To Kiss My True Memories

CHAPTER 5

Chapter 5

"Thanks coz, sinamahan n'yo ako." Gem shouted as we arrived at the bar she wanted.

When we entered, I quickly covered my ears using my palm because of the noisy. People were already a mess while dancing. I can smell also the various smells of smoke from the cigarettes, alcohol and many more.

Gem was jumping while clapping her hand. Masayang-masaya sa nangyayari at nakikita like it's her life while me and Sheeme watching her laughing. Yes, Gem already asked Sheeme to come with us. Hindi na kailangan pilitin dahil gusto niya rin naman.

I don't remember myself inside the bar when I'm in France that's why I want to go home right now.

"Come on, let enjoy this night!" Gem shouted again.

"Let's party and enjoy the night." sang-ayon sa kaniya ni Sheeme.

Napa make face na lamang ako. I hope it's easy to have fun in this kind of place? Hayystt.

"Ohh Kairra, don't frown in front of me. It's one of my happiness. Let's just enjoy." Gem chuckled.

"Whatever." I rolled my eyes. "I hope you reserved a table."

She smiled at me widely. "Yes of course. What the use of my money." pagmamayabang niya.

"Let's just go there na ngarod." pag-susungit ko.

She wicked at me. "Okay, then."

May isang waiter na agad kaming sinalubong at giniya para sa isang tingin ko ay pangmamahalin na VIP room. What I shouldn't expect from Gem, she have a lot of money, though.

Pagkalapag pa lamang ng isang mamahalin at matapang na alak ay nagsalin siya, nilagok ito ng agaran. She took a deeply breath and put another liquor on her glass then she gulped in again on one switch move.

The fudge! What's her problem?

"Gem, dahan-dahan naman." saway ko.

"Just drink, coz." she winked. "Drink more Sheeme..." baling niya sa ka Sheeme na nagsasalin na din ng alak sa baso niya.

"Yeah." Sheeme said as she drink on her glass.

Nanliit ang mata ni Gem na bumaling sa akin. "You too, Kairra!"

I sighed while rolling my eyes. I don't have plan to drink.

"Come on coz, just drink." pilit sa akin ni Gem.

"Drink Kairra, it's taste good." ganon din ang opinyon ni Sheeme.

Umiling-iling ako. "Later." sabay ngiwi ko.

"Ohh come on, Kairra. You're not kid anymore." maarteng si Gem.

"Alam kong natikman mo na ito, and you like it, K." Sheeme smiled.

My forehead scowled. "I didn't remember I like that..." I pointed out the bottle of liquor. "Or just taste any kind of liquors?" sabay kibit-balikat ko.

"That impossible." namamanghang si Sheeme. "But I know you already taste some liquors—"

Gem suddenly cut Sheeme off. "Come on, Sheeme, let's just dance to have fun. Hayaan mo na diyan si Kairra.

na mag-inarte" Gem shouted then get Sheeme hand to pulled her in the crowded dancefloor.

Naguguluhan man si Sheeme, sumabay na lamang sa gusto ng aking pinsan. Hindi na nagawang umangal.

They leave me alone in the exclusive VIP room. In front of me is a lot of hard liquor. Sa pamamagitan ng salamin ay nakikita ko ang mga taong masasayang nagsasayawan sa dancefloor. One blink and a sudden memories returning and showing in my mind...

I saw myself dancing in the crowded dancefloor, nakikisabay sa ibat-ibang indayog ng tugtugin. Seem like I also escaped from my own cage?

It's like a deja vu. This scene is familiar, something I had already experienced before but I can't proof if it's true? Iyong tipong naaalala mo pero alam mong hindi mo pa nagawa.

The fudge!

I felt my heart beat too fast. Mabilis akong tumawag ng waiter na nakaantabay sa amin, bahagyang hinahabol ang hininga dahil sa alaalang hindi alam kung saan nanggagaling.

"W-ater please." utos ko, still catching my breath.

Pinakalma ko ang sarili dahil sa pagkakalito sa mga nangyayari. Tiny pieces of sweat were began to form on my forehead. Maybe it's just nothing, wala lamang ang mga pumapasok na alaala sa utak ko. It's just only a stray memory!

