Healing (Damaged Sequal)

Confessions and a Showdown

        After a while I took about a three hour nap. I woke up to the swelling almost gone and my bruised ribs don’t hurt any more.

        Dad sat on the edge of the bed reading. When he noticed I was awake. 

        “Hey kiddo. How are you feeling?” Dad asked me. 

        “To be honest physically I’m getting better, but mentally something is still wrong,” I said as I sat up and looked down at my hands playing with my finger. “After what happened with mom were you ever afraid to fall in love?” I asked him.

        “Yes,” I didn’t expect him to say that. I turned to him wide eyed. “After your mom hurt me, I was afraid to fall again because your mother used me and betrayed me. I thought we would be together forever and raise our babies together, but when we married she had changed. She would make phone calls and was in constant paranoia. When she was pregnant with you two she was also that way. I was afraid you two would come a little early because of that. After she gave birth to the both of you her eyes lit up with something I couldn’t tell. All of a sudden she kept packing away stuff. Telling me she was going through her stuff  and getting rid of things. When you were two months old, I caught her trying to leave me with the both of you. She told me that our marriage and love was all a sham,” Dad looked so hurt.

        “She finally told me the truth. The only way the prophecy would come true is if it was between her and I. She told me that is what a seer had told her. Her greed for power and destruction overwhelmed her and she took the chance to seek me out. She lied to me about every detail of her life after she left her mothers home. Her hopes and dreams. How many children she wanted. When she got pregnant with the two of you, she said she had what she wanted and was going to leave, but I had sent the boys and their nannies to your Aunt Anilise so I could spend my time and attention on her and her being pregnant. She was going to leave when she found out. She said if I hadn’t sent the boys to live with your aunt she would have found a way to sneak away with you two inside her. Your mother selfishly used me and betrayed me.” He stopped for a moment. I waited ten minutes before he continued.

        “She said ‘nothing against you, but I wanted the girls from the very beginning. You were the very person I had to be with to have what I want.’ She was going to use you to attack both Hunters and Witches alike. Causing chaos and bringing destruction on earth. Then when you two disappeared I thought your mother actually succeeded and just pretended and fought me about it. I tried to track her down, but then I finally believed her. She was searching for the both of you. At the same time Joshua disappeared. I didn’t see the connection, but I needed to find the both of you. Evan was always angry with me, but he put his anger aside because I needed my daughters by my side. I needed my little girls. I didn’t realize the fifteen year old girl I had to come to meet was one of them, but I’m glad I came here after Damon had that dream. I Just never realized my daughter had suffered so much.” He stopped again.

        “I am still afraid of finding love again, but I hope I do after my beautiful daughters get married and have babies of their own. I want to be there for you girls in any way because I want to be by your side for anything. My happiness is your happiness. My baby girl, are you afraid to fall in love again?” He asked me.

        “I’m so afraid. After what happened with D’Angelo. I know it was not real, but it was real to me, until I learned the truth about everything. My heart was broken into millions of pieces and it took me forever to piece it back together. Then when I learned I was going to fall for one of these men, I became even more afraid.” Tears were now falling from my eyes. I sniffled a little.

        “What if I choose the wrong person? What if they hurt me? Would they love me for me or use me to get children like me? A lot of these questions would run through my mind. After Johnny punched me last night, my fears became worse. I had to deal with being abused by D’Angelo. I told you the time I got sent to the hospital or a little hit here or there, but to tell you the truth I was hiding bruises, and broken bones. I was telling lies and hiding myself from the world. I was going to give him what he wanted, but then I found out that he was cheating on me with Jaime, but later I found out that he wanted to have children from the both of us. Dad, it was so much worse. I was lied to, whenever I said no I was being beaten, I was cheated out of love, and All I have to show for it is this immense fear to give my love and be loved back,” I said full on crying now.

