The wait I told myself I was waiting for.

Dear God, it's Marie. I called you so many times, though some point it felt like you heard. why yyyyy am I still here, no miracle for Paris. I have called on you to take me out of here, it's enough the way my sibblings treated me like a maid, simply cause I paid for nothing. The only work I did was pray cause that's, what I could do at the time. pray yyyyy. No one knew how my days went and more the best thing they did was look down on me. At times, I spoke and other times I kept quiet . My sister hurt me tons of times that when, anything in my life happened, she heard from a friend of mine. That was only if I told my friends. Day in nd out I cried to you God for an out from family. Time after time it was the same thing. Never a pray that I did not pray or song. At times was like I couldn't have a say at all. At night I stayed up like ,asking God whyy, who did I offend months and months same story. Tried all I could in prayer in worship, praises etc. Felt like a rag that was only used for cleaning dirty spots , as I did time after time. It felt all was not working well, applications was a waste. Like I felt useless getting somewhere but no same rounds, time after time. just drinking and partying my life away would make sense, at this point. Present but yet upsent. people catered for me like a baby. my only escape was to sleep life away. Everything was closed , no opportunities, badluck became my second name. Disappointed everytime sad with heavy pain that could crush the city, day and day it grew more that could crush a city or cities. Then began to question God, knowing I was not supposed to. God where were you??God can you hear me??God do you understand, or see wat I'm facing?? God where is your light?? God can you stop this?? Do you exist?? The lists of questioning God grew, till months after months. one day it all changed.