Stardew

The seat shuttered violently beneath me as the stuffy old charter bus bumped down the ever winding mountain road. The jarring movement had caused my slouched head to jerk forward and knock against the seat ahead of me. It didnt so much as hurt, but it had definitely startled me out of my thoughts and hazy sensation of falling asleep I had been desperately seeking for several hours, had been rudly ripped away. I shifted uncomfortably in the bus seat, the bus hadnt so much as pulled over for gas since Port Angeles, and my swollen bladder, and black sunken eyes were desperate for the long journey to come to an end. Realizing my attempt at getting any semblance of rest had turned up fruitless, my hand reached into my pocket to pull out my phones and ear headphones. i unwravelled the rubber wire: coiled around my smartphone like a serpent, and pressed them gently in my ears. Sweeping through my music app i pressed shuffle on a playlist and let myself get lost in the melody now filling my ears. Anything to keep my mind off of my current situation. The reason im here on this bus on my way to the last place in the world i ever wish to return to. As I soundlessly mouth the words to the high energy punk song blaring through the headphones, my eyes drifted to the widow i had my body slumped against and at the ocean of greenery and trees fly by. The road wasnt a particularly unfamiliar one, but with the spead, darkness of night beginning to close in, and the exhastion stinging in my eyes, it looked to me like a highway through a completely alien world. Another burning throb from my bladder. I groaned and turned my head towards the back of the bus to the little toilet area in the back. I wrinkled my nose in disgust, just imagining what kind of filth id descover in the hellhole after the over 6 hour bus trip. "I dont think I've lost enough dignity yet to subject myself to that sort of horror" I thought to myself a little dramaticly, deciding to hold it a little bit longer before relieving myself. My bladder barked in protest. The charter rolled on for what felt like eternity. When my bladder felt as if it was finally going to burst and my head screaming for a cigarette, the bus slowed and stoped. I peered out the window to spy the old wood sign, its faded white words spelling out "welcome to Neah Bay". The doors sprung open and one by one the passengers stood up to gather their baggage and shuffle out of the bus. Getting up from my seat, and stretching out my sore muscles, I pulled my suitcase and duffle case from the overhead baggage hold. The sum of my lifes posessions all packed and ready for my new life. I didnt take my time to clamber out of the stuffy vehicle and sprint to the reststop bathroom. After finally relieving myself and exiting the reststop, I set up camp against the wall infront of the parking lot and pulled a cigarette out of the pack from the pocket of my black leather jacket. Taking the lighter from its designated spot in the breast pocket of my flannel shirt beneath the jacket and lit the end of my cigarette. Taking in a long drag of the smoke i let my head fall back against the wall, partially from the dizzy relief of the nicotine rush and from the crushing exhastion starting to bare down on me as the last of the light slowly faded. The glowing end of my cigarette had burned down to the the butt, when a pair of headlights appeared to turn and pull into the reststop lot. A rusted old blue sedan with a chipped windshield and a bumper that looked conspicuously like it had been welded back on in a Jack Daniels soaked daze without much if any knowledge or care. My father, a short disheveled fisherman, who sported a scraggly short salt and pepper breard, a slight slouch, and a trucker hat pulled over his thinning gray hair: smiled meekly at me and hopped out of the drivers seat. He limped around to the otherside of the car and walked towards me with outstretched arms. I quickly dropped my cigarette and bummed it out with the heel of my Doc Martin's boot and unplugged my headphones, pulling them out of my ears. Forcing a smile to my lips I walked into my fathers open arms and tentatively let him hug me. "dad" i said, not breaking the hug. "Oh my little Sashie" my dad crooned against my hair before pulling back from the hug to look at me, "Im glad to see you finally." I avoided eye contact "yeah, it was a long journey from Seattle," almost on cue I yawned loudly. my father chuckled softly "well you must be exhasted, lets get these in the car so we can get you to bed." "Please, be my guest" I nodded not wanting to avoid my bed longer than i had to. Dad took my bags and put them in the boot of the car as I pulled the passenger side door open and climbed into the seat. I strapped the seatbelt around my waist as my father closed the loaded trunk and limp towards the passenger side door in the shuffling way he did. he opened the door and jumped inside. Shooting me a small smile just as forced as mine, he put the keys in the ignition and started the Sudan, "Alright lets get you home." Home. That word hit me like a ton of bricks