Facing The Past

| Chapter Five |

My Dad was coming home.

I was like a kid in a sweet shop. My Dad was coming home, and we could get him back to full health. He had been in the hospital a week and I think if he didn't get out soon he was going to go insane.

My old man wasn't one for being stuck in a hospital. My phone buzzed in my pocket distracting me, I picked it up with a smile.

"Hey honey, we will be about 2 minutes."

"Ok Mum, see you soon."

I had butterflies; I didn't know why. I guess I was just excited. Nick had cancelled on coming three times and it was getting to me. Was it too much to ask for your boyfriend to be here to support you? With my Dad coming home it perked my mood up.

I heard the car before I saw it, so I ran outside making sure the banner was still in place.

'Welcome home Dad.' It read.

I had painted it this morning, it was cheesy and probably stupid, but I wanted him to see it and know he was where he belonged, back with his family.

My Mum laughed when she saw it, I could see her chuckle when she parked. Running over I helped my Dad out the car into his wheelchair.

"I hate this damn thing." He grumbled.

I knew he would moan about it, he hated feeling useless, he was always doing something and now he just had to sit and deal with rest.

The moaning wasn't going to be over anytime soon.

"Welcome home Dad." I smiled rolling him up to the house.

"Uck Sydney, you didn't need to get the nursery kids to make me a banner." He chuckled.

"Shut it old man. I spend a whole ten minutes on that." He laughed in response.

We got him inside and in front of the TV. He took the remote putting on the sports like he always did. I rolled my eyes.

"Get me a beer Syd." He stated.

"Eh no." I remarked dryly.

"Come on, beer is good for you, I read in the paper it helps brain development." He looked up at me with pleading eyes and I raised my eyebrows.

"You could have come up with a better lie than that." I chuckled.

"Well, I'm not on top form, I've just had a heart attack you know."

I burst out laughing at his serious face, it wasn't long before he was smiling with me. My Mum came out with a glass of fresh orange and my Dad snorted.

"Full of vitamin C." I stated holding in my laugh.

"Full of crap more like." He dismissed taking a drink and getting zoned back into the football.

A frown took my face when I heard a bang outside. My Mum looked at me then to the door with a frown.

"I'll check it out."

I opened the door with a frown. Adrian was on his knees changing my tyre. I didn't speak for several seconds only stared at him.

"You're going to burn a hole through me." His deep voice was matter of fact.

"If only." I joked.

He didn't respond, only continued with the tyre changing it leisurely.

"I was going to bring it in. I've just been dealing with my Dad."

"Sure. Knowing you, you'd have got your Mum to bring it. Thought I'd save her the bother." He didn't even look at me.

I hated the fact that he was right, I was going to ask my Mum tonight if she would take it in and the fact that he knew that angered me. I sighed watching his muscled arms flex as he worked.

"Again, you're going to set me on fire with that stare."

"I'm just making sure you're doing it right." I smirked.

There was a moment of silence as he worked. He then turned to me those piercing eyes staring straight at mine.

"The whole towns been talking about your outburst at the Garage. I've been enemy number one these last few days."

"I'm sorry, did I screw with your perfect image. I'll try to be more subtle next time I have a meltdown." It didn't surprise me everybody knew.

"You're about as subtle as a slap in the face."

"Sounds about right. You know me I tend to get caught up in my emotions." I shrugged.

"That you do."

Again, there was a moment of silence, I looked up at the blue, cloudless sky plucking up the courage to ask what I always wanted to.

"Why did you do it Adrian?"

He stopped working wiping the sweat from his head with his arm. I waited a while as he turned and sat on the driveway. He motioned for me to do the same so walking over I sat in front of him.

"Talking isn't my strong suit."

Rubbing his hands up and down his bare legs they were covered in tattoos, the detail amazing. I would have got lost in them if he didn't speak again.

"I don't want it to come out wrong." His face looked almost vulnerable.

"I just want the truth; I think I'm owed that at least. We had a whole life planned out" I frowned, he nodded in response.

"I got scared. All our other friends were going to college and going to start their lives and it just felt like mine had already been planned. I just felt suffocated. I know we both made those plans but the sooner we came to finishing school, the more the walls felt like they were closing in." He looked away from me like he couldn't say the words directly to me.

"Why that way. I'd rather you just broke up with me. It would have hurt a whole lot less."

"I have no answer for that. We were at the party and you had stayed home because you were helping your Dad in the morning. Mary was talking about how I was never going to have s*x with anyone else and how we could have a onetime thing, and nobody would ever know and well, it happened. It was the worst experience of my life, if I could take it back I would." He sounded sincere and I hated myself, but I believed him.

"I thought if I were reckless, if I done something out of the plan we had I'd get my freedom back. That I'd feel in control again but instead I felt even more out of control. Reality came crashing down the minute I sobered up and by then you wouldn't speak to me, within a few days you had left."

"Do you blame me?" I scoffed.

"No, I just wish I could have spoken to you then, I wanted you to know I was sorry and I really am. I didn't want to hurt you Sydney, I never wanted that."

"I just wish you had spoken to me. Things could have been so different. That whole thing is the reason I don't have a lot of friends, it's the reason I don't trust men. You screwed with me big time Adrian and honestly, I deserved better." I sighed.

"I know." He agreed. "Do you know the irony of the situation?" He asked.

"What?"

"Everything we planned is everything I want. I just didn't know it then. I wanted you, I wanted us to travel, to build a life together and I ended up ruining it all before I even realised."

"Life can be cruel." I nodded.

"Damn right." He agreed.

"Sydney, what was the noise...oh Adrian. How is your Mum?" My Mum trailed off.

"She's good." I turned to my Mum watching the sympathetic look take her face, I frowned.

"He's just fixing my tyre Mum." I filled the awkward silence.

"That's nice. I'll get you a drink son." She disappeared.

"What's wrong with your Mum." I missed his Mum; May was a good hearted person. She wrote to me when we broke up to make sure I was OK.

"Nothing." Was Adrian's clipped response.

"Hm, you were right about that talking thing, you probably should work on that." I stated sarcastically.

"I'll take that on board."

"Is she sick?" I delved.

"I said she's fine." He clipped, turning once again to fix my tyre.

"You know one day you're going to realise how much of a d**k you can be." I was so fed up with his mood swings.

"Believe me I already know, being a d**k cost me you remember?"

I didn't respond I just stood up walking to the door, turning I stared at him knowing he knew I was watching.

"You can check my work when I'm done, give me some space."

I didn't answer because honestly I couldn't be bothered having another fight with him. I just walked inside and sat next to my Dad on the sofa who had fallen asleep. Just as I turned the channel my Dad piped up.

"I was watching that." He stated, "Turn it back."

"You were watching it with your eyes closed?" I asked looking at him, he still hadn't opened them.

"I was just resting them."

"Sure thing old man." I laughed turning the TV back.