Feelings

Chapter 18

Lisa was thankful that it was already weekends, she didn’t have to wake up early and prepare herself for school. But she suddenly remembered that Jennie wasn’t around yet and if she was being honest, she’s becoming worried. Not that she’s being territorial like Rosé had joked the other night, it’s just that Jennie was with a boy and she doesn’t trust him enough with her since she didn’t know him personally. What if something bad would happened to Jennie? Lisa was beginning to blame herself for being such a coward, confessing wasn’t a bad thing, was it? It’s not the end of the world if the other rejects her. And besides, we all only live once. So Lisa thought if she finally met Jennie again, she will tell her how she feels.

Meanwhile, after Jennie had stay at Henry’s house the other night, she had to find a cheap place where she could stay in for the day. She was beginning to feel dumb, what’s the use of their dorm if she kept on finding another place to stay? For sure her mom would be mad if she found this out.

It was already 12 noon and she hadn’t eaten anything yet so she went to the nearest convenience store and ate her lunch there. As she was eating, someone from the outside of the store saw her and tried to catch Jennie’s attention by knocking at the glass wall in front of her. Jennie looked up and her eyes widened when she saw Jisoo enthusiastically waving at her. Jennie gulped the food she was eating as Jisoo went inside the store and sat across her.

“Thank god I found you, finally!” Jisoo dramatically said. “You have a lot to tell me.”

“For the millionth time, I’m fine. And it’s been just a couple of days since we last seen each other.” Jennie pointed out as she chuckled.

“This is so unlikely of you. Is something wrong?” Jisoo asked.

“I just need peace for me to be able to write the lyrics we’re going to perform on College Day.” Jennie half lied.

“Seriously?” Jisoo playfully rolled her eyes then sighed and she began acting serious, maybe that way Jennie would finally open herself up to her. “Okay, whatever your problem is or whatever you’re going through, I’m just here. My ears are always open to listen to you. I won’t laugh if you think it’s just a small problem or what. I want you to take me seriously this time because I’m not okay with you acting not the usual you. I’m worried, we’re worried. So come on, tell me. I promise to keep this a secret if you want, I won’t even tell Chaeng about this. It’s just you and me—”

“You’re talking too much.” Jennie laughed as she shook her head and sighed after. “But I have a question first.”

“Go ahead, ask away.” Jisoo said and listened intently.

“What did actually happened between Lisa and Tzuyu back then?”

“Well, that seemed to be like a legend now.” Jisoo lightheartedly joked. “Well um, remember the rumor about Lisa that I told you before? Her liking girls?” Jennie slowly nodded. “It’s actually true.”

“But she said—”

“Of course she’s going to deny it, she doesn’t want you to feel awkward.” Jisoo dismissively said. “Anyway, she liked Tzuyu before—”

“What about now?” Jennie asked, trying not to sound eager but Jisoo noticed that.

“I don’t know, we haven’t talked to Lisa since Tzuyu showed up.” Jisoo shrugged. “So yeah, the headline is Lisa likes girls.” Jisoo half smiled. “But wait, I too have a question. Why didn’t you attend the other classes the other day? What happened?”

“I looked for Lisa and when I asked her about Tzuyu she just snapped at me and I just got demotivated attending classes.” Jennie answered.

“That’s a vague answer though.” Jisoo suspiciously said and Jennie took a deep and sharp breath before saying anything.

“I mean, I’m not being nosy like what she told me. I just...care.” Jennie said. “I made her mad for simply asking and now I feel guilty for that dumb thing I did.”

“Hey, it’s not dumb okay. She just doesn’t see that you care.” Jisoo sympathetically smiled. “Shouldn’t you go back to your dorm? I mean for sure Lisa is worried too.”

“No she’s not.” Jennie scoffed.

“She’s the one who told me to call you.” Jisoo blurted. “It might seem that her mind is screaming ‘I don’t care about anyone’ but deep in her heart she has a soft spot.” Jisoo smiled. “That’s according to Chaeng since she personally knows Lisa longer than I do. So what do you say, shall I take you to your dorm?” Jisoo hopefully asked.

“I’ll think about it.” Jennie assuredly said.

“Think fast then.” Jisoo stood up. “I’ll go ahead, Chaeng and I need to practice for College Day which is a couple of days from now. We haven’t practiced anything!”

“I hope you don’t break up because of that.” Jennie joked.

“I won’t let that happen.” Jisoo narrowed her eyes as she shook her head. “Anyway, I’ll see you around and please go back to your dorm. You know the landlady don’t do refunds.”

“Alright mom.” Jennie chuckled and Jisoo bid her goodbye and walked out of the store.

***

After Lisa finished cleaning the dorm in the late afternoon, she decided to go buy some groceries since their fridge was already empty and she was with Jennie when they last went to the grocery store last week. Lisa wished she was already there. With her. But thinking of her every minute wouldn’t make Jennie just magically appear in front of her. A part of her wanted to search for Jennie, but how? Where should she even start?

