No Innocent Love

The Justice

    Daddy went to jail for killing the man who killed mom. It was in no way self-defense, it was revenge. He killed him out of anger and that was all there was too it. He was honest with the police. He got some sympathy, but that was all he got.

    I did end up seeing the lady the man was married to, she was so sad. She cried during the entire trial. She told the judge that she was pregnant and that she kicked him out because she was angry, she just found out he lost his job and they were trying to save up for a crib.  To this day, I can't remember what they said the man's name was, But I'll never forget the lady's name. Alice.

    Alice had a breakdown.  She said she couldn't raise her daughter herself. She kept saying it was her fault, but why? Daddy pulled the trigger and I stood and watched, but she wasn't even there.

    "I didn't go after him, I didn't look for him." She choked on her tears, "That's what hurts the most. I wasn't even there!"

    I don't understand. Why does everyone blame themselves? Do they want to feel guilty? I touched my face with my shaking hand and wiped a tear. Besides, 'Isn't it my fault'?

    It was then I realized. It was no one's fault. We can keep going back to different events that caused this, its no one's fault. But the law punishes the person that crosses the line. But what gives them the right to decide where the line is and when it is crossed? Why must we follow their morals when everyone has their own? No one deserved to die, but it was a life for a life. But now daddy has to spend his in jail. Two lives were taken away from me, my mom's and daddy's.  But what is justice? Is it revenge for family and friends, punishment or protection?

    The reason daddy shot the man was because he killed mommy, it was extreme circumstances that are unlikely to happen again, he isn't dangerous, so it can't be protection. Punishment is to make sure a person doesn't do something bad again, so it can't be punishment because again, it only happened because of the circumstances. That only leaves revenge for his family and friends, but he killed mom, isn't that enough? Then, what is justice? I would do that same thing if I was in dad's shoes. He really loved mom so much. If I loved someone so much and they were killed, I'd be so mad that I would want them dead too then I'd have to go to jail. That made me scared. Fear.

Justice is fear. Now I get it. Justice isn't for the people who already broke the law, its for the people who haven't. Justice is a threat. If you break the law, you'll go to jail. The people who broke a law, like daddy, are just examples. Justice is fear. Justice is a threat.