        “I went through all of that thinking it’ll get better, but I could never have expected that it wasn’t real,” I turned into him and cried as my father cradled me in his arms and let me let my heart cry out from the pain. Dad set a barrier so no one could hear me. And for a while I cried and cried until I had no voice and no tears left.

        Finally once I calmed down he held me for a while longer. He just let us sit in the dark and silent room. He reached over finally unable to take the darkness and turned on my bedside lamp. I moved myself from his lap and we sat on my bed facing each other.

        “We are alike in so many ways. But I will tell you now. Three men in this house will do anything to protect you from even yourself.” I went back to the memory of Daniel stopping me from taking those pills. “They will protect you from others and would do anything for you. Given one messed up,” I thought to Damien. “One had tried to take a baby away from you,” I thought of David. “They want nothing more than to be by your side and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Whoever you choose out of those three, know this. You will be loved. You will be treated like the queen you never thought you were. They will be a knight, your king, a servant, and most of all someone who will love you unconditionally. Love doesn’t come without hardships, but you will work things out. Fate would never do something like this for no reason at all. Let your guard down around them and just give some love and see how it feels to be truly loved.” I was mulling through what he said for a minute when my stomach growled. Loudly. Dad chuckled and I followed suit.

        “I guess my daughter is hungry,” he smiled. We stood up, but before I reached the door dad spun me around and hugged me tightly. After that we went downstairs to raid the fridge for food. I also chugged water to replace what I lost from crying. 

        Daniel walked into the kitchen as dad’s food was ready. Dad looked at me and smiled. 

        “I’ll be in my room if you need me,” he said leaving me alone with Daniel. Without warning Daniel pulled me into a hug. For a moment I stiffened, but then I finally calmed and hugged him. He has always been by my side from the beginning. He may be quite childish, but he has a heart of gold. The first born, saving his brother, protecting and training Hunter children, and taking in a girl who they thought was just a normal girl. Now the man holding me, Loves me with his wholeheartedly. The more I thought about him the calmer I became. The more my walls crumbled and my guard dropped. 

        I had to stop thinking of them the way I have. An inconvenience. They are not. They are men who just want to love someone.

        I felt Daniel rubbing my back. I hadn’t realized I started crying. I felt like crap for being around them and keeping my guard up. From not receiving any of their love and now I’m starting to. Thinking about these past weeks. These past years as well. Dad’s right. I need to let myself feel their love and love them in return. They haven’t done me wrong and I don’t feel that way personally. My fear made me feel that way.

        “I’m sorry,” I whispered as I started to calm down.

        “You have nothing to be sorry about,” he whispered back, pulling back to look me in the eyes. I stared into his blue eyes, glistening with concern.

        “No, I do. I’ve had my guard up around you guys for a while. Not letting any love come my way. Not letting you guys emotionally close to me and vice versa. My fear has caused me to not want to get close to anyone. I mean we have talked and hung out, but I felt I couldn’t let any of you in. I was so scared,” I whimpered.

        “Why are you so scared?” He asked, holding my head and making me look up at him. My lips trembled. I bit my shaking lip. “Don’t do that, sweetie. You could hurt yourself,” he said. He used his thumb pulling my bottom lip out from between my teeth.

        “I was scared that I would get hurt again,” I whispered, ashamed of what I said.

        “I would never hurt you,” he said.

        “I know that, but my fear caused me to fear that and what happened with D’Angelo made my fear even worse. I told dad and I know you know a little bit about the abuse I had under him, but the situation was a lot worse than what you heard.” I told him what I had told dad and he was livid. I knew it wasn’t me he was angry with. He pulled me close and held me tightly, but not enough to hurt me.

        “Why didn’t you say anything?” David’s voice interrupted. 

        “She was afraid. Not only the way D’Angelo treated her, but also the way Johnny treated her,” Damien’s voice said. “I’m still angry at him for hurting her,” he said. I pulled back from Daniel. 

        “It’s part of his fault, but Kanah did this to him. She pushed her insecurities on him and used control over love on him. It’s all he’s known,” I said. His eyes darkened at his ex's name. He looked pissed and I cannot blame him. 