Shaking her thoughts away, she walked outside their dorm and locked it before heading to the grocery store. It was just a quick shopping, basically just grabbing anything that she thought would taste fine and perhaps Jennie might like. After she paid at the cashier, she decided to take a walk instead of taking a public transportation to go back to their dorm, hoping that maybe she would bump into Jennie in the streets. It’s a small chance that it would happen but who knew?

As she was walking slowly, she began noticing that a black luxurious car was following behind her. It’s beginning to scare her so she walked faster, but the car matched her pace and she got startled when the car honked at her. The driver lowered his window and called Lisa.

“Ms. Lisa!” The man in his late 40’s called. Lisa immediately recognized the man's voice so she turned to him.

“Mr. Han?” Lisa said and walked closer to the car. “What are you doing here?” She surprisingly asked.

“I’ve been looking for you.” The man smiled.

“But why? My parents suddenly care now?” Lisa scoffed.

“Get in, I’ll tell you the reason.„ Lisa slowly took a step back away from the car.

“You’re not driving me back there, are you?” She suspiciously asked.

“When did I break your trust?” The man chuckled.

“Maybe you’re about to break my trust.” Lisa narrowed her eyes.

“No, I just want to talk to you privately.” He assured her.

Still suspicious, she slowly walked closer to the car again and was about to open the door but something caught her attention at the corner of her eyes. She turned to that direction and she saw a familiar face, her expression clearly yelling for help. Without having second thoughts, Lisa ran to help the girl that was being dragged by two men who seemed to be drunk just like her. She kicked them in their balls so they would loose their grip on the girl’s arms. And when they did, Lisa grabbed and dragged her away from the two man who were now roaring and cursing in pain.

“Are you alright Jennie?” Lisa worriedly asked and the person in question looked at her with drowsy eyes.

“Oh hey Lisa.” Jennie smiled. “Wait. Lisa?” Jennie said in shock. “What are you doing here?”

“We’re going home okay.” Lisa softly smiled and she put Jennie’s arm around her neck to support her.

“Wait, Ms. Lisa.” Han called from his car and drove to catch up with Lisa.

“I’m sorry Mr. Han, I have to handle this first.” Lisa apologized.

“Hop in, tell me where you’re staying in and I’ll take you there.”

Lisa was hesitant at first but she went inside the car with Jennie since it would take them forever if they walk to their dorm from where they were now. She told Han where he should take them and he started driving.

“Where are we?” Jennie dopily asked as she ran her hand on the door but Lisa stayed quiet.

“Who is she?” Han asked.

“She’s my roommate.” Lisa asked.

The man didn’t ask further question and just drove quietly until they reached the dorm. Lisa went out of the car and carefully helping Jennie. Before Han left, he handed Lisa a piece of paper.

“What’s that for?” Lisa asked.

“It’s my number. If you’re ready to hear me out just give me a call. But remember, decide quickly. There’s no time much left.” Han warned and Lisa got the piece of paper from Han. “I’ll see you around.” The man smiled then drove away.

Lisa was puzzled but she had to handle and take care of Jennie first. It was a bit of a struggle going to their floor since Lisa had a grocery bag in her arm while she was holding Jennie with her other arm. After Lisa unlocked the door, she slowly and carefully layed Jennie on her bed and then she put the grocery bag on the table before getting a basin and a clean cloth to clean Jennie. Seeing Jennie like this only made Lisa worry more, why would Jennie get herself drunk like that? Was she facing a problem? Lisa felt guilty for not hearing what Jennie’s thoughts were and why she had to face this alone. She felt guilty for not being able to help her beforehand and she felt guilty for not being a friend that she should be. Lisa sighed at her thoughts and started cleaning Jennie's arm with a damp cloth.

“Lisa?” Jennie weakly called and Lisa attentively looked at her.

“Yes? Are you going to throw up? Do you need a basin? I’ll go get a basin.” Lisa asked, but before she could stand up, Jennie held her wrist.

“No, stay.” Jennie said and Lisa sat back down without breaking her stare at Jennie.

“I should be the one telling you that.” Lisa mumbled.

“Have I told you before how pretty you are?” Jennie asked with her drowsy eyes that were trying its best to keep open. “You stand the most out of everyone. You’re different but...you’re amazing.” She weakly chuckled. Lisa felt her heart flutter but she tried her best not to get distracted by Jennie’s drunk words and continued wiping Jennie’s forehead.

“Please get some rest, you don‘t want to wake up with a hangover.” Lisa lightheartedly said, not meeting Jennie’s gaze.

“I don’t want you seeing near Tyuzu.” Jennie said.

“Why would I do that, we’re friends.”

“You want to know why?” Lisa sighed and looked at Jennie who looked serious despite being drunk.

“Sure, why?”

“Come closer.” Jennie whispered like a child with a hand near her mouth. Lisa brought her ear close to Jennie, thinking she would whisper the answer but she was shocked when Jennie grabbed her face and gave her a kiss. After that kiss, Jennie pulled away and whispered, “That’s why.” Jennie chuckled as she doze off.