Verge of death

Surviving in hell,

The next day when i woke up the first though that came into my mind was about the letter. I went straight to my mother in law's room, i peeped through the door and found that she was trying to tune a channel on a radio. There was a male talking, his whole point of discussion was about how to defeat the army and the government. The fact that disappointed me so much was that they were doing wrong translation of the holy Quran as i already had done that before when i doing my Quran memorization and translation. They were only focusing on few verses and translated it in entirety wrong meanings and told the people that going out in islamic way is to kill everyone who tries to be superior which was completely wrong. They were presenting Islam in a dreadful way that made the world out there to hate muslims and Islam. I wished that i had my rifle with me and I could shoot her right on her head because of her acts. I knocked on the door, went straight inside and handed her over the letter, she was all silent with a dreadful look on her face and cued me to go outside. I went outside the room and tried to find any means of communication with my parents as she was busy in reading the letter but it was all in vain. Only few minutes were passed that my mother in law came outside her room and and started again with her hallucinating words. She told me that i should donate my body my powers and my resources in the path that they were following. I responded to her with a fake smile on my face and told her that she was just like my mother and i'll obey all her orders. She took a deep breath and i felt like there was a complete satisfaction on her face. She told me that i should be going to Waziristan by next week with other few young girls and one woman with me and they'll drop us by a location providing all the facilities to us, and she'll inform me later on about my next move. God knows how much happy i was of thinking on the fact that i'll be returning back to my homeland without thinking about the consequences. She kept on talking for hours, trying her best to divert me from my aim but luckily i was so stubborn that i never dropped in her pool of illusions but i did show her the fact that i was completely on her side. Time passed on i had my dinner and ever single day the ladies of the town used to send different food items each day to our house. My mother in law was so happy from me and she used to praise me in every gathering and told the people that she was so proud of me just because i agreed as i knew that i had no other option left and wanted to go back to my country as soon as possible.....

The next morning when i opened my eyes i found that two female Pakistani journalists, dressed in western suits, came from and wanted some information about our culture, religion and beliefs. Unfortunately they came straight inside or house, i tried to show some hospitality and served them with fruits. At that time my mother in law was not home, i still remember their faces and innocence was flashing in their eyes like shining starts. I wish their footsteps never fell on this hell in this entire universe. While i was talking to them suddenly my mother in law came back to home. She stood at once near me, slapped me hard on my face, grabbed the table tight on her both hands and threw it far with all the fruits and nuts lying on the ground. It wasn't a new situation for me as i was bearing it all from last week and the ladies stood up suddenly, grabbed their bags and started to scream for help. When they couldn't find and means of their help they rushed through the door like a thunder. I was looking down and my mother in law was screaming and shouting so loud. She told me that they were non muslims and talking to them was forbidden. She went straight to her room, took a piece of paper and a pen and started writing something. She rushed back outside the door and asked a man to deliver this message to her husband as soon as possible. She came back grabbed me tight from my hand and pulled me towards my room, pushing me in there. She closed the door tightly for the outside and locked me away and shouted that I committed an act which cannot be forbidden. I was forced to enter the room and time passed as every second was a minute and every minute was a hour. At first the darkness of the room must have deceived me, or else my eyes were confused and dazzled by the recent glare of the light outside. For an hour or two I could make out nothing at all but dark lumps of furniture, the mass of the chest of drawers by the wall, and the black curtains that were all dusty and torn.

The next morning i woke up, went straight to the door and tried to open it but it was still closed. I started screaming but seemed like the house was haunted from years. No one responded to my cries, i pushed the door with all my forces but it was useless as she had locked it away. I was so hungry that i went straight to the washroom and started drinking water. My huger was suppressed for a while but then again after few hours i felt starving. I tried to get some more sleep and wait for the time until my mother in law comes back. Time passed and it was almost late afternoon that my mother in law came back as i could hear the bolt of the main door. I started to scream and made loud piercing voices but she never responded to me as she had lost her ability to hear a thing. Night approached again and like all forms of pain, starvation and suffering was locked into one person. I could hardly approach the table, grabbed an old vase and bound it tight on my stomach to get some relief from starvation. Thinking about my condition i blamed my parents for my situation. I was doing fine in my life, earning myself but i had no misery and no depression.