Carnal House

The Brentwood University campus was everything I had imagined it would be. As my mother and stepfather helped me carry in my things to my dorm, I had a feeling that this year was going to be a good one. Being a six-hour flight from home I would be able to branch out and find myself, figure out who and what I want to be. At least that was the hope. My older stepbrother, Fox, was here somewhere working on his second degree in something, I wasn’t sure what. We aren’t exactly close being that he is five years older, and we never had anything in common, he suffered through my company when I was younger. “Are you sure about this?” My mother asked for the millionth time. I gave her a sympathetic smile and a hug, it wasn’t like when Fox went off to college, he was gone a few months after they got married, I spent the last 5 years alone with them. When Fox came home it was only for a week at a time and while they used to do things as a family last summer was different, he hugged me and gave me a book and avoided me for the rest of his stay. Something had changed when he was gone, I saw him in a whole new, embarrassing light. A single look from him and my skin was on fire, begging for his touch, I thought maybe I had seen the same heat in his eyes once or twice, but I had to be wrong, it was wrong he is my stepbrother. “Yes, I am very sure.” Doug, my stepfather hugged me and ruffled my hair, something I hated but, in that moment, found comforting. “You have Fox’s cell and his home number, right?” Mom asked, also for the millionth time. “Yes. Though I highly doubt that I will need to use it.” In fact, I had no plans to ever use it. Fox was kind of an asshole, and I wasn’t looking to get on his bad side and be that annoying little sister. My parents left in a flurry of hugs and tears and promises to call often to check in. I felt relieved as I started unpacking, making my space my own for the next year. A picture of the four of us above my desk, a small reminder of home. I couldn’t help but wonder what Fox was doing right that moment. A month had gone by, and the only trace of Fox I had seen was the posters for his boxing match tonight, I did my best to avoid looking at them, he was half naked and oiled in his shorts and gloves looking like he just finished a workout. Avoiding him this summer was hard enough without adding very inappropriate feelings for my step brother. For about half a second I had wanted to go watch him but thought better of it, watching boxing and MMA had always been something I enjoyed but watching him get beat up would be too much. Besides, I had a date to a party tonight and he was cute, not as hot as Fox, but close. It wasn’t too cold yet, but I didn’t want to give the wrong impression with a short dress and instead chose skinny jeans and a sparkly black tank that accentuated but didn’t reveal too much and a black leather jacket. Hair and makeup done; I was doing a final fit check. I did my hair in curls, the light catching the auburn in the honey strands, green eyes popping with my smokey eye makeup, when a knock sounded on my door. I got lucky with a single dorm, so I didn’t have to worry about the perils of a roommate. “Just a second.” I called, deciding at the last second to shoot a text to Fox. Good luck tonight, knock him out! I hit send and opened the door, my date Caleb from my econ class stood there looking almost bored in jeans and a hoodie, a smile spreading across his face as he looked me up and down. “Damn.” He said with a chuckle. I suddenly felt self-conscious. “Is this too much? I can change.” I said jerking my thumb over my shoulder. “No, please don’t, you look great.” He held out his arm, I took it feeling nervous and excited, having never actually been on a date before much less to a house party. Except it wasn’t a house party, it was a frat party, and I got uncomfortable quick, between the press of so many bodies and the drinks he kept handing me I was not having any fun. I dumped the drinks as soon as nobody was looking, I may be nineteen but I’m not stupid, didn’t make it or pour it yourself don’t drink it. The music was loud, and more than one couple was getting…familiar where everyone could see, I needed to get out of here. “Caleb!” I shouted above the music to be heard, his hands on my hips swaying to the music even after I stopped. After what seemed like forever I got his attention. “Can you walk me back? This isn’t really my thing!” His glare was cutting, and his fingers dug into my hips as he tried to continue dancing with me. I shook my head, but he didn’t let up, leaning in to kiss me, gripping me by the back of my neck. I tore from his grip, leaving strands of hair tangled in his fingers, and shoved as hard as I could against his chest. “What the f**k was that?” How is that an invitation to kiss anyone? “Come on, I know you want it.” He said getting back into my space and grabbing my breast hard. I hauled back my fist and clocked him in the jaw, almost certain that the crack I felt over the thumping bass of the music was my own knuckles, my fist was on fire. The hand that gripped my breast tore my shirt as I shoved away from him, hauling ass to the door while he was still dazed. The cool night air calmed me only slightly, fear and adrenaline fought inside for purchase, fight or flight pushing me faster towards campus. My mind was in a frenzy, I couldn’t go back to my dorm room, he knew where it was and the door lock didn’t even work, and I would be alone. Holding my right hand to my chest I made a beeline for the library. It wasn’t empty but the microfilm section for the local papers was deserted. I found a quiet corner and let myself cry, for the time being I was safe enough to let go. Fumbling with my phone I pulled up my text thread with Fox, he hadn’t even read my text yet and it had been hours. It went straight to voicemail. Hanging up without leaving a message I pulled up his land line. It was answered on the second ring. “Yeah.” “Fox? Oh god.” “No, it’s Ash. Who is this?” “I’m sorry, I think I have the wrong number.” I did my best to muffle a sob, my stomach bottoming out. I can’t stay here all night. “Ryker? Fox has a fight tonight, he isn’t here. Why are you crying?” My heart leapt into my throat, he knows my name, and he doesn’t sound happy, the last thing I need is to piss off one of Fox’s friends but what was I supposed to do? “I need help. I need Fox.” He was the closest thing to home I had here, and he wasn’t even in town. I knew he was out of town; I had been seeing the posters for weeks. “Where are you?” I could hear shuffling and keys in the background. “In the library, the microfilm section.” “I’m on my way, don’t move.” The line died, before I could say anything.