Deep tenderness

paint a picture, does color exist?

Just like I wanted, she always treated me soft and tender. She felt like a warm hug, a feeling after a sudden good day. She always made sure I was okay, and I did the same, she made me feel so well-off. My world was black and white, she made it color just like the little butterfly did. Even when the world would not accept both of us, we were not going to fall apart because we gave each a feeling of deep tenderness. All I know is we could do anything, we can love, cry, or even kiss. I don't look out if people may be watching I only hope her to be cheerful, and for that, I would do anything. I don't hear anyone except for her and she makes me hopeful in energy. While the sky was dark but she was light I could only see. She made me feel so many positive emotions that no one could ever make me feel like. While the night passed with all the sweet tender love between both of us, I partly also missed my grandfather who wasn’t here with me.

She went back home and I laid on my bed, my thoughts were being slowly filled with how rare are people like aria in life. She was so precious to me. I dozed to sleep thinking about her, and with a huge smile on my face. The next morning when I woke up to the sound of birds on my balcony, I saw the butterfly was still there. I also noticed that the butterfly got injured. I gently touched his skin and saw that the birds were harming the butterfly. I took the cute little butterfly into my room and let it stay with me. Also, it reminded me of the aura of my grandpa so I couldn’t let it go. I got ready for school and checked upon the butterfly. I applied a little amount of formula to the butterfly's wing. The moment I went back to school I saw aria. Her presence made me so happy, I couldn’t even explain. It was like my fast beating heart was slowly beating and chemically happy. My heart was flustered. When I wanted from all the problems and hide from everyone, I always made sure if I was taking a look at aria. Because I believe that in her presence I can never feel any bad emotion.

I took off to my class in a hurry of missing out on my first French class. I sat among the others and certainly, started to discover French is really engaging and also very fun to learn. Later, the class ended and went to the restroom for a little break. As I got into the restroom, I felt a warm hug around my waist. I looked around and it was my precious girl, aria. We were made of each other and she was the universe I wanted to look at. Her lovely eyes and mine interlocked, both of us smiled. I always put her first in every decision. It felt like paradise when I was around her, my emotions of euphoria and joy didn’t have a stop. We were said that we could not be together because we both were distinct and come from different sides. To be honest we both throw off the stereotypes and tried our best being ourselves. Actually did what makes us both equally happy. And here we are, happily smiling with each other's company. It felt like a blessing to have her in my life, so I took this opportunity to tell her how much she means to me. I look into her eyes and start, “Aria I have always tried my best to express my feeling about you, and now I wanted you to know how thankful I am to have you, to have you as my everything. To have you as my girlfriend.” I smiled. She frowned and left my grip. It felt odd. What did I even do? Was it a mistake to confess my feelings for her?

After a little feeling of a cracked heart came by, I went back to class without any thinkings in my mind. As I sit to waiting for the next class I see mac coming over with his group. He was honestly very annoying, and we both didn't know why were we dating. He continued to annoy me as I ignore his presence. “Oh? Is that how you show me attitude ray?” He asks with the most sarcastic tone. I felt harsh and being judged. I didn’t still respond to him, and aria's reaction to being my girlfriend wasn’t very satisfying. I felt discomfort when he started to touch my face. I pushed him away and yelled aloud, “we are not dating, leave me alone.” he went on to look down on me and it was irritating how he wouldn’t know where to stop. He held my hand very tight and started to apply pressure with his pressing voice “what did you just say?” I just waited for the right moment. And just then Aria entered the room, I exclaimed at mac, “I am a lesbian and I am dating aria! leave me alone!” Aria looked at me and mac, her eyes were tearful. I realized that I came out to my whole classroom with just an argument. I could see people's judgmental eyes and mac laughing at both of us. Before I could say anything, aria pulled me with her taking me into the restroom. I could hear the whole class nagging both of us. I felt a different kind of humiliation.

Aria pushed towards the wall and faced me, “what do you think you were doing there a while ago? Huh? Don’t you know if my dad will get to know about this he will transfer me to another branch and I cannot ever see you again? Do you know how much it hurts” that’s when I realized that she was just painting my black and white life with her attractive colors? And it was actually how she shows her love.