An English Rogue

Sorry seems to be the hardest word

POV: Lena

I got back into the city early the next morning. I hadn’t intended to be away over night, but truthfully I was slightly surprised we had returned at all. If it wasn’t for my family we may have just stayed by that lake for the rest of our lives.

I headed to my club Nox before I even thought about the fact I didn’t have my keys, so headed to the fitness studio instead. Two of my assistant trainers were in charge these days, since making the rota with Anna I had stepped back a bit, it allowed me more freedom to be at home when needed and teach classes when I could. My assistants were highly trained and motivated individuals and they’d both worked their way up from frightened rogues to powerful independent woman who I was proud to call my friends.

I bit the bullet and sent Anna a short but warm message about wanting to meet for a coffee and got a quick reply agreeing. My stomach was flipping at the prospect of seeing her but I had to, no matter which way it went, I promised myself I had to keep calm, and not be rash. My heart was breaking at the thought of her not wanting me around anymore but the pessimist in me had to allow myself to think the worst. However it ended today I HAD to keep my cool and respect Anna’s decision.

Even though I’d only been away for one day, after running through forests and chasing rabbits I had a certain odour of wet wolf about me that I couldn’t shake without a shower and clean clothes. I stopped off at a couple of high street shops on my way to the fitness studio and picked up some cropped black trousers and a loose fitting black shirt, I also grabbed a small over the shoulder bag some shined brogues and of course new underwear! Now for the shower!

I entered the studio reception and was greeted happily by Susie who was on reception today. It seemed like a massive luxury to have a reception for such a small enterprise but we used the position for a couple of reasons other than the usual ones, the keen werewolf sense of smell was handy for booking human and supernatural customers into the right sessions for them, as well as keeping out unwanted guests after all we had a lot of different people that came to us, and unfortunately most of them had suffered some type of abuse.

Susie seemed genuinely pleased to see me which felt refreshing, so I briefly stopped to chat with her before letting myself through to the changing rooms at the back and stripped off my clothes, shoving them into a locker out of the way. It was lovely to step under the hot jet shower even if I’d preferred to be in my own shower at home. I’ve always used the shower as stress relief and this was no exception, to say I was nervous about today was an understatement.

“Maybe we really should have stayed in the woods” I thought to Tala, who had been especially quiet this morning. We finished showering and and started to dress. Something I’d been thinking about for a while came back to me. I had to contact Kerri, but I didn’t have the number for her on me. I’d have to check which phone she’d taken. Her work was important to all of us, maybe I was being selfish but something told me it was time to call her home, it was time for us all to be together again.

I dressed quickly, and checked my reflection as I scooped my hair into a messy pony tail. I looked tired. Hell, I felt tired.

“Right Lena! Let’s go and win our family back” I said to myself out loud. It was go time.

I stuck my ID, phone and credit card into my new bag and headed out with a determined attitude. I had agreed to meet Anna at a small coffee shop in the centre of the city, I had about an hour until we were due to meet so I took my time walking through the park on my way and enjoying the autumn sun. I let Tala come forward and share control as we walked and I enjoyed seeing the park come to life with the scents of everything around me, and I try to hold on to that peace that we found together in the forest. We breathed deeply together filling our lungs with fresh autumn air, before I took back control.

I still managed to get to the coffee shop earlier than planned so I found a seat in the window where I could people watch and ordered myself an earl grey and a blueberry muffin. Nibbling my muffin I watched as people went about their busy lives. I felt Anna close before I saw her and as I looked up my heart stoped as I saw who she was with. Tala letting out a low growl as we recognised Geraint instantly. Feeling our gaze on him he turned protectively, bending lower to talk to Anna and kiss her possessively, I couldn’t help but notice he was wearing little Juno in a carrier on his chest. Our heart sank as they exchanged a few words and Geraint looked reluctant to let her leave. “Goddess I wish we hadn’t seen that” I thought to Tala who whimpered sadly in reply. “Deep breaths” I reminded myself “it doesn’t mean anything, it’s not over yet, we can still turn this around” I repeated like a mantra trying to reassure us both.

