Palette! And Shades

Episode 8

“Did I do something wrong?” Kuu asked, unable to move a muscle after Akuji left him. Murase wiped his tears as well and Kuu helped him on the piano seat. He looked drained.

“No you didn’t. Thank you for making her realize that she isn’t as horrible as she thinks she was.” Murase said, smiling at Kuu as he gasped for air, trying to stop crying. Kuu couldn’t see if he was happy or sad or both. “I thought I devised a perfect plan, sorry for dragging you here, Kuu, Camie.”

Kuu didn’t know that there was someone behind the door as they spoke. She didn’t look like a spy because she clearly had no reason to do so. She was a freshman by her looks and tears were streaming down her cheeks.

“I’m sorry sir, I couldn’t do anything.” The girl said, her hands trembling. “You must be Kota-kun. I’m impressed that you became close to her and that she didn’t drive you away.”

“Why would she do that- er- why is she traumatized?” Kuu asked in a different manner than his usual bubbly and cheerful personality as he offered her a seat. The girl flinched at the sight of his seriousness.

“I guess I should really tell you what happened back then.

Camie's POV

It was exactly two years ago since she came and joined our team- which was yet to be named and we were set to debut after finishing middle school. The senpais and I thought that everything was okay because we managed to make her open up to us. We knew all of her secrets, and she knew ours in return. We were a group that was set to be successful, and Mr. Murase here was our former coach.

We thought that Akuji was just like us-

but she wasn’t.

Whenever we trained as a group, she excelled in everything- she was multitalented, and her performance skills were far superior than us. Her singing was so beautiful that all of us faded in the background whenever we sung together. Her dancing was so graceful that after a month, she became out of our reach- and we all became wary of her.

The senpais treated her like the same whenever we were together- but they spread rumors about Akuji when she was not around. I can understand them- because they trained all their lives- and a person who did not have experience came and crushed them.

Akuji was treated badly- but the company- especially the head treated her well and defended her against all odds.

However, the senpais and me- especially- became so angry that we confronted her, the actions which made her quit the agency, and turn away from music. Little did we know that we created our own demise, for having her leave because for all the days she was gone, we repented. And her smiling face when we confronted her haunted us. Sooner or later, our consciousness fed up on us, and we all quit, leaving everything behind.

We kept close contact to each other- and trust me- we tried to search for her- but we all failed in the end because she never wanted us to see her again, considering that she believed that she’s the one at fault for the disbandment- but it was the reverse. It was our fault. We destroyed her- and then, we heard a rumor from one of the trainees that saw her that she stopped doing music and was never planning to do it again.

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“And that’s basically it.” Camie said and shot an apologetic look at Kuu and Murase who cried more as he remembered everything that happened. Kuu didn’t like what he heard, telling himself to calm down and think happy thoughts.

“Kuu.” Murase called, concerned about what was happening with him but Kuu was displeased and ran away to not let them see that vulnerable side of him.

[How could human beings stomach those deeds?]

[I hate them. I hate them]

[I hate this.]

[why does she have to suffer?]

[ I never knew]

[I was insensitive]

[I hate this!]

He ran as fast as he could and climbed down the stairs- his footsteps clamoring on the halls of their school and tears made his cheeks wet. Some students looked at him, worried because he was famous for always smiling and having a very outgoing personality that everyone loved.

He went to the new music room and tried opening it but failed because it was already locked. He tried to breathe in deep to relax and stopped for a while. In that instant, he knew that he was losing control- but a certain view made him gasp and ran as fast as he could again.

The gymnasium’s door was opened- though there was no guarantee that she was really there, Kuu made a bet and ran towards the door, wrangling it wide open and dashed inside it, neglecting the trips he experienced and the sweat that streamed his skin.

He was panting heavily and was searching the entire hall.

To his surprise, there was no one inside- but just as he was turning to leave, frail notes started to sound at the walls.

Kuu froze at the sound he was hearing. It was so familiar that it calmed him down.

He followed the sound and he went towards the wooden stage where the audition was held, listening intently- figuring out that the only piano there was the black one on the backstage.

He knew exactly who was playing it.

“Stop there. Don’t come.” A voice said, making him stuck on his track- though the playing didn’t falter.

“Akuji.” Kuu said and walked silently, touching the curtain beside the stage. “It’s me, Kuu.”

Somewhere inside him felt like he softened the instant her voice came- his calm went back and he was able to think straight again.

“I said don’t come.” Akuji suddenly slammed the keys- but she continued playing in an aggressive- no- sad way.

“I won’t” Kuu answered and placed the curtain back to its place- then sat on the stage. “But I won’t leave.”

