Why I'd Rather Be Wrong

Chapter 8, Part 5: Confrontation

Jaze D'Angelo

     "f*****g tell me where the heck is he?!"

     There was Flynn, aggressively pinning down Cassius by the neck on the table, and Cassius was obviously in pain but didn't even try to resist nor show any form of aggression or attempt of vengeance. I quickly ran towards Flynn and pushed him away from Cassius.

     "What the heck's wrong with you?!" I yelled at him.

     The people in the restaurant immediately walked out, in fear of being involved in the current situation.

     He pointed his finger at Cassius that just got up "That guy's responsible for poisoning your mind and you're still being protective of him? Is this what you truly are now? You're choosing him over us?"

     "It's because we're the same! We understand each other, he understands me, unlike you. Why don't you ask yourself how are you so deserving to be chosen?" I confronted him and he was left speechless while still glaring at Cassius.

     He patted his sleeveless denim jacket as if there's actually dirt on it "So, you're not going home tonight?" he asked, calmly.

     "Home?" I chuckled, sarcastically. "Sorry, being around that house doesn't feel like home anymore. You just gave me another reason why it's better for me to move out of that house. I love you guys, I really did, I treated you like my actual brothers. I'm actually thankful that this happened, your true colors sprouted, each one of you."

     "Alright, fine, hate me, but don't include the other guys, they still care about you," he replied then already turned his back on me and walked away as if nothing just happened.

     And that's that, I do have a homophobic friend. He said that the other guys still care about me, so that means he's excluded, he doesn't care about me anymore.

     The manager walked out and stumbled upon the scene, and saw that the customers have already fled "Look what you've done to my business!" the manager yelled while still in his apron.

     "I'll take care of it, sir," Cassius replied and sat back on his seat, trying so hard not to show himself catching his breath.

     We're already back in his car, I told him I'll drive for him because I figured it might be a little difficult for him to drive after what happened earlier, he just let me anyway. He's just sitting peacefully, with his hands wrapped on his neck while he leaned his head back against the headrest.

     "Are you okay?" I asked, pretty concerned about what my friend did to him since this is low-key my fault actually. I had the urge to ask even though it bothers me somehow.

     "Yeah, I'm fine, I'll live," he replied neutrally as if it doesn't really bother him. "Your friend's pretty rough. First time being choked after a while now."

     I squinted my eyes while I focused on the road, confused. He's clearly trying to tell something but I just couldn't pick up. "What do you mean? Are you getting choked on a daily basis?" I asked sarcastically yet cluelessly.

     "Nevermind, you're clearly entering something new, you're mind's still fresh," he said.

     "Yes, it's so freaking fresh, it's because you don't tell me things yet."

     "My only tip for you is to see and explore for yourself," he said then glanced at me.

     I smirked "Nice tip, truly inspirational," I mocked.

     We already reached his house, I parked right in front of his house as he said. He grabbed the paper bag of the sweets he bought earlier and we already went out of the car. We went inside together and it looks like he's already feeling a lot better, that's a relief. I placed my bag on his couch and immediately laid down like I just got home from a very exhausting day.

     "You do realize that I have a guest bedroom for you, right?"

     "It doesn't matter," drowsy, I replied. "Your couch is so soft...and wonderful...and comfy, I'd rather sleep here," I said, and I feel like my eyes are starting to become so heavy that I don't even wanna open them and just let myself fall asleep already.

     After a while, I woke up, I opened my eyes and I'm in a dark and small room while I'm still laying down to something, some sort of bed that is attached to the wall. I was certain that I am dreaming but there's nothing I can do to snap out of it, yet. I got up under the sheets and I'm wearing some kind of hospital gown that's excessively long, it almost conquered my torso and lower body.

     "Let me out! Let me out!"

     I walked towards the steel bars and perceived what's going on outside. There I stumbled upon another cell right in front of mine, in which the ladylike scream for help came from, from a man that's grasped onto the steel bars, begging for freedom. He gazed upon me, and all I saw was nothing but horror. He tried to hide in the shadows as he saw me staring at him trying to hide what he became in this awful place.

