The Moon's Choice

Luna's Banquet

Tonight Kyle will introduce me to the pack as their Luna. He told me this last night after he wore himself out.

"It's necessary. We already bonded, but you need a proper introduction. It's the right thing to do."

I don't answer him. I couldn't care less. I turn my back to him and switch the bedside lamp off.

He's busy making arrangements and I don't see him. I sit in the dining room, then I sit in the kitchen, then I sit in the library, then I sit in my bedroom. There's nothing I want to do. When I sleep, I dream of Kilian, so I avoid sleeping. Kyle is making the most of my insomnia. He's being kind and gentle, but he'll never be his brother and he knows it. Our relationship is complicated and brittle and one shove and it'll shatter to pieces.

He says things that upset me, but I rarely show it these days. He's always making plans. Endless plans that benefit only him. We'll have pups and name them this and that, we will make a Feast and invite all the neighboring packs, I will host the annual Luna's Banquet. I don't care about any of this. I just agree with him.

"Be more enthusiastic," he warns. He's been trying to show me that he's in control and that he makes the decisions and that's starting to upset me.

I bare my teeth at him. "Don't push it, Kyle. Let me be." He hushes up instantly and changes the subject. I won't allow him to take any other parts of me. He'll take what I can give him, and that's it.

I rarely see Claire these days. She's been hiding from me. I sense that she knows I'm not in a good place and she's keeping her distance. I'm temperamental and constantly upset. Nothing ever amuses me anymore. Sometimes I miss Kilian so much I scream and never stop.

He'll announce dinner, but I don't know why he's even bothering. Everyone knows, and a female, one of his w****s no doubt, came to me in the morning and congratulated me with a sullen face. I don't know why she bothered, either. I don't need her congratulations. Her presence irritated me and I snapped at her. I don't care what they'll think of me. I'll give them what I can, and that's it.

Kyle asks one of them, I forgot her name, to help me with my hair and makeup. I need to look presentable tonight, like a queen. Worthy of him. I didn't know they used makeup around here, but it doesn't surprise me anymore.

She's chatty and it's irritating because I need to focus hard on Kilian, but she keeps distracting me. This must be why Kyle chose her. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but he's too calculated and manipulative. I don't believe in his innocence. Kilian was naive and innocent, Kyle is another species entirely.

I look at my reflection in the mirror. I do look pretty, she did a fantastic job, but I don't compliment it and I can tell she minds. Then, she helps me pick out a dress. No, scratch that. She does the picking and I do the sitting and staring absently at the wall.

She chooses a black, sparkly dress. It's heavy when I put it on, but it fits me well. Not that I'm too concerned about that. Then, she chooses a pair of heels and accessories and voila, I'm all set and ready to go. I sit by myself in the room after she leaves and I stare at my reflection again. I don't recognize this person staring back at me. Neither does Kyle when he finally comes around.

"Martha did a marvelous job." He sounds awed. "You look like a queen."

He grabs my hand.

We descend the stairs and everyone's gathered around the dining room table. I take a seat and so does he, and dinner commences as usual. Before the main dish, clears his throat. He taps a fork against the flute. Everyone pays attention to it. I think everyone knew today was going to be the day he'd announce me because everyone's formally dressed like us.

They must be thinking we're this perfect couple, or maybe not. Walls can be thin and the wind carries conversations. The females all look a little envious, and the males eye me with admiration. They must think I'm privileged and fortunate to be chosen as Luna of a pack. Little do they know that if it were up to me, I would be roaming the woods, hungry and alone, until I found Kilian, and then we'd live in a small cabin of our own, and hunt for food every day. I'd bathe Ty in the evenings and we'd make love beneath the sky.

Kyle eyes me in warning, but I don't care. What can he possibly do to me here, in front of everyone?

"SilverMoon, I have an important announcement to make." Their eyes go wide and everyone's looking at me now. He grabs my hand affectionately and I let him put on his show. "As you all know, Ryn has been with us for quite some time. I'd like to thank you all for making her feel welcome, and for helping me court this beautiful woman." I want to snort. The formality is amusing. "I'm happy to announce that Ryn has accepted me as her mate and that I have chosen her to be Luna of SilverMoon."

They all applaud and I suppress the urge to roll my eyes. How lovely. He makes me rise and stand beside him, and he grabs my waist firmly and kisses my cheeks. His lips are cold and his teeth nip my skin. "You promised you'd try." He murmurs against my skin.

"This is me trying."

He then introduces his new Beta, but he doesn't carry himself the way Patrick did. I don't comment on this, because there's no need to. It's written on my face. "This is Beta Lee."

I fake a smile. "Charmed."

I'm making everyone uncomfortable with my gaze. They must be wondering where the old Ryn is, the kind and grateful one that paid compliments for just about everything. Well, folks, she's long gone. She's lost in an abyss looking for Kilian.

And she isn't coming back.

Dinner is served. It's steak and potatoes. It makes me think of the deer I had with Kilian almost every night. He was always kissing me and touching me and Kyle tries to do the same, but it just isn't it. Physically, it contents me, though. I'm compelled to smile at him and feel giddy at his attention.

I take a few bites of potato and excuse myself. They all watch me leave with confused expressions. I can't take another minute of this performance. I ascend the stairs and make for the bedroom. I take the earrings off and I hang the dress.

