Okay, so gather ’round for the tale of the greatest social disaster to ever happen in my life—or honestly, maybe anyone’s life—when I told Maya I heard disembodied voices. Yeah, brilliant f*****g choice, I know. 10/10 would not recommend. We were having one of those “deep mental health” conversations because, get this, Maya’s brother actually has schizophrenia and hears voices too. A serious subject, right? Perfect time to drop the bombshell: “Hey, I hear voices too.” Spoiler alert: that was the single worst idea I’ve ever had. And that includes some epic fails, so trust me, it’s bad.
The minute those words escaped my lips, I swear the air got heavier—probably because Maya instantly thought I’d confessed to being a ghost whisperer or something. Her face twisted like I’d just told her I c