     "They told us we were resulting ourselves to something unnatural, embracing sins for our own sake, and yet what they do to us was much more very inhumane, they're the ones that deserve to go to hell," he spoke while remaining himself out of sight.

     "Can you tell me where am I? And what happened to the both of us?" I curiously asked.

     He chuckled "Young man, they may have already done something to your mind, you're already clueless about how cruel this place is. The world despises us, that's why we're here, in the place where they think we could change, the damn conversion therapy center. You're here because someone brought you here, it could be your family, because they want us to change, and abide by what's natural and according to what they believe is normal," he said, and from the voice he emitted, I could sense him holding back the pain, the tears, the trauma.

     "Why? Why are they doing this to us? What do you mean that we're unnatural?"

     "It's because we're homosexuals, they said a man shouldn't be with another man, they said it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. That's why we're here. They're trying to change us as if this is something truly reversible, a choice that is changeable," he said, and I heard him chuckle sarcastically.

     "What did they do to you?" I asked as I sat on the ground, and there I saw him also sitting on the ground while leaning against the wall.

     "There are so many things to enumerate, and I don't wanna ruin your freshly reset innocent mind. All that I can say is that they'll do everything -" he suddenly stood up and looked at me in the eye while furiously grasped onto the steel bars "They'll do everything to destroy who you are and what you wanna be in this cruel world!" he yelled and I suddenly stood up then backed away.

     I just sat on the hanging plank, my bed, and just tried to perceive everything for a moment. I heard large footsteps thudding in the hallway. I immediately laid down and acted like I was asleep but I kept my eyes staring outside and a couple of masked people stopped right in front of my cell.

     "Wake up, your last session has come, patient 402," one of them stated, and I heard keys jingling as if they're already opening up the gate of my cell. They've already walked inside and I just kept my eyes closed. Suddenly, someone carried me and laid me down on a bed that has wheels and embarked on taking me somewhere while I still played dead. "It's all gonna be alright, you'll be alright..." said someone, the same voice from earlier. Then I felt them covering me with a blanket, I opened my eyes halfway and one of them noticed me and immediately moved their head closer to me which startled me.

     I suddenly snapped out and woke up into reality as I opened my eyes and there I saw Cassius looking down at me while I'm asleep, in his pajamas.

     "Who are you talking to?" he asked, curious yet concerned.

     I sat properly and realized he covered me with a blanket, and it inadvertently added detail to my dream. I'm still catching up, trying to perceive what just happened to me in my dream, trying not to lose it. I'm already dripping, despite the fact that the air conditioner was on ever since we came back here. He sat right in front of me and just stared at me. "I was...dreaming..."

     "About?"

     "I woke up somewhere, some type of prison, someone in my dream mentioned that place was a conversion therapy. I don't know, I feel like something about me recalls that place as if I've been there before, but I'm clueless. It's like a deja vu, but very bizarre," I explained while I avoided eye contact with him, since his gaze will just make me feel more uneasy. "And there's this one guy, like a patient in that place, he's been begging for freedom, he said that place is for changing homosexuals as if it was something we could actually change."

     "Yeah, that's what conversion therapies are for, yet it doesn't actually do anything but destroy one's self as they're forcing them to lie with their own selves," he replied, visibly showing that he's speaking with his own words as if this is something he's familiar with.

     "It's just weird because it kinda tries to imply something about me..."

     "Well, as far as you know, you've never been there, right?" he asked, and I just nodded. "Dreams doesn't actually refer to mostly everything, some are just purely random and nonsense, so don't make it such big of a deal," he said, then already stood up. "You sure you don't wanna stay in a room?"

     "Yeah, I'm fine here, don't worry, thank you though, for letting me stay here," I replied along with a smile.

     He smiled back, and that's that. He already walked upstairs and headed to his room. I noticed that he dimmed the lights down here, he made the lighting very cozy which is so relieving for my eyes. I just laid down while I'm trying to think about what might happen tomorrow. Because ever since my friends knew who I really am and the thing between me and Cassius - I could no longer imagine what would happen tomorrow since my life before was just repeating over and over.

     I guess I'm just gonna go with the flow, as always...