TAMED SERIES 3: RAFAEL AVILA

Kabanata 6

Caya

I wasn't able to move to another cabin since all the other rooms are already occupied. Pero dahil technically ay sina Astrid at Croft naman talaga ang gumagamit ng kwartong katabi ng kay Rafael, iniiwasan ko na lang ding mag-stay roon kapag daytime nang maibigay ko sa kanya ang "peace" na hinihingi niya kapalit ng pagprotekta niya sa akin.

I would normally explore the ship. Good thing I wasn't active in showbiz for several years due to what my mom and Crystal did to me. Kaya kahit may mga pinoy sa barko ay hindi ganoon ka-hassle.

They would ask for pictures and autographs but they do not go so all-out like what my fans do back in the country so I am really having a lot of time to explore without worrying if someone will recognize me.

"How's their massage?" Astrid asked after we met up in the casino. Ngayon ko lang iyon mapapasok dahil hindi naman ako mahilig sa sugal. Astrid, on the other hand, used to work at a casino as a card dealer when she isn't an esteemed actress yet so she knows how to play.

"Great. Pero the best pa rin 'yon Thai massage na sinubukan natin before sa Phuket." I looked around. "Are you gonna play pocker?"

Astrid shook her head. "We can just try the slot machines. Saka na ako maglalaro ng poker kapag kasama na natin si Croft. He used to play with his friend's money back in the days just so he could get inside the casino."

I smirked. "Hindi naman siguro kayo nandadaya?"

She giggled softly. "Silly. Of course, not. Eh 'di wala na akong trabaho kung mahuli? Iyon pa naman ang main source ng income ko noon. I loved the tips. Kasi kapag malaki ang tips, nakakapag-date kami sa resto ni Croft at maagang nababayaran ang rent kaya tuition fee na lang niya ang iniintindi ko."

Kumunot ang noo ko. "You paid for all of that?"

"Hindi ko ba nakwento?"

"Hindi mo naman siya kinikwento noong hindi pa kayo nagkakabalikan. Halos galit na galit ka nga kapag may nagbabanggit ng pangalan niya before," I said.

Bumuntonghininga si Astrid. Maya-maya ay hinatak na ako patungo sa slot machines. We took our seats and then started playing while she tells me about their past. Ngayon ko naiintindihan kung bakit ang laki ng pinagbago ni Astrid kumpara sa bersyon niyang una kong nakilala.

Yes, she was nice but there's something about her back then. Parang gustong sumikat dahil may galit sa puso. That was her biggest motivation. Napapansin ko iyon dati dahil sa speech niya tuwing may nakukuhang awards.

"Ikaw, Caya? Did you really mean everything you said before? Mula sa pagpaparetoke hanggang sa kung bakit gusto mong may mapatunayan sa industry?" she asked while we're playing. No luck so far but I'm enjoying the adrenaline rush.

I smiled. "No. I uhm, I was forced to do all that so mommy's plan will work out. Wala rin akong ibang choice kun'di panindigan ang mga sinabi na ni Crystal sa interviews kaya kapag may nagtatanong sa akin sa set, I just well, play along even when the only reason why I wanna cry in front of the camera is because I wanna cry in front of the camera."

She pulled the lever then sighed. "You know, you're one of the very few people in the industry who really want to be an actress because of your passion. Naiinggit ako sa'yo noon dahil alam ko sa sarili kong ganoon din ako dati, pero noong akala ko iniwan ako ni Croft, I became desperate to make him regret what he did to me. Sabi ko noon, success will be my form of revenge. My name will follow him everywhere like karma. Nawala 'yong Astrid na masaya sa ginagawa niya." She flashed a broken smile. "I'm glad you survived. You became my reminder back then of who I really wanna be. Besides, I like Caya better. Crystal doesn't suit you as well as Caya does." She smirked and poked my waist. "Because you are so pure and you are powerful in your own way. For that, you deserve to be celebrated for who you truly are."

May init na humaplos sa aking puso dahil sa narinig. I didn't make a lot of friends in the industry back then when they still know me as Crystal. Sinubukan ko talagang ilayo ang sarili ko sa iba, pero iba ang hatak sa akin ni Astrid.

She's like a big sister who once defended me against a veteran actress who's bitching at the set of a movie we were both part of. Kahit alam niyang mapagagalitan siya ng manager niya at pwedeng ma-bash, wala siyang pakialam.

