Chapter One
Hindi natutulog ang siyudad.
Kahit anong oras, may ingay—busina ng kotse, yabag ng tao, tawanan sa kanto, at mga ilaw na parang ayaw mamatay. But for Johan Eryx Vale, all of it felt distant… like background noise he stopped listening to a long time ago.
Nakatayo siya sa balcony ng isang mataas na building, one hand inside his pocket, the other holding a glass of whiskey he didn’t even drink.
Sa baba, buhay ang mundo. Sa taas, tahimik.
“Ang aga mo na naman mag-isip,” isang boses ang sumingit.
Johan didn’t turn immediately. Kilala na niya kung sino ‘yon.
North.
Leaning casually against the glass door, arms crossed, eyes sharp as ever.
“You’ve been standing there for an hour,” dagdag ni North.
“Hindi ka ba napapagod maging dramatic?”
Johan let out a faint breath, almost like a laugh. “I’m not.”
“Talaga?” ngumisi si North. “Mukha kang bida sa pelikula na malapit nang mamatay.”
Johan ignored that.
Instead, his eyes shifted down the street, across the lights, hanggang sa isang familiar na figure sa kabilang side ng building.
Kael.
Nasa baba siya, kasama ang ilang kaibigan, laughing too loudly as always. Kahit malayo, kitang-kita ang saya sa mukha niya—genuine, careless, free.
Parang ibang mundo.
“Ah,” bulong ni North, napansin ang direksyon ng tingin niya. “Of course.”
Johan’s jaw tightened slightly. “Don’t start.”
“I didn’t even say anything yet.”
“You don’t have to.”
North walked closer, sumandal sa railings katabi niya. “Ten years na, Johan.”
Tahimik.
“Ten years kang nakatingin sa kanya ng ganyan,” he continued. “Hindi ka pa rin napapagod?”
Johan finally looked away. “No.”
“Or ayaw mo lang aminin?”
Johan’s voice dropped, calm but firm. “There’s nothing to admit.”
Sa baba, biglang tumawa si Kael nang mas malakas, napahawak pa sa tiyan niya habang tinutulak siya ng kaibigan niya.
The kind of laugh that fills the air… the kind Johan memorized without even trying.
North sighed. “He deserves to know.”
Johan shook his head. “He deserves to be happy.”
“And what if ikaw yung happiness niya?” North asked, serious this time.
Johan almost smiled ..... almost.
“He’s not like that,” he said quietly. “You know that.”
North didn’t argue. Because it was true.
Kael always talked about the future—about having a wife, kids, a peaceful home. A normal life. The kind Johan could never be part of.
The kind Johan would destroy just by being in it.
“Pre!”
A voice called from below.
Kael looked up right at them and waved with that same bright smile.
“Baba na kayo! Ang boring niyo diyan!”
For a second, Johan froze.
Then, slowly, he lifted his hand and gave a small wave back.
North glanced at him. “You going down?”
Johan stared at Kael a moment longer.
“…Yeah,” he said.
Kahit alam niyang bawat hakbang palapit kay Kael
ay isa na namang hakbang papalayo sa mga salitang hindi niya kailanman kayang sabihin.
And somewhere in the noise of the city.
Johan realized—
the loudest thing he carried
was the silence inside his own heart.
