” is my reply when he opens a door and basically throws me inside.

He closes the door and locks it.

We stand staring at each other not speaking.

He steps closer and I put my hand up to stop him but he swats it away like a fly making me gasp.

He he grabs my throat and kisses me with all he has, the feeling of him close is doing funny things to my insides.

He spins me around to face the mirror and lifts my dress.

He snaps my underwear off my body while I cling to the sink for dear life.

“Spread your legs” he breaths into my neck making me obey his command.

I hear him unzip his pants as he bends me forward and enters me from behind.

He holds me with one hand on my throat and the other on my hip, the feeling of his hands on me in such a way turns me on like nothing I have ever felt.

He is grunting into my hair as I try to keep my moans from becoming to loud.

He stops and turns me around to face him.

He is breathing hard, but the look in his eyes is more than lust, its the same feeling as me.

He grabs me between my legs and inserts one finger inside me.

“This”,; he breaths “this is mine” he slides his fingers over my sweet spot drawing me close to the edge of losing it.

He removes his finger and places it to my lips, I feel the wetness from my own juices.

“Open your mouth” he demands, his lips inches from mine.

I do as I’m told and open my mouth.

“Now suck” he commands putting his finger against my tongue, and I do as I’m told.

“This pretty little mouth of yours” he says almost with a sneer, “is mine” he adds removing his finger.

He kisses me again, this time with more need.

He then lifts me up on the sink and thrusts deep inside me again making me cry out.

I’m so turned on it takes only a few seconds to lose control, and as I do this he too lets go growling into my hair.

This has to be one of the hottest moments of my life.

We rejoin the dining hall and because Lillian and Daniel are in a heated discussion they don’t seem to notice our arrival.

When its time to leave we say our goodbyes, with Daniel kissing me on my cheek and whispering how much of a cute couple we make, this makes me blush.

I feel Aidens hand on my back as if to say step away, but I ignore him and carry on the charade and letting Daniel linger far longer than needed, besides he knows there is no hope for him now.

Lillian kisses both of us in turn.

“We must get together when Olivia gets back” she looks at Aiden with such love in her eyes.

“Demi if you ever need anything then please do call me” she says as she kisses me lightly on the cheek.

We leave and its not until we get into the car does Aiden give me the silent treatment the whole way home.

“Who is Olivia” I ask as we pull up to the apartment.

But Aiden is in no mood to talk.

We ride the elevator silently to the top.

Once inside the apartment I ask again.

“Who is Olivia, Aiden” but he still wont speak to me, only marching upstairs and into his room, slamming the door in anger.

I kick off my shoes and stomp up to my own room, I too slamming the door shut.

I pace my room shredding my dress from my body.

I stand in just my bra as Aiden ruined the second pair of underwear this week.

My bedroom door springs open and there stands Aiden in his pants with no shirt,

I fold my arms completely forgetting how naked I am.

“Get out” I yell walking over toward him with full intentions of slamming the door in his face.

“Like f**k I will” he shouts coming inside the room, and picking me up with ease.

“Get off me” I scream as he throws me on the bed.

“Aiden get the f**k off me” I scream louder, but he does not listen.

He pulls down his own pants and take me at force, filling me with need and want, his moves aggressive and almost painful.

I beat on his back calling him every name I can think of until I run out of steam and he slams his lips on mine.

It’s like he is kissing me for the first time all over again, the feeling is intense, so intense I feel the tears prick my eyes and I know there will be no stopping them.

When he reaches his climax he falls on top of me like a dead weight.

My sobs are the only thing that makes him look up.

“Demi”, he tries to touch my face.

But I cant stop crying and I’m angry at him for making me fall in love with him knowing he does not feel the same.

He rolls off me and wraps me in his arms.

I have no energy left in my body and I feel exhausted from all this back and forth emotions.

He gets up and walks to the bathroom, I hear the water running and I know he is running me a bath.

He comes to the side of the bed and lifts me up into his arms.

He walks me to the bathroom and lowers me into the bath.

It’s warm on my skin and instantly soothing.

He leaves but returns a few minutes later with a glass of wine.

I sip the wine and close my eyes.

“I’m so sorry Demi” he says these words like he has said over a handful of times, words I no longer believe.

I look at him with my red puffy eyes.

“I don’t believe you Aiden”,; “I will not be your dirty little secret, and I will not let you tell me who I can and cant talk to”,; “you acted like a child tonight” I close my eyes again and look away from him.

“Your right”,; “I did act like a child, and I’m sorry” he replies stroking my shoulder lovingly.

“Truth is, I have these deep feelings for you”, this makes me look at him.

“And I don’t know how to deal with it”, “Demi, I think I’m falling in love with you”, he looks at me for ages, and I believe it to be true.

“So why act the way you do towards me”,; “why not tell your sister about us” I ask confused.

“She wouldn’t approve” is his reply making me sit up.

“But she likes me” I say wondering what’s so bad about me.

“Aiden I don’t understand” I add putting down the glass of wine.

“I wish I could explain Demi, she wouldn’t understand”, he is not making things any clearer for me.

“Aiden your not making sense” I reply standing up and grabbing a towel.

“What wouldn’t she understand” I ask folding the towel around my body.

I can see he is struggling to say what’s on his mind.

“She wouldn’t understand why I would want to be with someone who” he stops and looks at me running his hand through his hair.

“Why you would be with a poor person”

I reply tilting my head to one side.

The room is silent.

“And you don’t want to tell her about me because you will look bad”, why didn’t I see this before.

That’s why he wanted me to remain his dirty little secret.

His sister wouldn’t approve.

“Demi its complicated”,; “please understand” he pleads trying to touch my arms.

“No you understand” I say snapping my body away from him.

“I’m done”,; “you hear me”,; “either you tell her about us or I walk away” I say turning and leaving the bathroom.

I walk to my bedroom door and open it.

Aiden walks over to me with his hands in his pockets and his head hung low.

“You know for a family who will do anything for charity, you have no clue how to be decent human f*****g beings”, I give him a look of f**k you.

He leaves and I slam the door behind him.

I’m not upset or mad, I’m calm and collected, which is a bad thing because it means I no longer give a f**k.

.