I've been looking up to her since then without her knowing, that's why hearing her say those words made me tear up.

Natawa kaming pareho nang namuo na nang tuluyan ang mga luha sa aking mga mata. "Kasi naman, Astrid eh. Ayaw na nga kitang tawaging ate nang hindi ka mailang kahit na parang nakatatandang kapatid ang tingin ko sa'yo."

She smiled. "Well, I would love to be called that way. Wala naman akong kapatid at gaga naman ang sa'yo. Sabunutan ko 'yon, eh."

We laughed softly. Maya-maya ay na-divert ang aming atensyon nang mapansin ni Astrid si Rafael sa isa sa mga poker table.

"Si grumpy superman, mukhang pinipikon," Astrid joked.

Kumunot ang noo ko nang makita ang matinding nakakuyom na kamao ni Rafael. His jaw was clenching really hardly, too while he's staring at the other player in a sharp way.

Bumuntonghininga ako. Kapag napaaway siya ay sasakit na naman ang ulo ni Croft. Kapag na-stress si Croft ay ma-s-stress din si Astrid. Ayaw kong mangyari iyon kaya kahit gusto kong layuan si Rafael, nagbaka-sakali akong lumapit sa kanya upang subukan siyang pakalmahin.

"Come on, mister pretty face. Stop giving me free money!" tumawa ang lalakeng kalaro ni Rafael bago ito humithit sa malaking tabako.

Halatang pinipikon talaga nito si Rafael kaya nang muntik nang tumayo si Rafael para kwelyuhan ang lalake ay mabilis kong hinagod ang mga palad ko sa kanyang mga balikat. Kabado pa ako noong una dahil baka hindi umepekto lalo na at nadama ko pa na parang balak niya sanang hawiin ang kamay ko.

"Will you keep your hands--" He paused after meeting my eyes. "Caya?"

Lumunok ako't kinalma ang aking sarili. I'm an actress, I reminded myself. I can pull this off.

I gave him a sweet smile. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

Napakurap siya. "You did?"

"Yes."

I sat on the extra seat next to him then ran my palm on his chest, hoping it would divert his attention and calm him down. Mukhang umeepekto naman dahil namumungay na ang kanina'y galit na mga mata.

Humugot ako ng hininga't tumingin sa kanyang kalaro. "Excuse my man's temper. He's a bit out of control when my hands aren't in any part of his body." I smirked at Rafael even when my heart is already pounding hardly inside my chest. "Right, babe?"

Tila nahihipnotismong tumangu-tango si Rafael habang titig na titig sa nakakurba kong mga labi. "Yes, baby," wala sa sarili niyang sagot.

My hand caressed his thigh while the other one rested on his cheek. "My back hurts, babe. Would you mind leaving the table now so you can give me a massage?"

Wala pa rin sa sariling tumango si Rafael. Maya-maya ay kusa nang tumayo at sumama sa akin palabas. Pigil na pigil naman ni Astrid ang ngisi niya nang parang puppet na sumama sa akin si Rafael hanggang sa labas ng casino. He looked bewitched honestly. Nakatitig lamang sa akin habang iginigiya ko siya patungo sa kanyang cabin.

I made him stand in front of his cabin. "There. Pumasok ka na muna nang hindi ka napapaaway. Ang ikli pala ng pasensya--"

"We can ask for essential oils," wala pa sa sarili niyang putol sa sinasabi ko. Ang mga mata ay nakatutok din sa aking mga labi.

My brows furrowed. "Huh?"

"You said you want some massage? I'll give you massage," he answered in a gentle voice which kind of surprise me actually. Naka-drugs ba 'to?

"Hindi na. Alibi ko lang 'yon kanina nang maialis kita sa casino bago ka mapaaway na naman."

"But I wanna give you a massage," wala pa rin sa sarili niyang sabi bago unti-unting ibinaba ang mukha na tila balak akong halikan. Nanlaki naman ang mga mata ko sa gulat at bigla siyang nasampal dahilan upang matauhan siya.

Rafael held his cheek I just slapped. Kumunot din ang noo niya habang pinapasadahan ng tingin ang paligid.

"What the hell did just happen? Why am I here?" he asked. Tila gulong-gulo sa nangyayari.

I sighed. "Mahirap ka palang akitin, Atty. Avila. Nawawala ka sa sarili." I patted his shoulder like what he did to me after he protected me. "Now go find a new cabin, good boy."