When Kyle comes in hours later, I keep my eyes screwed shut. He doesn't wake me, just lies next to me, and turns his back to me.

I can tell he's disappointed. Good. I am, too.

He's  gone in the morning.

I'm relieved, but concerned at the same time. I get up, take my morning shower, and get dressed. I choose a plain yellow sundress and flip-flops. I don't feel like dressing up today. These dresses all cling to my skin and it's particularly hot today, I can feel the heat from here.

I find a pair of sunglasses and I walk out of the room. Already there's someone at the door, waiting to tidy it. I thought this was meant to be punishment? But then again, things work a little differently here. I'm informed that breakfast was already served and if I want some, they would gladly serve me. I refuse. I'm not hungry. All I want to do is bathe in the sun and hope the sun burns away my troubles. I walk outside and the sun hits my skin. This is what I need today. I take a deep breath of fresh air. The air smells of pine needles and freshly mowed grass. The sky is a light blue and it's a glorious day, I have to admit.

I take a walk around the grounds and I come across the training area. It's behind the house and away from the bedroom wing, which is why I never saw them when I stared out the window. It's so different from the encampment. Everything here is organized and the warriors look fit, both the males and the females. And they aren't naked. I guess they have clothes to spare here.

Someone approaches me and I recognize him as Lee, the new Beta. What does he want from me? He bows his head in greeting.

"Luna, how may I assist you?"

"No need for the formality, Lee. I'm only looking." There's a sharpness to my tone that is unfamiliar to me. It surprises me, but I don't try to change it. It's better this way.

"Is there something you're looking for specifically?"

"No."

He sticks to my side, however, and begins talking about the history of SilverMoon. I don't remember asking, but I listen anyway. It's always important to know, since I run this pack, too.

"It was first established by Alpha Kyle's great grandfather. It was a great pack in the '80s, but declined after BloodPaw built their house around this area."

I stop. "We have neighbors?"

"No, but they're the closest to us. All the others are far away. There are only three large packs in the south, and SilverMoon is part of the three."

"Who's the third?"

"BlackFur."

All these names, they're a little hard to remember. We walk around the training grounds in silence. Then, he starts talking about the pack again. About plans and training methods. I just nod along, but I'm not listening to anything. He's kind and enthusiastic, but I can't help but compare him to Patrick. Sure, I didn't know him that long, but you could tell he was a male of honor. Lee is always trying too hard to please. I bet this is why Kyle chose him. He doesn't want to be challenged by his Beta, and he wants a Beta who fears him. Lee does.

I leave him and I make my way back to the house. I look up before I enter and Kyle is staring at me. He's in his office. I sigh with exhaustion and I make my way inside. Someone's rushing to me. I forgot what her name is. "Luna, the Alpha wants to see you in his office."

I ascend the stairs to the first floor. His door is open and when I walk in, he tells me to shut the door behind me. I remove my sunglasses. "What? What is it this time?"

He turns around. His eyes are dark and his nostrils are flared. "Why did you leave dinner last night? It was your announcement dinner. You were supposed to leave with me."

I roll my eyes. "Yes, because I'm supposed to know werewolf customs. Give me a break, Kyle."

His eyes soften. "You told me you would try. You haven't stopped thinking about him. You're always comparing the two of us."

"That's unavoidable."

"Ryn—"

"I gave myself willingly to you, Kyle. You know that. I haven't been fighting you, and I'm doing everything you want even though it's against my wishes. You can't stop me from thinking about him."

"You force yourself to think about him. You do these things over and over again just to spite me. Why don't you forget about him and try to live a life with me? Is that so hard?"

I turn to leave. "We're not going to have this conversation."

He comes between me and the door in a flash. "Don't you dare walk out on me!" He's using what I've dubbed his Alpha voice. It only works when I'm in wolf form. In human form, it's a completely different story.

"I'll walk out on you whenever I feel like it. You're upsetting me with your rules and your elevated standards. Why didn't you bond with somebody else then? When you took me, you knew I was in love with your brother. Deal with it."

His nostrils flare. "Don't try me."

"Or what?"

He presses his lips to mine and his kiss is aggressive and angry. He lifts me and places me on top of his table. "You'll be the death of me, Ryn. I can't tame you and it's driving me insane."

"I'm not a beast you can tame. You're just upset you're not the one I think about."

He wraps his hand around my neck. "I could kill you for saying these things to me."

"Then do it."

He doesn't. Instead, he gets on his knees in front of me and lifts my dress. He tastes the inside of my thighs, inhales my scent. I'm only mildly aroused. He's trying so hard to please me, but nothing he does is good enough. It never will be.

"We had a deal."

"I said I would try."

"You're not trying."

"If I say I am, then I am."

He tastes me through my panties and my legs tremble. He loves it when I surrender myself to him, and I don't have a choice when it comes to s*x. I throw my head back.

Lee storms into the office, but Kyle doesn't let go of me. There's no modesty in this world. I lower my dress and Lee clears his throat. Kyle rises to his full height. He hides me from Lee's view. I'm still trying to compose myself. He sounds annoyed.

"How dare you interrupt us?"

"Forgive me Alpha, but there's something you should know. Something urgent. It cannot wait."

"What is it?"

"The Nameless Pack," he says with a nod of his head. "They're here."