        “Does not excuse him for laying a hand on you.” We turned to see Charlie standing at the dining room entrance. “I have watched him gush over his love for you. How much he loves you and what he would do for you. I thought you had cured him of this, but then seeing him treat you this way. If he really loved you, he would treat you the way I saw him treat you when you were younger. I knew he would finally hurt you, because I knew you would confront him with the way he was treating. He’s done it before and habits die hard,” he said.

        “I agree. If you truly love someone you would not think to even hit them,” David said. 

        “That’s true. No matter how much you piss us off we would never think to even lift a hand towards you,” Daniel said.

        “I actually piss you off?” I asked. 

        “Yes.”

        “Yes.”

        “Yes.” 

        “Yes.” They all said at the same time. 

        “How?” 

        “The fact that we could never get emotionally close to you,” David said and they all agreed. Well that was kind of obvious, but I never realized it actually irked them. I just nodded my head. Then I chuckled after that. It got them to actually smile. 

        “So how are you holding up?” David asked.

        “Better than expected,” I replied instantly. “Though, Damien, I need you to pass a message to Johnny?” His eyes darkened and his smile was wiped from his face.

        “No,” he replied curtly. The corner of my lips twitched. I wanted to smile, but I needed to deal with this my way. I need to stand up and face Johnny and deal with him in a way I see fit.

        “Damien, he has been what we call disqualified. He’s unfit for the running, but he hurt me. I couldn’t fight back with D’Angelo. Now I can and I am going to deal with him the way I dealt with Daniel That one summer,” Daniel looked at me and shivered.

        “I’d hate to be in his position,” Daniel said, hugging himself. I chuckled and David chuckled.

        “I wouldn’t worry about her,” David said.

        “I still am not going to do anything,” Damien said.

        “How about I make a deal with you? You three can be in the training room and jump in if need be, but I have to do this Damien. He needs to know what he did was wrong. He needs to know if he lays another hand on me he will get his ass beat,” I compromised. He thought about it for a minute. Then he sighed. He was giving in to me.

        “Okay. What is it you want me to tell him?” He asked.

        “To meet me in the training room at nine tomorrow morning,” I said.

        “Okay,” he said. I took a bite of my food. It crunched. They all looked at me.

        “What? I’m hungry and haven’t eaten at all today,” I said, after swallowing what was in my mouth. I continued to eat while they all stood in the kitchen with me. We made some light chatter. The atmosphere seemed better and I felt better. My guard was no longer up and I was actually enjoying this.

        After eating Daniel took my plate and washed it while David cleaned the table. They wouldn’t let me lift a finger. I yawned feeling tired. Out of nowhere I am being lifted up into a princess hold and carried to my room. Damien had picked me up. He laid me down and said goodnight. He turned off my light and left me as I fell asleep.

        I waited in the training room for Johnny to show. Damien, David, and Daniel stood to the side as I waited in the center of the room. It was quiet and all I could hear was my breathing and my heart beating in my chest. I was nervous to face him, but with the three men standing to the side my nervousness subsided.

        Finally Johnny showed up. He was wearing black shorts and a black tank top.  He had his hair in a bun and he was rubbing his hands together. He looked nervous, and he should be. I crossed my arms. When he finally stood in front of me I glared at him.

        “Nice of you to come,” I said angrily.

        “Look, I’m really so-,” but I cut him off. I slapped him.

        “I don’t need your apologies. I’ve been hearing you constantly apologizing after you did it. We are here to establish something. Your change in behavior towards me. I didn’t say anything for a while. I thought it was just something you were going through. But when you increasingly got worse I figured I would finally have to say something. I just want to know what made you think it was okay for you to tell me about how to live my life?” I asked.

        “I didn’t want to lose you, okay? I needed to keep you by my side, but the fear became overwhelming when you just didn’t connect emotionally. Then I feared you just didn’t want to get close to me,” he said. I shook my head.

