Chapter 10
1709 Words
I was upset with Jesse. I had not saw him since he broke my date with him. And he had not called to make a new date like he promised he would.
I did not know where I stood with the man these days, and I was annoyed with him. I was at home. I had gotten off work. And I was cleaning my place up. Then I was going to make dinner then watch a tv show.
Nothing much. I check my messages hoping that Jesse was going to call me. But nothing on my machine. Not like I hoped.
Not one word for a date. I sigh as I sit on the couch. Mark had not called either. Maybe he was done with me. Maybe Maggie told him she saw me kissing Jesse at the movies? It was possible right?
♥☆♥
I lean into the couch. My phone rings. I reach over to get it. "Hello?" I answer.
"Skyler can you come over?" begs a worried sounding Stephanie.
"What is going on?" I ask her.
"It is uncle Jesse. Dad is working. Joey is out. And I went to get uncle Jesse for dinner. He said he was going to take a nap. And he is not waking up. I called 911 but they are not here yet. I am scared" Stephanie tells me. "DJ is over at Kimmy's right now. I am here alone with Michelle"
"I will be right over" I breath out. What was going on??
I hang up the phone. Then rush on over to the Tanner's. Stephanie let's me in. I follow her to Jesse's room. He was laying on his bed. Not responding. I check his pulse with my hand. His pulse was racing. He looked drugged. I notice a bottle of pills beside his bedside.
"Jess.... Jess come on" I softly say. "Steph can you step out a moment?" I order her.
She nods then heads out of the room. The doorbell rings.
"They are here" she tells me "I will let them in"
"Jess, Jesse what did you do?" I worry. I touch his cheek. He was clammy. And passed out. Cold. "Jess wake up. Please" I beg him.
"Skyler?" he mutters softly. "I can't take it much more"
"Take what?" I ask him. "stay awake" I beg him.
His beautiful eyes close again.
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"Jess what did you do? What did you take?" I demand to know.
"Miss, we need you to move out of the way" orders someone.
Workers come rushing in. I hear them saying they needed to pump his stomach. They were going to rush Jesse to the hospital. I am floored. Why would he try to kill himself? Why?
"Can you stay with these kids miss?" a worker asks me.
"Of course, I can" I say. "what is going on?"
"He overdosed. He tried to take his life" they tell me. "they are rushing him to the hospital. Can you get ahold of his family?
"I can yes" I say softly. I hug Stephanie and Michelle close to me. I lead them out of the way as they wheel Jess out of there.
At least he was still alive.
"What is happening? What is wrong with uncle Jesse?" Stephanie demands to know.
"Why are they taking uncle Jesse?" asks Michelle.
"What happened?" DJ asks as she comes bounding up the stairs with Kimmy.
"Girls follow me please" I order them out of the way. We watch in the living room as they wheel Jesse out of there.
Danny and Joey come home. I tell them what was going on.
"I need to go to the hospital" Danny worries.
"I can stay with the girls" I offer.
"Thank you" he tells me.
"I will drive" Joey orders to Danny.
♥☆♥
They head out of there.
I go to clean up in Jesse's room while the girls get ready for bed. I notice the half empty bottle of Vicodin pills on Jesse's dresser. I find a handwritten note. I gasp as I grab it. I read it. It was a suicide note. He wrote it.
"Dear family, I can't take it. I am a horrible person. I don't like what I have become. I am not good enough for Becky. Or for Skyler. They deserve better. And you do to. I treat people like a pawn in my game. I can't do this to them. Or me. It is not fair. I am not the man they should be with. They deserve better than what I can give them. I am sorry to the girls. I am not the uncle they thought I am. I let you all down. Jesse" I read out loud.
My hands shake as tears water in my eyes.
"Why did uncle Jesse do this?" DJ asks me. "I know. I mean a friend of mine had killed themselves last year. It was awful" she mutters.
The others were asleep.
"He is suffering from depression" I tell her. "he needed medication"
"They caught him in time" she sighs. "he would have died"
I nod. Tears come to me. "I love him so much. Maybe I should have told him" I sigh.
