The Rain Is Yet To Come

I SIGHED IN DEFEAT WHEN my boyfriend ended the call. Is it bad not giving him what he wants? He called me names that I just wish I was a deaf. I called him to ask him out on a date but he asked me straight forwardly that whether I will have s*x with him or not. I mean, I do love him but I am still not ready. Cant he just wait for marriage? Now it looks like that I have to make it up to him, but how do I do It? I grab my laptop and then started searching. I typed then later on I will delete it. Then again, I will type and delete it after. Its hard! Cant I just ask my pizza in the fridge for answers? Pouting, I went to the kitchen to get my pizza. Its actually a left over from last night but damn, its still pizza so it taste delicious. I did not even bother throwing it in the microwave just to reheat it. Frozen pizza is the best. If me and my boyfriend will broke up then I will gladly ask the pizza to date. "Will you be my made for life?" I laughed on my own silliness. Now I wonder, they say that if you really love your man you are willing to give him yourself. Do I really love Bryan? Or am I still not ready? I chose the latter. For all the things, problems, and challenges we've been through I think I really love him. "What do you think will happen if I did not meet Bryan back then?" I unconsciously asked my self. Yeah, what will happen? I mean the two of us have been together for more than a year. And its the longest relationship that I have so I treasure him. I really do. Now I think i have to make it up to him. Im thinking about asking for his forgiveness. Yup, my mind is all set. Im going to make it up to him by asking for forgiveness and maybe ask him out on a date. It sound nice, right? I got up and went to my closet to pick an outfit. I mean, atleast I have to look nice. I picked my ripped jeans and my favorite shirt. Then I looked into the mirror but quickly changed my mind. I look...plain. So I decided to wear my blue off shoulder dress. And surprisingly enough, it suits me. I put on some light make up enough to highlight my face. And I finished up my look with a cute little white head band. There, I think I look good. I dont have any kind of wedges so I just picked my sneakers. And plus the fact that Im comfortable with this so Im going with this. For the last time a took a glance of my apartment before going put with a smile on my face. Looks like I am getting boys attention because I can make their head turn. Wow, Im flattered. I took out my phone when Im out of the building to ask Bryan where he is. To: Bryan Hey, where are you right now? I waited and finally, I felt my phone vibrated. With a smile, I quickly read it but only to found my self disappointed. Its not from Bryan, but from an advertising company! Arrgghhh, seriously? I felt impatient so I just sat on the nearest waiting shed that I saw. I looked up and here I can see the stars brightly. I was so amazed but something caught my attention. In the rooftop of one of the building, I swear I saw someone standing there and then poof. It disappear in the thin air. I stilled. Is my eyes playing tricks with me? Maybe its just the shadow or something. There is just no way that there is a man standing there. I looked at my phone when it vibrated, its from Bryan. From: Bryan Im here in Callagros. Oh, hes there? Callagros is the name of his favorite restaurant. I think thats where our first date was. I hailed a cab and told him where to drop me off. My eyes are on the window. Watching every streets that we passed. Watching the cars go. Watching the busy people on the streets. I sighed. For me it took forever before I got on my destination, but actually it just took 15 ninutes. I thanked the driver and he just nodded his head. Before I got out he said something that made me stop and think. "There are things that are imperfectly made not for you to fix, but for you to learn." Now, I am thinking. Should I really do it? Ask for his forgiveness when I just now realized that he is the one who should? I mean he called me names. Names that hurt me. I cant even imagine him saying those words to me. Remembering them made me want to cry. Why am I here again? To ask for his forgiveness to make it up for him? I am now having a doubt. If I wont, he will probably be mad at me and my feelings will be more hurt. But knowing him, he wont say sorry. He believed that as a man, he shall not bow fown to anyone, shall not ask forgiveness because he himself is too important to waste his time on those petty things. But looking around me, there is no turning back. I am already here and maybe so be it. I walked towards the Callegros but stopped when I saw something that will break my heart, meters away in front of me. My heart tightened and I think I should see a doctor. I gasp for air and I cat breath properly. The seen un front of me is really heart breaking. There...I saw Bryan kissing a woman. Maybe he felt my presence because he stopped and slowly looked towards my direction. Shock registered in his face. His face in which I admired for a long time. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. He was about to walk towards me when the woman he kissed grabbed his hand and said something. "Babe? We still have a date. Come on, lets go inside." He looked at her and then smiled. "Of course." They then started walking and as the rain started falling. For the last time he looked back at me with sorry in his eyes. And with a blink, Im all alone out here. My cheek became wet. And the reason is probably either the rain or my tears. While looking at the sky, I uttered, "Its raining, Rain." Then I smiled.