        “Then why didn’t you ask me. Instead you tried to dominate me. Tried to change me. When you dragged me from the car was something you don’t do. Just because I left to hang with your friend's wife. Or because I said I am my own person. What did Kanah shove into that brain of yours to make you act this way?”

        “I don’t know and mom did a lot. Not only did she talk bad about dad, but she was worried I would leave her too. I did, but…” his voice faded.

        “You guys do know I recognize any sort of abuse. To be honest the way you treated me I knew Kanah had something to do with your behavior. But Johnny I heard some not so good things about you and some other girls. To be honest I bet you have laid your hands on those other girls. Then you laid your hands on me. Do you honestly believe I would take you back after that. You need to change your ways, before your father has to finally do something about you. I heard everything yesterday and to be honest I did purposely stop my dad. I got the feeling he would have hung you upside down in the air using one of the elements. He would have to if I didn’t step in,” I said.

        “I don’t have any excuses. But mom did control my life. She told me how I should live. I guess she started seeing dad in me and wanted to stomp it out. If I didn’t do what she said she would hit me. If I started acting like dad in any way she would hurt me. She said she left him and didn’t want to have anything about him in her life. It may have originally been what mom said about dad that made me angry, but the worst part was that he never showed up to save me from her. To save me from her control. I ended up turning into her and I don’t feel very good about it. I hate myself and I in turn turned into the monster I never wanted to be,” he said.

        “Then why didn’t you change yourself? Why did you just keep this up? Charlie even said that he thought I cured you. That I would be the reason you changed. As it turns out you ended up just like your mother. I don’t say this to hurt-,” but I was interrupted and Johnny had swung. I grabbed his arm and twisted it behind his back and pushed him to the ground. “I wasn’t saying this to hurt you. I found that your mother when she divorced your father, that she still loved him, but when he mentioned divorce she thought it was final so she initiated the divorce. Your father never wanted a divorce, he just said it to get your mother to fight for what they had. Your mother is a coward. I would have fought the reason, but then again I would have never aborted my child. I would have kept that child and raised it. If she didn’t want anymore children she should have talked to Damien about. Your father isn’t all that unreasonable. He did love your mother, but what she did was inexcusable.” I let him go and stood up. “Just like her you acted on that without thinking about how that would make others feel.” I backed away as he stood up and turned toward me. I knew he was angry, but he needed to hurt before he would be able to change.

        Instead it was having the opposite effect of what I wanted. He charged at me. I was sliding side to side. When he got close I jumped to the right and flipped backwards and away from him. I could sense the guys were on edge watching. But I needed to do this first and when it gets out of hand they will jump in. 

        I watched as he turned around again. We went on like this for a little bit. Before I was getting pissed. He charged and I jumped, kicking his chin upward. I then grabbed his head, pulled him down and kneed him in the stomach twice. I spin kicked him across the room.  I stalked forward as he got up. I ran and jumped on his shoulder wrapping my legs around his neck and squeezed and flipped him slamming him onto the floor. I let go. He laid there. I wasn’t done. I waited and waited and waited until he finally stood up. Like out of the movies a song was playing in the background for me. It was just in my head. “Raise your Glass” by P!nk was running through my head. 

        We circled each other and watched each other's moves. Unlike Daniel, who knew I was going to beat his ass, Johnny was fighting back. I just keep handing him one after another. Blow after blow. Finally I was on the ground and he was about to throw a punch, he was pulled off me. Damien had him locked in a position where he was just wiggling to get out of the hold. David and Daniel helped me up. I was beat just from fighting him. We had been fighting for a good hour. 

        I was holding onto Daniel. Johnny finally broke free of his fathers grip. David stepped in front of me ready to fight him if he tried anything. 

        “I think it’s time to stop this, but I will tell you now I’m done with you. I hope you can change and be with someone you can love without feeling the need to control them and then hurt them when they don’t agree with you,” I said and then Daniel led me into the house.