Pero kahit anong pilit na amining wala lamang iyon ay hindi ko mapanatag ang aking sarili, ang aking isipan, ang aking puso. I couldn't calm myself because of that memory.

Is it true? Or I'm just imagining that scene?

"Ayos ka lang, Miss?" nahihiyang tanong sa akin ng lalaking Waiter habang hawak ang tubig na pinakuha ko.

"Yup." I smiled at him a little, pinipilit kong winala ang mga pumapasok na alaala sa aking isipan kahit hindi ko magawa.

It's so hard to take it away from my mind!

Pagkatapos ko ngitian ang waiter ay mabilis na siyang umalis sa aking harapan. I remained quiet while sitting alone in the VIP room waiting for Gem and Sheeme. Wala na bang balak na bumalik ang dalawang iyon? It's boring. I've nothing to do kaya naman nagmuni-muni na lamang ako habang tahimik na sumisimsim sa hawak kong baso ng tubig, I feel my hand a bit shaking while holding the glass of a cold water.

I'm here, setting a bit nervous because of that scenario. Kabado ako, sa aking loob ay may takot na nararamdaman. Takot na hindi ko maipaliwanag. I couldn't calm myself down because of this feeling I couldn't name.

Taging ang mabibigat ko lamang na bugtong-hininga ang gumagawa ng ingay sa tahimik na VIP room kung nasaan ako, nakatulala na tila naglalakabay ang aking isipan sa kung saan. I wonder where's my cousin and Sheeme now. Why they left me here alone? Half hour already passed but still they didn't come back. Why Gem bring me here if she will just left me in a big VIP room! Wala akong magawa dito kung hindi ang tumunganga.

I sighed heavily to wake up myself. At para hindi tuluyang makatulog ay nagpasiya akong magtungo sa CR upang kahit papaano ay mawala ang pagkakaantok ko.

Tsk! Sana'y hindi na lamang ako sumama sa kay Gem!

Pagkalabas ko sa VIP room ay rinig ko ang napakaingay na kanta galing sa DJ na sinasabayan ng mga sayawan at hagikgikan ng mga tao. Why some people want this kind of life? I wonder if everyone who came in this place makes themselves happy. Maybe, they go in this place to forget their problem just for the mean time? Or maybe this is the life they are used to be — to have fun every night?

I guess so...

"Excuse me po." mabilis na napabaling sa akin ang nakatayong waiter dahil sa tawag ko. "Where's the cr po?" I asked.

"Po?" he scowled, mukhang hindi narinig ang sinasabi ko.

I pouted. "Where's the cr po?" mas malakas kong tanong.

"Ahh sorry po, Miss." hingi niya ng tawad. "Samahan ko na lang po kayo."

"No, it's okay. I can go alone, ituro mo na lang."

Napatango at napakamot siya ng ulo. "Pagkalampas niyo po ng dance floor kanan po, tapos deretso lang po sa hallway hanggang dulo."

"Thanks." saad ko ng makuha ang sinabi niya.

Hindi ko na inantay pa ang sasabihin niya at dumeretsyo na sa daan papuntang cr kung saan madadaan ang mga taong magugulong nagsasayawan sa dance floor. Is there any other way? I guess no more na!

I round my eyes tryna finding Gem or even Sheeme in the messy dancefloor, but it's too hard to find them. Siniksik ko ang aking sarili sa daanan patungong restroom kahit pa ang iba ay nabubunggo at natutulak na ako dahil sa kanilang pagsasayaw dahilan para umangat ang suot kong black na skirt.

I groaned when someone accedentally hit me. Masakit iyon lalo na't sa kaliwang tagiliran ko tumama. Kumunot ang noo ko sa naramdamang sakit.

"Opsss, girl umiwas ka kasi." saad ng babaeng nakabungo sa akin at tumawa pa ito.

Suminghap na lamang ako at hindi na pinatulan pa, at bago siya tumalikod at bumalik sa pagsasayaw ay pinag-ikutan niya pa ako ng mata. The fudge! What's wrong with that girl?

