The Lost Wolf

Chapter 9

LIAM’S POV

            I can’t help wanting to watch over her from the forest.  I need to be a little bit more conspicuous though since she saw me as she was walking back into her house.  There is an inescapable need to be near her and to protect her.

            I had hoped that she would go back into town this weekend so I would be able to run into her once more, but she has not left her house since returning.

            As I glance back towards the house, I notice that guy returning.  I had discovered that his name is Alex, and I do not trust him at all with her. How could she have such terrible taste in guys?

            My wolf wants to go over there and hurt him, but I know I can’t do that.  I rush away back to my pack before I do anything in which would cost my relationship with my mate.   

            The wolf within me is pleading for me to return back to the house and to go to her.  The distance between my mate and myself is causing so much pain with me and my wolf.  It is hard knowing that she is near somebody besides myself.

ALEXA’S POV

            I hear a knock on the door, and as soon as I open the door, a disappoint wave falls through me as I notice that it is just Alex. I don’t know who I was hoping for, but sadly, it was not him.  He has always been good to me, and I feel awful that I have been feeling this way lately.

            “Hey, I wasn’t expecting to see you tonight,” I say as cheerfully as I can muster.  I can’t let him know that I am beginning to doubt the relationship and marriage.

            To be honest, I’m not sure myself when the doubt has begun.  Was it when I first met the stranger, or did I feel a disconnect before then?  I need to be honest with him and let him know how I am feeling.

            “How is my sweet girl doing tonight?  I was missing you and I had to come visit.  I even brought your favorite meal from the Downtown Diner…. hamburger and fries.”

            “You are too sweet to me,” I respond back to him feeling as guilty as possible for my conflicted feelings.

            As he nears me and grabs me around the waist to give me a kiss, I nonchalantly turn towards the kitchen and pretend that I did not notice he was trying to kiss me. 

            “How about we enjoy some dinner with a movie tonight.  I was actually planning on getting cozy on the couch tonight and relaxing.” I turn towards him with two plates in my hand with the food he brought while heading towards the couch.

            “That sounds perfect,” he states as he grabs my hand and turns me into him for a kiss.

            My body begins to tense up as he nears me.  Something just feels wrong and I know that I need to discuss this with him.  And probably sooner than later.  I feel nervous to bring this up now, but I must.  I have been putting this off for too long.  He deserves to know.

            “Alex, I think we should talk.”

            “What’s up?” he asks turning towards me to listen to what I have to say.  He looks up at me, and I begin to feel myself wondering if this is the right thing to do, but  should get this out before I regret this decision.

            “Lately, uh…..I’ve been feeling an uncertainty about getting married so soon.  We are still young and well….I’m just not ready to get married this quickly.”

            “What are you talking about?!  We ARE getting married in three months.  Let’s forget this silly talk and watch the movie and the delicious food I brought over for you.”

Why is he pushing off my thoughts so easily without hearing me out?  This matter is important to me, he can’t just ignore my feelings on this.

            “We need to talk about this now…I have been having doubts lately.  I am just not ready right now.  Maybe in a couple years, but just not now.”

            “You b****, this is not up for discussion.  I had a feeling this was coming by the way in which you were distancing yourself from me them, but don’t worry, you will forget about these doubtful feelings,” he states as he turns to me and lays his hand on my shoulder.  There is a coldness amongst him that I have never seen before. 

            “Excuse me!?  I most definitely will not, and who the hell do you think you are talking to me in that manner?!” I scream at him startled by how he is speaking to me.  How could he talk to me so crudely?  No one who loves someone, would use that language towards them.  I am beginning to feel grateful that I had these doubts within me.  This is not someone I would want to be with.

            As he looks me in the eyes once again, my memories begin to fade as well as my doubts.  I try to hold on to them, but something is pulling these thoughts and feelings from today from within me.

            Suddenly he grips my hands and he pulls me against him into a kiss.

            As my body is pressed against him, the thoughts and concerns which were flowing through me slowly begin to melt away. I begin to feel guilty and silly for having these thoughts in the first place.  Of course, I love him, I remind myself.  I don’t know what I was thinking when I thought otherwise. It must have been pre-wedding jitters.

            “Maybe after the movie we should think about our wedding plans.  There is a lot to plan quickly if we are going to have a short engagement,” I declare as I snuggle my body within his on the couch.

            As he and I relax I on the couch, my concerns for the wedding and our future quietly disappear from my mind.  I am finally beginning to feel at peace and confidence in my decision to wed in three months.

            I am happy that I am beginning to feel at ease and am looking forward to our future together.  But I have this unnerving feeling that I am forgetting something important.

              I’m sure whatever it is, it must not have been that important if I can’t remember it. I think as I begin to relax my mind for the night.