Fated to be together or not [COMPLETED]

I only want Alex

Nicolle:

He pulled me into a kiss, and it was heaven. His kiss was so passionate, I forgot myself in it. I could feel his love, his anger, his passion, his request all in this single kiss and then he asked me if I did not like it.

“No.”

He pulled back and took a knife in his hand. Please Alex don’t do something stupid. And then he pushed the knife into his hand while keeping it against the wall. The knife nailed down in the wall along with his hand and he was laughing.

I rushed towards him and pulled the knife. He hissed in pain and all I wanted to do was hug him. But then he pulled his hand back and closed the fist. I can’t see it anymore.

“Then I guess there is no need for me to stay here.” He said these words and started walking towards the door. I looked back at him and he stopped.

“If you ever considered me anything in your life even for a second, please Nicolle I beg you. Is there something else going on? Please tell me if there is something which I should know about. I refuse to believe that you don’t love me. Please Nicolle. I want the truth. I am begging you for my love. I Love you Damn it. I love you like crazy. I will die without you.”

Here is the man I love more than myself, begging in front of me. And all I can do is go towards my room. I can’t see him like this. He is a strong man but look at him now and it’s all because of me. He hid his pain all these years from his family and has tears in his eyes now because of me. I made him weak. He needs to go far from me.

I heard the door slam and I dropped on the floor crying my eyes out. My heart is hurting, I am unable to breathe properly because of the sobs but I can’t do anything else.

The pain is killing me, and I hate to think what Alex must be thinking about me. He hates me now, that’s for sure. Please God, let him reach safely. I can’t even ask him, but I can contact Alan. I went downstairs to pick my phone and sent him a text.

“Alan, can you please call me once Alex is back? He left in a rage and I am worried about him.”

I am waiting for his reply and looking at the house again. It’s a mess. The kitchen, living room and exit has blood all over. My Alex’s blood. I don’t want to imagine his pain. His mother hates him, doesn’t care about him even if he is hurt and now his wife has shown him that she doesn’t care about him either.

He was hurt mentally, emotionally and physically. I am sorry Alex. I screamed and sat on the ground. I cried until I passed out.

“Nicolle, Alex” I could hear my Mom shouting and then I heard some footsteps running towards me. I don’t have any strength to even look at them.

Mom took me in her arms. “Everything is finished Mom.” I hugged her tight and started crying again.

“I will kill Alex if he is the one responsible for this.” I heard my Dad. He was about to call Alex and my Mom was busy scanning me for any injuries. They are thinking Alex hurt me. What a joke.

“Please Dad, it’s not his fault. Mom, I am not hurt, he is. He was begging me to accept his love. He fell on his knees crying and all I did was leave him crying in the hall. I rejected him, Dad. I rejected him.” And I hugged my Mom back. “He is injured and left for Seattle and I didn’t even tend to his wound. I am a heartless person. I hate myself.”

My Dad sat near me and kept his hand on my head.

“I will not ask why you did that, because you must be having your reasons. I just saw all this blood, and then you were lying on the ground. I thought he hurt you or hurt your baby. Although I agree, he told me he loved you before you went on this trip. He told me he wants to confirm if you also love him. I just got scared for my daughter. My anxiety got the best of me. But I have seen love in his eyes for you.”

“He told me, not once or twice. But Dad, I couldn’t say yes. Please don’t ask me why.” And I broke down completely. My Dad and Mom tried to console me, but I don’t think I will be able to come from this ever in my life.

I passed out crying and Sia came to check me. Although she asked me to take care of myself, all I can see is Alex, his face, his eyes, tears and then his words. “I am begging you for my love.”

I have no count of how many days have passed. My day starts with looking at the ceiling, then the chair on which he slept one day, then my bed, where we slept together. And when I thought I could no longer cry, or that the pain can no longer affect me, a new memory of us together makes my heart cry.

My heart is broken in so many pieces that I can’t even count them. And I am the one who broke it. Not only mine, I broke Alex’s heart as well. I remember the pain in his eyes and it’s killing me.

It’s not the first time something has happened to me. The drug incident, Jack, the rape, Kevin. But somehow, I managed to come out of them all eventually because deep in my heart, I didn’t love Jack or Kevin. But with Alex, I had started seeing my life with him. I had dreams of raising our kid together, getting old with him.

During my visit today, Sia told me it’s a girl and the first thing that came to my mind was Alex. He was so excited for a girl. He told me he will raise his girl like a princess and a warrior. He will play with her and teach her self-defense as well. My daughter will never get a chance to live all those moments with her Dad.

I am getting blank checks every month from Alex. Dad called him the day I got the first check. I told him; Alex will not pick up the call, but he picked it up. When Dad asked him about the check, I still remember his response.

“I am sorry Uncle; I will keep sending the checks. If she doesn’t want them, she can burn it or give the money to charity, I don’t care. But I will send them every month for my kid, till my last breath. And no one can take this from me, not even your daughter.”

“Not even your daughter.” He doesn’t even want to say my name. This is how much Alex hates me.

So, from the past 5 months, I am getting these checks. I am withdrawing just a few hundred dollars because he is sending it for our daughter. I am also sending the bills to Alex, so he knows what’s going on and is relieved that his daughter is getting it. But I don’t think he is even opening them. I never got a receipt.

He is in the news every now and then. His business is booming, and he is the richest man in the world at this moment, but what I am hearing from the media is bad. He is heartless now. I saw his interviews and he was bragging about some of his takeovers where he forced the other company to sell out their establishment to him. He is arrogant, ruthless and cruel.

Days have passed, months have passed, and I am near my delivery date. I move like a zombie. Emma, Mom, Dad everyone has tried to cheer me up. Even my brother has taken leave from his college so that he can help me. But I don’t want anyone.

I only want Alex.