Sa inis ko ay mabilis akong naglakad ng papadyak.

The fudge! She's at fault pero siya pa ang nagagalit? What the fudge? Maybe, people here was used in that kind of accident. They don't care about others, they've their own world.

I started walking in the dark hallway towards the comfort room, the irritation what happened recently still in me. Hindi ko na madinig ang maingay na musika dahil malayo na sa parte ang CR. Pumasok ako sa may nakasulat na ladies at padabog kong binuksan ang pintuan ng isang cubicle, hindi na inintindi kung meron bang ibang tao sa loob. Luckily there's no one, I'm only here.

Until now I'm still pissed because of that girl. Nang matapos na sa isang cubicle ay hinarap ko naman ang salamin. I watched my forehead furrow, traces of irritation. One rolled my eyes before calming myself down.

I watched my reflection through the mirror. I'm wearing a white off shoulder spaghetti blouse partnered on my black sneaker skirt while my shoes is a simple low black heels ankle strap sandals. I also applied a light make-up on my face to add colors, that's Gem suggestion, though.

Napatulala ako ng ilang sigundo sa salamin habang tinititigan ang sarili, I don't know but everytime I'm alone there's something bothering inside of my chest. There's something feelings I couldn't understand.

I just sighed before I decided to go.

I go out in the comfort room silently, ngunit nakakailang hakbang palamang palayo ay may humigit na akin. Napatili ako dulot ng pagkabigla at sa sakit ng pagkakahawak sa aking braso dahil sa biglaang ginawang paghila sa akin ng kung sino. I could clearly see who dragged on me because this part of bar was dark.

Tiny pieces of sweat were began to form on my forehead down to my cheeks. Kumalabog ng malakas ang dibdib ko dahil sa takot. One screamed came out from my mouth again when the unknown person pushed me on the wall. I closed my eyes firmly, that's the only way to endure the pain on my back.

It's hurt!

"L-let go of m-e!" nanginginig kong pakiusap.

Fear engulfed me when I realized na walang ibang tao dito maliban sa akin at sa strangherong lalaki na ito, madilim pa sa parteng ito. My eyes begin to form a tear because of the nervous and panic I was feeling. I never felt this too scared before.

"D-don't touch m-e." pag-mamakaawa ko.

"Oh, it's okay, we're only two here." saad niya sa malaking boses.

I don't want to open my eyes, I don't want to see him. I'm scared. Amoy ko ang halimuyak ng alak sa kanyang paghinga. Napaatras pa ako when he started touching my hair downwards but I'm already on the wall, wala na akong maaatrasan pa.

Fudge!

Mahigpit niyang hawak ang dalawa kong kamay na naka-pako sa dingding. I don't know how to avoid his touch. Hindi makapag-isip ng maayos ang aking utak dahil sa takot at nginig na nararamdaman. My eyes started watering like it was only the things that I can do right now.

"No! don't touch m-e!" hikbi ko, nanginginig sa takot. "L-et me g-o! L-et me go, please..."

He let out a loud of laughter dahilan para sa mas lalo akong matakot. "Not so fast. We're not done yet." he whispered on my ear, creepily.

I continue shaking my head saying that don't want what he was doing while the tears on my eyes fell down quickly. Habol ko ang aking hininga nang maramdaman ko ang paglapit ng kaniyang mukha sa aking leeg. Inipon ko ang aking lakas upang magpumiglas dahil sa mahalay niyang pagkakahawak sa aking braso, ayaw ko iyon! Dahil sa ginawa kong pagpupumiglas ay napatingil siya but he tighten more his hold in my arms that I feel the pain on it.

"Bitawan mo a-ko! Walang hiya ka!" sigaw ko sa kaniya. "Tulong!" I shouted so loud.

Kahit na humihikbi sa takot ay nakaya ko paring sumigaw ng sumigaw para makahingi ng tulong, but I guess there's no one can hear me dahil ang parteng ito ay malayo at hindi rin dinig dahil sa maingay na dulot ng DJ.