Anna came in awkwardly and joined me at the window seats, as she took her coat off the waitress followed her over to take her order. Anna ordered herself a cappuccino and and a croissant and I asked for another pot of tea, mainly to have something to keep my hands busy. Anna seemed nervous and I couldn’t blame her. I knew the feeling well. I took a deep breath, and fiddled with my buttons as the waitress brought over Anna’s croissant and went back for the drinks. It felt like the silence was stretching out around us, and I was desperately trying to think of a way to brake the stalemate. I’d thought so much about what I was going to say, but now, sitting next to my best friend the whole thing seemed so silly like it hadn’t even happened. Except for the silence…

“Two Nuns driving down the M54 when the devil drops out of the sky and lands on the car bonnet, the first Nun says to the second, “quick Sister Augusta show him your cross!” The second Nun leans out of the window and shouts at the devil “Get the f**k off, you bloody wanker!!”

Anna couldn’t help but crack up, it was a game we used to play when we were younger, telling awful jokes always made us laugh.

“Two old Nuns in the bath, one says “Where’s the soap” the other says “It does, doesn’t it!” Anna replied smirking at the old joke.

“I’ve missed you so much” Anna said straight away, not even taking a breath.

“I’ve missed you too, more than I can even say. I just wanted to give you space, and I hope it helped”. I replied honestly as the waitress brought over our drinks and put them down in front of us.

“I suppose it did. We had a good talk and we sorted out a few things”. Anna said as she nervously tucked a short piece of hair behind her, and my eye was drawn to the mark on her neck.

I felt impatient, I want to just say it outright, I wanted to know where I stood and if I was being kicked out I wanted to know! But at the same time I didn’t want to know. I didn’t want it to be over and I didn’t want my rash mood and poor choice of words to end anything that could be fixed.

“What do we do now?” I asked instead sighing, “it feels like it’s all such a mess”.

“I don’t know” Anna said honestly. “I love you Lena and I don’t want to loose you, you’re my sister” she paused, “but if it’s too hard for you and you can’t accept Geraint as my mate, it’s just something I’m going to have to accept”. She paused again. “I love you, but I can’t be without him.” She said quietly. “I’m sorry Lena.”

I thought about what she said and sipped my tea as the waitress came back over to check we had everything we needed.

“I love you too” I admitted freely. “And I want you to be happy, hell, that’s one of the reasons I encouraged you out to the event in the first place!” I dropped my voice, “Finding your mate is something you’ve wanted for so long, it may not be the path I see for myself, but that doesn’t mean I’d begrudge you all the happiness you deserve.” I paused letting my words sink in.

“Do you think we could all live together?” Anna asked hopefully.

“I don’t want to leave the family Anna,” I reassured her, “but I will do if you needed me too.”

“No!” She said suddenly and a little too loudly, causing the other customers to look our way. “No, I need you Lena, we call need you! I hope our home is always together. We are a family and we need to be there for each other!” She said firmly dropping her voice back down.

I hugged her then and held her tightly against me until she laughed and wriggled away.

“I have something to show you” she said beaming from ear to ear. “I wanted to see how you felt before I showed you, but now the time just feels right” she opened her bag and pulled out a dark blue ring box. “What do you think?” She asked opening the box and pulling out a beautiful sapphire ring. It was simple and understated but that made it all the more beautiful. The deep blue sapphire in the centre was a cushion cut oval with three white diamonds arranged on either side of it like sparkly little leaf clusters. It was perfect for Anna and I doubted I could have found her anything more suited myself.

“Oh that’s lovely!” I said smiling at my friend as she slipped the ring back on her engagement finger.

“I just didn’t want to turn up with all of these things going on, and not make sure you’re ok first. You are ok, aren’t you?” Anna asked worriedly.

“I’m so happy for you both!“ I exclaimed happily. “Ooh I can’t wait to plan a wedding!”

“Well I must admit I was thinking of setting a date around the Winter Solstice” Anna admitted “not that I’ve actually told Geraint that yet” she smiled. “Of course there’s still one thing missing..”

“Kerri!” We both said together and I took her hand in mine and kissed it.

“So I think we need to call our travelling sister back don’t you” I suggested with a smile.

We finished our drinks and payed the bill. Anna explained that if I didn’t mind, she had some jobs to do and that she would meet me back at the flat later. I was slightly relieved. I had so many emotions running around me that I needed to unpack. So we hugged and left the cafe.

Geraint was faithfully waiting outside like a guard dog and I forced a smile when we caught eyes. “Have a lovely day both of you, I’ll see you at home later” I encouraged hugging Anna again and giving them a quick wave.

“Pfft what did we ever see in him” Tala muttered to herself, as we we turned away and set off back through the park. This time we had a destination and we were quite happy to get there! Home!