Hitting Rock Bottom

Chapter 13 Depression

Malachi's POV

I'm surprised by her reaction as I shove the note into my pocket and get the bartender's attention to pay the bill. I quickly square the tab as I walk out behind her.. but as I get out from the building, I notice her car is leaving the parking lot and swaying the entire way. This worries me completely as I jog to my bike, hopping on by swinging my leg over as I hear from besides me. "Hey d*uchbag, stay away from Yvette!" Before I even know what's happening, let alone look in that direction.. I feel his fist makes contact with my cheek, throwing my face to the side. This action catches me off-guard as I instantly glare over to see her ex.

I reach for him, gripping his shirt as I tug, pulling him over and into me stating, "You had your chance and you f*#ked it up.. you got the divorce you wanted, now go f*#k all the stupid b*tches you see fit.. But.. she is single, an adult and can make her own decisions.. now I need to go make sure she is ok since you upset her and she is now driving drunk. Get the f*#k out of my way, before we have an actual problem." I state shoving him to the ground.

I rev my engine as I zip away from the bar leaving him in my dust, with rocks flying all around as well. I smirk to myself loving that effect from having my fast going bike. That reaction of the rocks against him wasn't intentional but nice for my state of mind. It's a way to get back at him without doing something that will get me in trouble.

I try to concentrate on the situation at hand as I speed as much as I can to try to catch up to her, I just need to make sure she is fine.. I'm feeling the alcohol too, but not as much as I'm sure she is. She is way smaller than me and made a comment about how she doesn't really drink, plus going hand to hand with all of her emotions helping with her buzz and exhaustion.

I get to her place, seeing her car is partially parked on the sidewalk, but at least she got home. "Yvette." I say to her as she waves me off, continuing to walk away. I slow my bike down to almost a stop, as I look up to see she is stumbling up her stairs. I quickly park and try to run to her aid. "Yvette." I say again but no response at all.

I'm approaching her with a loud jog trying to make sure she hears me as she is getting into her place. The door is swung open wide enough that I'm able to slip in before her door shuts, so it shuts right behind me. She is not saying a word to me and stumbling through her house, kicking off her heels and throwing her purse onto the counter. She is not acting as if she knows that I'm here and now I'm questioning being here.

Should I make my presence known or should I leave before she figures out that I'm here? I would hate to freak her out, make her think she is not safe around me. Or that I would take advantage of her drunken state and that's not me by any means.

But.. Not trying to sound like an assh*le.. maybe this could be my opportunity to steal those stones when she doesn't know I'm here. Doing exactly what Mr.Sanders said, putting business before feelings so there aren't any bad reprocussions.

I would hopefully solve this problem to get it done and over with since I mostly needed to get into her house to take care of this.. but, for me personally, the biggest issue is, what if she catches me? Than that would be it for anything I want with her.

At the same time, I don't even know if she likes me and she is probably not looking for anything, since she just got divorced. So there is probably nothing coming of this anyways, So I'm probably thinking too much into this.

And come on how can I possibly resist the fact that I am already in here and could solve this issue with the boss, pretty quickly to make sure that nothing happens with my family.. Then I could have all the time I want with Yvette afterwards, if she even wants that. I turn around to leave because I'm scared of freaking her out, when she probably thinks she's alone.. then turn back around liking the idea of solving this issue. I'm torn in both directions, not knowing what to do.

The sound of her sniffles and tears is all I can hear to bring me out of my deep thoughts. I observe her as she stumbles through her place, she continues on down the hallway and I slowly follow her. It's dark outside and in here.. luckily my eyes are adjusted to the dark already, so it's not a huge deal that she hasn't turned any lights on.

I watch as she abruptly stops and looks up at some pictures hung on the wall, then cries more, shaking her head and mumbling. She takes a frame into her hand as she throws it to the ground shattering the glass and frame. She takes another than another chucking them at the wall one after the other. I watch as the glass flies everywhere but she obviously doesn't care.

Since she hasn't turned on any of the lights, she is just letting the little nightlights guide her through the whole house. So that makes things easier on me to hide off to the side while I'm deciding what to do next.

I look around noticing she really doesn't have much in here. Normally when I have robbed rich people they have expensive items displayed all around the house to show off their expensive taste. But there's nothing really here just some pictures hung up in each room.. that's it. They don't have rich taste and that surprises me.

I watch her turn into a room and I can't help but follow down the hallway as I approach the room she has just entered. I look in and observe her unbuttoning her jacket as she slides it off then throwing it onto the bed. This exposes her arms because apparently her undershirt is a spaghetti strap, but I had no idea with her jacket over the top. Her hair sways with every move she makes, making this sad scene almost beautiful as she gracefully moves across the floor to her bed. She flops down on top of the bed, holding her face as she cries more. I don't know what to do to help, but I want to do something. I wish their was something that could make her feel better.

The scene before me is clenching my heart, looking more depressing than I ever thought. The darkness consumes everything in the room except for the little bit of moonlight trailing in. I glance around noticing the beautiful huge glass doors that lead to the balcony. You can see the moon through it, bringing in the only light she has allowed so far.

She sits up on the bed as she continues to cup her face and mumbling more between all the tears. The only words I can clearly make out is her saying over and over again, "I'm a regret and waste of time.. no one wants me." I hate hearing these words coming out from her mouth. There is a part of me that just wants to declare to her that she is worth it and I want her.. But that would probably completely freak her out at this point. So not helping, but making things worse. That's the last thing I want.

My attention is caught as I watch her stand from the bed as if in a trance, walking to the dresser and pulling the top drawer out. She stares down into it for a moment, then takes a skinny metal box out. She keeps staring down at it in her hands before letting out a deep breath.

I notice her turn around, taking it to her bed, then sitting right back down. After placing the box on her lap, then running her fingertips over the edges. She let's out a deep breath, then using a small key to open the box. She keeps staring at it as she wipes away tears, but I can't tell what it is.. It looks like a portable safe box.. but that could have anything in it, maybe even the stones.

I lean, but I can't see what's in the box so I lean out a little more, as I take another step forward to get a better view.. but this makes the floor squeak loudly. I freeze and hope that she doesn't see me here being a creeper. I don't want to upset her more.

She looks over to the side where I'm at, then shakes her head and looks back down. She glances over again but still not saying anything. I can't tell if she sees me or not. But what she pulls out of the box makes me stay frozen, just in case.

It's a handgun and I know this for sure because the metal reflects from the moonlight. She holds it tight looking at the details as her fingertips trace over the edges of the gun. She opens it up just to slip the bullets in slowly, one by one. She points the gun out in front of her as if she would use it on someone. I just hope that someone is not me.

She let's out a deep breath before turning the guns barrel to face herself. She squints as she holds it out still pointed at herself. Is she going to try to kill herself?! I don't know what to do without freaking her out.. But I can't let her do this to herself. I look over at her and see her hands shaking as the tears run down her cheeks.

I step towards her as I watch her put the gun down and into the box again. She is gasping for air and shaking her head as she wipes away her tears. Obviously having an internal battle with her sorrows.

I stand in place not knowing if I should expose myself now that she has put the gun down. She does some quick breathing, making it sound like some sort of breathing exercises to pump her up as she quickly takes the gun again pointing it at herself. Her eyes squeeze shut as she groans out then putting the gun back down. She can't do it.