"Oh, I guess you want some room?" he asked while laughing then he began to bring his face near mine.

Nagpumiglas ako sa pagkakahawak niya. "No... Bitawan mo ako!" at dahil sa pag-pupumiglas ko ay nasampal ko siya.

Natigil siya at nakakatakot na tingin ang binaling sa akin, galit. "Tang na ka! Alam kong gusto mo ito kaya magtigil ka." gigil niyang saad.

Umiling ako. "B-itawan mo na ako!" hagulgol ko sa kaniya sa pagmamakaawa.

"Don't try to fight." he shouted on my face angrily. "You're mine and no one can see to us here! Tigilan mo na ang kakasigaw mo! Walang makakaring sayo dito—"

He didn't finished his words because in a one swift motion he was already on the floor. Someone punched him! Nabuhayan ako ng loob dahil doon, ngunit ang kaba at takot ay hindi parin nawawala sa akin.

Sa isang galaw may mabilis na humawak sa aking braso at mabilis akong nilagay sa kaniyang likuran. Bumilis ang t***k ng puso ko na para bang tumakbo ng milya milya kahit na hindi naman. And it's the same feelings when I saw the man in our restaurant— The son of Mrs. Mizelle. And he's the only person who can make me feel this way.

It's Mr. Dela Torallez?

"Fvck you! Sino ka!?" pagalit na saad nang lalaking nasa sahig, iniinda ang sakit sa mukha.

"She's mine, stupid." the man in front on me said using his baritone voice seems saying that his every words have an authority, no one can defy on his words, and because of that I confirmed that the son of Mrs. Mizelle and the man who's holding my arm right now were the same.

I get it on his serious and baritone voice. I remember his baritone voice!

What he was doing here?

Tila nagising ang lalaking nasa sahig dahil sa kaharap niya ngayon. He laughed irritatedly.

"Also?" tanong nito pagkatayo, bahagyan pang tumatawa.

I remained quiet, didn't know what they talking about.

"Yes." mabilis na tugon ng lalaking humahawak sa aking braso, slowly nilakabay niya ang aking braso pababa sa aking kamay, he then hold my hand seems he was scared to let me go.

I then felt a soft bang in me.

The man in front of us laughed. He laughed angrily. Ngunit sa tawa niya ay bakas ang kaniyang takot doon.

"I get her first!" iritadong saad ng lalaki sa aming harapan. "Ibigay mo siya sa akin."

"She's mine." seryosong saad ng lalaking may hawak sa akin.

Nakuha pang tumawa muli ng lalaking nasa harapan namin. "You've already many girls there. They isn't enough? She's mine dude, I get her first." the man in front of us said angrily while looking the man who was holding my hand.

Kahit madilim ay nakita kong bumaling ang galit na mata ng lalaking nasa aking harapan sa akin. He smiled at me creepily as he started to stepped towards me.

Nagsimula nanamang kumalabog ng malakas ang aking dibdib, I stepped once backward as I closed my fist firmly, holding back my nervous.

"N-o..." I whispered, so scared.

The man who's holding my hand turned to me. His eyes was too soft while I couldn't read what's in his mind. I quickly bowed my heat when our eyes meet, I then feel his hold on me tighten.

The man who's holding me remained silent as well as the man who's in front of us. Matagal ang katahimikan na bumalot sa amin. Unti-unti ay nag-angat ako ng tingin at kahit madilim ay pansin ko ang matagal nilang pag-tititigan bago umiling ang lalaking nasa aming harapan at walang pag-aalinlangan na umalis. Nagulat ako sa biglaan at walang pasabing pag-alis ng baliw na lalaking iyon but it was a relief for me, though.

The man who attempt on me left us. Mr. Dela Torallez still holding my hand while silence engulfed the both of us and I can only heard my deep breath. Ilang minuto ang katahimikan sa pagitan naming dalawa, word didn't come out on my mouth. First of all I don't know what to say? What happened lately and now didn't sink in on my mind, it was all fresh na para bang ayaw ko pang paniwalaan.