as dad pulled out of the reststop. Neah Bay hadnt been my home since the two years i lived there after my parents moved from Montana. But that was many years ago, before my parents split and I went to live with my mom in Seattle. We drove in reletive silence, my father attempting to make awkward smalltalk and me responding the best I could, both of us doing our best to keep our minds off of the reason why I left Seattle and travel to Neah Bay to stay with my father. Just months ago, my beautiful, precious, loving mother had lost her life in a brutal car accident. My father up to Seattle for the funeral, I was living with my aunt at the time. She took my father and I aside after the funeral had ended and made her case that I would be better off finishing my senior year living with my father. And so it was decided that I was going to be living in Neah Bay. My attention was drawn out the window as we pulled up to a stopsign. A Woman in a wool knit sweater was stapling up a flier on a telephone pole completely littered with flyers all taped and stapled into the wood of the pole . To my disturbance all the flyers displayed the staring eyes of the faces of people. Some were of young teens and children others were men and women. Some of the photographs were printed in coloured in while others in black and white, all displaying the boldened letters MISSING. Dad noticed my disturbance and tried to lightly say "folk round here often wander out into the woods or up into the mountains and are never seen again." I nodded but his words didn't do much to quell the lerking sensation of foreboding and dread creaping over me. Creepy. The sun had said his final goodbyes by the time we pulled up to the house. By that time I forgot about the pole covered in flyers and the spooky feeling. Hopes for a hot bath and bed usurping my anxiety. Dad parked in the driveway and killed the engine. He sighed and gave me a look that almost seemed like pity, "well, welcome home hun." "yeah" i just pulled on a brave smile and nodded "I guess it is now." Both my father and I removed our respective seatbelts and exited his Civic and walked around to the trunk. Dad handed me my duffle bag and grabbed my larger suitcase from the back and slammed it shut. I followed my father slowly as he shuffled up the front porch. I stopped just above the front steps and peered up at the old wood paneled bungalow. He guestured to a small alcove on the porch with a glass table with an ashtray and a lawn chairs. "If you want to have a smoke you can do it here" he spoke, "just dont do it inside of the house." I nodded compliently, that was only fair since he was letting me stay under his roof. I walk up the steps as he twists the key in the lock and pushes the door open. I follow him into the house and stand aside to let him close the doors. Dad sheepishly rubbed his hands on his blue jeans, "well it really hasnt changed much since you last came to visit." It really hadnt, save the empty beer cans lying hodgepodge on the kitchen tabel, in the sink and scattered all over his armchair infront of the TV and on the floor of the living room. I did my best to look undisturbed and looked away from the mess. My father awkwardly cleared his throat and guestured down the hallway adjacent to the kitchen, "need help with getting your stuff to your room?" "No" I shook my head casually "I should be fine" "Alright" said my father shrugging as he brushed the emtpty cans off of his chair and flopped into the seat. "Ill be here if you need me." He switched on the hockey game and cracked open a Pabst from the box next to his chair. I shifted the duffle bag on my shoulder, shaking off the pang of concern. Grabbing my suitcase I walked down the hall to my old bedroom the suitcase dragging at my heels. I pushed open the last door on the left and flicked on the switch. The small bedroom that use to be mine had been left just how it had always been kept as a younger girl. Dropping my bags behind me I closed the door and begin to reacquaint myself with my old room. my eyes were drawn past my orange plaid sheeted bed to the curtained window and the thick wilderness beyond. The woods seemed to swirl and close in on me in the darkness. Shaking off that returning sense of dread i strode to the window and drew the dark purple curtains shut. I felt a bit better and satisfied enough with the state of the room, didnt need rearranged and my unpacking could be done tomorrow. The bed squeaked me as i flopped down on the sheets and began to unlace and kick off my black leather boots and peeled off the jacket, leaving them in a pile on the floor. My body seemed to recognize my bed and gave out as soon as my shirt and jeans were off. I dragged myself onto my pillow and nestled under the blankets as I gave in to the lead weaight of my eyelids. I dozed off immediately and with the light still on. As I drifted deeper and deeper into the bellows of sleep, my dreams were haunted by the numerous glaring eyes of the missing people on the flyers and a soft whispering of voices in a language I couldnt possibly begin to understand.