DJ hugs me. I hug her. Then the phone rings. "Aunt Becky? Uncle Jesse is in the ER he tried to kill himself" DJ is saying on the phone.
"Let me talk to her" I tell DJ. I take the phone. "Becky hi?"
"Hi there, what had Jesse done?" Becky asks me.
I explain it to her. And tell her about the letter to.
"He is selfish! That jackass. He never thinks of the girls. Only himself. Another reason why I tried to dump him along time ago. He wanted to stay dating me and other people. To keep hanging on" she sighs. "He will never let up. Now he makes it to be my fault. So, like Jesse" she bitterly remarks.
I could not believe her. Here Jesse was hurting. And nearly died. She could care less.
"Becky he was upset" I argue. "he has been waiting on you"
"No, he was trying to keep me. You know what tell that man we are done. And you know what else you can have him. He tried to take his life while his girls were there. Wow that is rich" she laughs she then hangs up.
Jesse deserved better than the likes of her. I was furious. Tears water in my eyes for him.
No wonder the man was depressed. It was all because of Becky.
♥☆♥
"What did aunt Becky say?" asks DJ.
"She said to let her know when uncle Jesse comes home" I lie to DJ. She nods then goes to her room. I sit on the bed there. Wondering what to do next.
No wonder Jesse pushed me away. He felt no one wanted him. Or loved him. I loved him. I wanted him. I had to show him someone did. He needed someone. He needed to see he was worthy of love. To be loved in return. He had so much to live for. Tears water in my eyes.
The girls were asleep. DJ fell asleep on my lap as we watched MTV while we waited for Danny and Joey to get home. Danny carries DJ upstairs to bed. I sit with Joey to wait to talk to them both.
"How is he?" I ask them.
"He is awake. But not talking much. He was embarrassed" Joey explains.
I hand Danny the note I found. And the bottle of pills Jesse had taken.
"I am going to go see Jess while I can." I tell the guys.
"What about Becky?" asks Joey.
I tell them all what she said.
"What a b***h" Danny grumbles as he shakes his head. "just like her to say that"
I nod. "I am going up to see Jess" I say.
I head to the ER. They allow me to see him. I go in and he was resting in bed. I sit beside his bed. Then take his hand in mine. I kiss the top of his hand. I brush his hair back from his eyes.
♥☆♥
"Jess please never do this again. You scared me to death" I softly tell him.
Tears water in my eyes. His eyes flutter open as he looks over to see me.
"Skyler?" he asks me.
"Hi" I say.
"Why are you here?" he wonders.
"Jess, why would I not be?" I tell him.
He looked ashamed. "I don't want to talk" he mutters.
I squeeze his hand in mine.
"That is okay. I will" I tell him. "I read your note. I found you"
He says nothing.
"Jess, I know Becky hurt you deeply. And you think you are unlovable because of her actions. But you are so wrong Jess. You have so much to live for. Those girls adore you. You are their whole world. They lost your sister. They depend on you. They love you so much" I point out. "You know what else? I know we have had our up's and our downs. And I have to wait on you. But you have not run me off. Not at all Jesse. I am your friend. I care deeply for you. You can't push me away" I warn him. "Not at all"
"Even after all the horrible things I did? How I chose Becky over you? I hurt you?" I hear him say.
"That is in the past. Yes, it hurt. I understand why it happened. I do not like it. But I understand" I tell him. "I want to be with you. Sometimes you have to work at what you want. And I am just a girl who is willing to work for it" I admit.
His eyes finally meet mine. Then he yawns and closes his eyes. He was sleeping.
"Please never do that again Jess. You scared me so badly" I softly tell him. "What would we do without you?" I ask him. I brush his hair back again. His soft dark feathery hair. I wished he was in love with me. And cared for me this way. Not enough to take his life for me. But to care.
I lean in kissing his cheek. "I am not going anywhere" I whisper.
I meant what I said. I was not easy to get rid of. Not when it came to something I wanted. I wanted Jesse. I wanted him to love me in return. And if I ever got that love there was no way I would ever let his love go.
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