Tinitigan ko ang kamay ng lalaking nakahawak parin sa akin. Kahit hindi ako nakatingin sa kaniya, I know, I feel him staring at me intently, like he was examining me?

Mabilis kong hinigit ang aking kamay sa kaniyang pagkakahawak, umatras din papalayo sa kaniya. At nang binalingan ko ng tingin ang mukha niya ay bakas doon ang gulat dahil sa ginawa ko. I then bowed my head, can't look at him now.

I bit my lower lips. I don't know what the words I might say — Thank you? Should I thank him right, for saving me?

Ang malakas na kalabog ng dibdib ko ay nagpatuloy. But it was not the same noong kaharap ko ang baliw na lalaki. It was different! I'm nervous but I don't know why. I can't even lifted up my eyes to look at in the eye the man who's in front of me — maybe I'm shy because of what happened earlier? But my heartbeat saying it was not about it.

My heart saying about something...

"Are you okay?" his baritone voice asked.

I know it was for me but I didn't answer him. I bit more my lips just to keep my mouth quiet.

Nakayuko ako at tumango na lamang dahil hindi pa din kayang magtaas ng ulo para tignan siya. Ang paraan ng tingin niya ay tila ba unti-unti ako nitong tinutunaw. I can feel it.

I heard him sighed. "You want to file a case against him?"

I shook my head quickly and I scowledz though my head was still on down. What he was saying? Alam niyang hindi gagana iyon dahil nasa bar kami at bukod doon ayaw kong mag-alala pa si Gem at baka makarating kay kuya Aldwin at kay tito Amer ito.

I don't want to bother them about this.

I heard him sighed, again. "Okay." ramdam ko parin ang paninitig niya sa akin. "Let's go back there, maybe your cousin and friends was looking for you now."

I nodded but preventing not to give him any glance. I feel his stared, it was darted on me like he was waiting for me to look at him back. Ang kalabog sa dibdib ko ay hindi ko na maiintindihan dahil sa sobrang lakas. I don't know how to describe this sort of feelings!

"Walk first. I'll escort you." he then said seriously.

Though, I want to steal a bit of glance at him I prevent myself cause he was still staring at me. I calm myself for a seconds before I began walking. I walked slowly to sense if he was doing what he said, at nang maramdamang nakasunod siya ay sinimulan ko ng maglakad ng mabilis.

"Next time you go to the restroom at least called a friend to come with you." he said softly while we're walking, his on my back.

Isang tango lamang ang tinugon ko sa kaniya. He was right, though. Pero kasi I can't find Gem. Hindi ko na lamang isinantinig pa dahil rinig ko pa rin ang malakas na kalabog ng aking dibdib na sa tingin ko ay rinig niya rin sa sobrang tahimik ng paligid.

Bakit ganon? Though, he was on my back but I could still feel that he was staring at me, tila kita niya ang mukha ko kahit na nasa likod lang naman siya? Nanatili akong nakayuko kahit pa naglalakad. Binilisan ko nalamang ang paglalakad hangang sa marinig na ang malakas na musika. Nasa dance floor na kami.

"Speaking of Darrow, he's here." I heard one of the girls says while dancing on the dancefloor.

They stopped from what they doing and looked on my back. Huminto rin ako sa paglalakad pero hindi na sumulyap pa sa likuran dahil kuha ko na kung sino ang pinagmamasdan nila. Sino ba naman ang hindi titingin sa kaniya?

He has a massive figure, thin lips, thick eyebrows, peaky nose plus he's Adam's apple. At additional pa ang kaniyang simpleng pananamit but it suits to him. Kahit hindi ko kita alam kong akma iyon sa kaniya. Gaya noong nagkita kami sa restaurant. He dress up well, indeed.

By the way, his name was Darrow?

It's nice and fit to him, huh — But sounds too serious, I don't like it... just a little bit.

"Wanna dance with me?" kahit hindi sila kaharap ay alam kong tanong iyon ng isang babae para sa kaniya, using a flirty voice.

