Love Arranged

Chapter 9

I woke up in the morning with sore eyes…. I wish if I could have done anything differently and Sam wouldn’t have reacted the way he did. The pain in my heart is like a piercing pain which I just can’t explain. I wish he gave a chance to explain myself better. I can’t lose my best friend for life because of this. We never had such a disagreement or fight. I don’t know what it was more like. It was more like Sam was disappointed in me totally. s**t! I screwed up big time. Di, did warn me to take it easy with him and he might not take it well like how they did and I totally understand that. We have never been apart from each other since my birth for as long as I remember. Even when his mom wanted him to go to the USA and pursue his degree and master's after which he could take over the family business from there and she could take a break. He refused to leave as he dint want to part from me and now, I was betraying him by applying for colleges in the USA. I so hate myself for betraying him.

I don’t know how to make him feel better. I don’t like him being upset with me. The way he left is breaking my heart into million pieces. What should I do? Maybe I should give him a call? No… he won’t answer the call I know him too well. He must have switched off his phone and would have told his mom not to disturb him for sure. I will keep sending him endless messages… maybe when he switches on his phone, he will see my messages. I will go to his place and try to meet him and pester him to meet me and let me explain. I won’t let him sulk like this and be upset with me forever. He can’t do that. We promised to be friends for life.

“Pihu…. What happened?” I didn't realize she was in the room and looking at me while I was soo lost in my thoughts…

“I told Sam everything yesterday in the evening,” I told her everything that happened between us yesterday night

“s**t! I told you he might not take it well. But it's okay honey, he will come around. He always does. You guys can’t be away from each other for too long and I know the day as I have seen you kids grown-up”

“Maybe you are right... maybe he will come around but the way he walked out yesterday. That has never happened di”

“There is always the first time for everything Pihu… little did we know that you had plans for going abroad and studying out maybe, we could have prepared him and everyone accordingly. But now that he has to deal with it on such short notice. You need to give him time and space Pihu.”

“You mean I should not pester him to talk to me?”

“I dint mean that… I mean you can try as much as you want but he will only come back when he is ready to accept the fact which you dropped on him yesterday evening… that does not mean you don’t have to make any efforts from your end. After all, he is your best friend you know him better than all of us.”

I was thinking about what di said. “Hmmm…. I get it. I know he needs time but I won't rest until he is back on talking terms with me”

I mean he is the bestest friend I have in life and I can’t lose him. He is an integral part of my life and such an important person in life as well. I just hope he comes back sooner as I can’t deal with this pain as well.

Let me just send him texts before I sit and start studying for a while.

“Hey Sam, how are you?”

“I am waiting for you to text me back so please either text or call whatever, works for you”

“I am sorry Sammy…… I really am sorry please”

“Just me a chance, please…. I need a chance to explain myself, Sam….”

“don’t cut me off please”

I don’t know if he will ever respond to my texts. I have been sending him texts since night. I just hope he switches on his phone soon and sees my messages. Let him just see my messages and then if he wants, he can text me back. Argh!!! This is so upsetting….

After having a heartfelt conversation with my sister and sending Sam a couple of messages did give me a little bit a very little relief but I was still very restless and this week I had all the exams lined up which I wanted to finish without any hiccups but my luck just got lucky with me that’s it.

I got ready and sat at the dining table to have my food. But I just couldn’t eat anything. He not talking to me makes a lot of difference. Once he forgives me, I don’t want this situation ever again, especially, we not talking to each other ever again situation.

I just played with my food for a while and then finished whatever was served on my plate because I hate wasting food. So after I finished eating I just went into my room and started revising everything which was needed for the next couple of exams which I had lined up. I just couldn’t concentrate on what I was reading. I really had to get my head in the game. Big time not happening….

“Sammy please talk to me…. I really can’t get my head straight. I am just unable to concentrate. Please Sammy just talks to me. I didn't mean to hurt you this way. I didn't mean it, Sammy. You mean a lot to me and you know that right. I didn't take you for granted I swear. I am sorry. Please just talk to me. I am waiting please”

I just couldn’t stop myself from texting him and letting him know that I am really sorry about everything. I just hope he texts me back. I just feel like pulling my hair, aaahhhhh…. I hate this feeling altogether. Just talk to me Sam, that’s all I ask for. I just have my exams starting tomorrow. Maybe I should just get some sleep. My mind just won't stop thinking about the worst possible things.

When I woke up it was like 4 in the morning… everyone was sound asleep and I just couldn’t go back to sleep again. I just had Sam in my mind. The first thing I did was look for my phone and checked if I had any missed calls and messages. Guess what I had none. My phone screen was crazy blank.

“Good morning Sam, how are you? I hope you are eating and sleeping. Are you still angry with me? But why are you so distant from me? Please just talk to me. Let’s just talk please”

I couldn’t contain myself and sent him another long message and then I just threw my phone aside and tried to sleep again so that I could wake up at 6 AM and get ready for my exam and head out. Today I wanted to go alone so I asked dad to send the driver to drive me to the exam and get me back from the exam. Luckily, he agreed to my request. I dozed off after a while and then I was woken up by my sister at 6.30 AM asking me to wake up if I don’t want to be late for my exam.  

I woke up to my sisters shouting and quickly rushed into the bathroom and got ready for my exam. I was already running late for my exam. So I quickly grabbed something to eat on the go from the table and my driver Murali Bhaiya was waiting for me by the car. As soon as he saw me rushing towards the car, he quickly opened the door giggling. He knows me too well again. He has seen me grow up so technically he is family too. I sat in the car and we were heading out of the building parking… I felt like I saw someone familiar. I don’t know who. I was unable to get a clear view and then I thought I was overthinking as I was already disturbed with my issues with Sam.

I was just sitting and staring out of the window and looking at the passing clouds and passing vehicles mindlessly, I was not in my right mind as I dint even realize when I reached the center and Murali Bhaiya bought me to reality and I just looked at him and rushed towards my exam center to finish my exam. He stayed back so I just walked back and go into the car for him to drive me back home. It was a quiet ride and a nice ride back home.

The next few days just went by the same way. Quite rides and exams. It’s been a week already since I last saw Sam and he hasn’t responded to any of my messages. And now I am losing my head. I got off the bead and headed out of the room and wore my shoes and headed straight to Sam’s house now. I gave him enough space and time to come around and I cannot take it anymore now. It needs to be sorted now and today itself.

I started walking towards Sam’s house and within 15 minutes I was outside his door and ringing the doorbell. Aunt Sheetal opened the door to Sam’s mom, and I smiled at her and hugged her as it had been too long since I last saw her.

“Is Sam home Aunt?”

“Yes, Honey. Just come on in”

“Thank you”

“I know this is not my place to speak between you both but I guess it's high time that you guys actually make up. I know something went wrong and he has himself hauled up in his room for the past week. So just both of you make up already. Okay?”

“Yea…. That’s what I am here today for Aunt. I will just go up now”

I went up to his room and started knocking on his door again and again until I heard footsteps approaching the door. But did he not open it… he just stood at the door. But why dint he opens the dam door.  

“Sam I know you are right next to the door and I am going to wait for you to open the dam door and listen to me. I am not leaving unless you open this door and talk to me. I don’t care if I have to sit here for hours, days, weeks, or months. But I am not leaving unless I see you and unless I make up. So just open the door and let me in.”

I said those words and kept standing outside the door just like him. After a while, I just sat down as my feet started to ache after standing there all morning till afternoon. I didn't know when I fell asleep waiting for him. That’s was the last thing I remember me falling asleep right outside of his room door.