“Do what you want.” Akuji said and continued playing a very sad tone that rang bells in Kuu's ears.

“So I’m not f*******n to talk if I do what you want, right?” Kuu said and approached the wall that divided the stage and the back, then leaned on it. However, Akuji just played the sad tone. “Did I hurt you back there? I know I did, I’m sorry.”

There was a loud, aggressive F-note that rang on his ears. Kuu looked at the curtain that divided them sadly, worried about her.

“Let me tell you a story, Anony- no- Akuji. When I was a kid, I wasn’t really an outgoing person. I don’t know how to deal with people, I don’t know how to play sports, nor music. I was ordinary- though, I still am, today.” Akuji’s playing softened, and she listened to him. “There was this time when I was in elementary school fourth grade, a transfer student came on the second day of October- and as you can guess, in that tender age, I fell in love.”

Akuji continued playing but it was somehow softer than before, and Kuu smiled.

“There was this music room in that school where a black piano laid bare, and I would always come there during mornings to listen to someone play it. Her sound was so happy I always cried every single time I heard her- and her face whenever she played was so beautiful that even the sun or moon or stars could never compare to her," Kuu continued, smiling at himself for remembering a distant memory he will never forget as it was already engraved in his heart. "And you know what? I would always look at her in class, but she didn’t seem to notice me, so I tried being noticeable. I studied hard, I learned music, and sports. However, one day, she never came back to the music room again, and for all I know, she transferred school again. I was too heartbroken.”

“It’s funny how you fell in love at such a young age.” Akuji answered and laughed, making Kuu happily smile so wide and cry because of happiness.

“It is, really, but I think it’s funnier how the world works. That kid, I forgot her name throughout the years- but her music, that, I didn’t because I memorized it, and after I learned music, I transcribed her work and played it-” Kuu stood up and came backstage, but Akuji didn’t flinch. He took a chair and sat beside her, started pressing keys, and he completely accompanied her in her song. “the song you are playing is the one she always played. Akuji, all this time, I’ve been waiting for you- so how dare you ask me why I’m not disgusted. Of course, I’m not!”

Kuu played harder as he remembered how Akuji attacked herself a while ago. She didn't stop playing as well, but the sound he was seeing looked blue, and black, she almost smelled his sadness as metallic as well.

“How dare you badmouth the person I admire the most- how dare you say that to the person who started my dream! Those people who made you do this to yourself; I can never forgive them.” Kuu played, but Akuji stopped as her hand trembled- Kuu continued either way.

“I-I d-did… start your dream?” Akuji asked and tried her best to continue playing. “D-did I not destroy you like I destroyed them?” Kuu stopped playing and held her hands.

“You built me, Akuji. You built me. You are a blessing, not a curse, so stop hiding your face like this because you-” Kuu said and lifted her hair, revealing her beautiful face- but Akuji closed her eyes thoroughly and looked away. However, droplets of water came to her face; she looked up at him, and saw that he was crying because of happiness, “are the most beautiful spectacle I have ever seen.”

Akuji, deprived of love and hope, suddenly saw light in his eyes. She never wanted that moment to end, and little by little, she blushed so hard and she cried happily, surprised as she found happiness in another human being.

“Thank you, Kota.” Akuji said and threw herself on his embrace- however, Kuu did not act well in that because he lightly pushed her away; Akuji seemed dejected but it was all because Kuu was smelly for running the stairs- and the backstage wasn’t well-ventilated. When he saw how sad Akuji became, he immediately went to her and hugged her- and Akuji hugged him back, making his heart flutter.

“Let’s get out now. People might interpret this the wrong way.” Akuji said, but a flashing of a camera caught her eyes, making her blink multiple times.

“Hey you Kota-baka- I acted without your permission and took a picture so I wouldn’t help you on the thesis- but you should still include me.” Josef said, letting them see the picture. Akuji went to him and tried snatching his phone, but the two boys were enormously too tall and she failed to touch it.

“Finally- a wallpaper! Kyaahh! I’m so happy! I’ll do your essays and I’ll include you at the thesis without even helping!” Kuu said and looked at Akuji. “May I have your contact details, Akuji?”

“F-fine, I guess.” Akuji replied and gave him her number; and Kuu sent her all their pictures together, making her blush. “You- Why do you have these pictures?”

“Hey- I waited for you all my life so I’m creating a record of us so you wouldn’t be erased from my sight again.” Kuu said and took her phone, making their recently taken picture her wallpaper. “Ah- it looks good!”

“Shut it.” Akuji said, trying to hide her red face and ran away from the gymnasium; but a thought about her bag made her stop her tracks and Kuu ended up taking it from above.

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