I rolled my eyes, irritated. Siguro'y hanggang dito na lamang siya dahil mayaroon ng nag-aayang makasayaw siya. I guess he was the type of man who doesn't reject the invitation of women, huh. Pero may umaasa sa akin na hindi siya sasama sa anyaya ng babae.

You're punk, Kairra! Why you need to hope!?

I should keep walking but I'm desperate to hear his answer that's why I remained standing here — but instead to hear his answer I heard another words from him.

"Continue..." he said softly.

I don't know if it was for me or for the girl that wants to dance with him.

It's doesn't matter! I just continue walking while rolling my eyes. Minadali ko ang aking bawat hakbang at tumigil lamang ng malapit na sa VIP room na kinuha ni Gem. I then saw my cousin Gem and Sheeme inside.

Bago ako pumasok ay pumihit ako palikod at malapad na dibdib ang sumalubong sa akin. Sa gulat ko ay napatalon ako. What the fudge!

Slowly, I up my eyes while I barely stepped once backward because the man in front of me was too close. Halos dumikit na ang aking mukha sa kaniyang dibdib. Hindi ko kinakaya dahilan upang magsimula nanamang pumintig ng mabilis ang aking puso. The fudge!

"You okay?" he asked, dahil siguro'y nabakas niya ang gulat sa aking mukha.

"Y-eah." I said using my small voice as quickly bowed my head again.

I thought he already stopped walking just to dance with the girls on the dancefloor. But I was wrong.

Nakayuko ako at hindi parin makatingin sa kaniyang mga mata. Sandaling katahimikan ang bumalot sa amin bago ako nagpasiyang magsalita. I closed my eyes first to get some courage to speak now.

"Huh, t-hank you... for saving me." sambit ko at kasabay non ay ang pag-angat ko ng tingin. "H-uh, Darrow — Am I right? You're name is Darrow?" kabado ako ngunit nakuha ko pang makapagtanog.

Tumaas ang kilay niya at nanliit ang matang tumitig sa akin. "Yeah. Do you like my name?" paos niyang tanong.

I bit my lips. He save me and I don't want to lie to him. "Hmmm... Actually, I don't like your name, just a little bit." sambit ko, napangiwi.

"Yeah, you don't really like my name, huh." he murmured that I couldn't get clearly.

"Huh?" I asked.

He just nodded. "Pasok ka na." aniya, nilahad ang daan papasok sa aming VIP room.

I scowled while staring at him for a while before I nodded and smiled at him a little at tuluyang pumasok sa loob. Naabutan ko ang dalawa na nakasitting pretty at mabilis akong sinalubong ng tanong ni Gem.

"Where have you been?" hindi pa nakakaupo ay tanong niya na.

"CR." tipid kong sagot.

"Who's with you?" sunod na tanong niya.

Napataas ang kilay ko sa tanong niya. "I'm alone."

"Ba't hindi mo ako tinawag?" she asked hysterically.

I just shrugged. "I can't find you."

Umarte ako na para bang walang masamang nangyari sa akin sa CR kanina. I don't want her to worry, it was already done naman na.

She then stopped asking me because of my lazy answers. I don't have any plan to tell to her what happened on me earlier. Bored akong umupo at hindi na pinansin pa ang mapanuring mata ni Gem. Sheeme is still quiet while drinking a hard liquor.

Nahanap naman ng mga mata ko ang aking pinagpasukan at nagulat dahil nandoon pa din si Mr. Dela Torallez, I mean Darrow Dela Torallez, his name was Darrow. Darrow huh!

Darrow, hmmm.

Darrow Dela Torallez.

Stop it, Kairra! I thought you don't like his name? But you keep saying it on you mind! You punk!

Pinaikot ko ang aking mata at agad na tumama ito kay Mr. Dela Torallez — I mean Darro, at naramdaman ko nanaman na bumilis ang pagpitik ng aking puso. Deretso siyang nakatingin sa akin, napaka seryoso ng mga mata niya. I can't read his expression! For a moment, he stay standing there while watching me but later on he turned his back and walked toward in the direction I didn't know.

One deep breath I unleashed before my heartbeat back on my normal heartbeat as he finally gone on my sight.