Fated Mates: The Rogue

Jocelyn:Chapter Five

Jocelyn

Sweat trickled down my neck. My breaths were ragged and my hips sore. We have walked for miles and everything was killing me. My body ached from sleeping on the ground and my neck was sore from sleeping on it wrong. I wiped the sweat dripping down my face and turned to look at Danny.

He was unaffected. His breathing was normal, there was only a tiny bit of sweat shining in his dark hair and he had a smile on his face like he didn't have a care in the world. Prick.

That was the thing about him. He would smile and look around at the trees and bushes and point out little lizards. Ew. And different species of birds. Boring. My armpits reeked and I could feel a pool of sweat in the bottom of my bra.

My ankles had callused over but were being torn up again by the back of my shoes. I hated walking Hated it with a passion. I missed my convertible. I missed not having to sweat in the nice, cool A/C and the feel of the soft, tan leather seats hugging me.

I tripped over a branch and caught myself against the tree. I felt his fingers brush my hips as he steadied me and I jerked away from him. Now more than ever I couldn't have him touch me. Every touch sent my p*ssy into a wet, dripping frenzy and then it made his wolf come out in full force and try to 'fix' my leaky problem.

Right now was no different. He growled and huffed, stalking ahead of me, his neck strained and his hands in his hair. "F*ck! Stop doing that!"

"I can't help it. I'm sorry! Peri is...right now she's getting on my nerves with how s*x crazed she's being."

"It's not just her and you know it. I don't see her rise to the surface. It's all you, Jocelyn." Damn, even when he said my name I felt all tingly. Usually he just called me Peaches.

I crossed my arms over my chest. "No! It's her!"

I followed him in silence and he continued to walk ahead of me, still tense. It had happened a couple of times already and each time he seemed to get more angry. I was uncomfortably horny too, but I wasn't fixing to give in to my primal instincts and f*ck him in the woods, smelling like onions.

That thought alone made my arousal fade and as soon as he couldn't scent it anymore his shoulders relaxed. He sighed and stopped in front of me and turned around.

"I don't have to mark you, if that's the thing that's making you refuse me. I won't do anything you don't want, but if we don't do something soon, I'm going to go insane. Onyx is already pushing my limits as is, and when you smell like that I can't...I." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair again.

"I-I'm trying to be a gentleman, Peaches. I'm trying. "

I looked into his chocolate eyes and bit my lip. It was hard for me too, but he didn't understand. This wasn't the way I pictured my first time with my mate. I was a hopeless romantic. I wanted flowers and champagne and candles. I didn't want to f*ck with an audience of squirrels and birds around.

And I was still scared of him. I knew he wouldn't hurt me, but his wolf seemed pushy as hell. Danny seemed to give in to his wolf a lot more than I was used to seeing in the pack. It was like his wolf was in charge instead of him and I didn't like it.

"I know. Just..." I sighed and pointed to a big tree. "Go touch yourself behind the tree. Get some of it out of your system and we can move on."

He raised his eyebrows and turned to look at the tree I was pointing at.

"You want me to masturbate?"

"Won't it help?"

"I don't think so. We want you. Not our hand."

Peri purred and I rolled my eyes. F*cking sl*t.

"Well, that's not happening. I stink. You stink. I'm sweaty and tired and hungry."

"We can bathe in the stream. I'll catch some fish and we can rest for a bit."

"You're so romantic." I began walking again and I heard him sigh behind me.

"Peaches, you're just prolonging the inevitable."

"Do you think that once we f*ck, then all will be good and you won't want more? Is that what your brain is telling you?"

"My brain is telling me that I want you and you want me and you're being stubborn."

"That's exactly it. I want you. Not your wolf. I don't want him in control if we get together. You give him too much of it."

We got to a giant ledge and I turned back to him. He walked to stand beside me and looked at me thoughtfully. "So if I had made a move while he was asleep, you would have been okay?"

"No. We just met. What I'm saying is that I don't let Peri rule over my feelings as often as you let Onyx. You can't control him. He controls you. It's probably the reason why you attacked my pack. It's the reason you challenged Matt. Not because you wanted to, but your wolf."

"I wanted to challenge the new Alpha."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I figured if he was stronger and killed me, then at least I'd be out of my misery." He shrugged and looked up at the ledge. It was about ten feet tall. When he extended his arms, he could touch the top with his fingertips. I watched his muscles move under the skin of his arms as he pulled himself up.

"And if he wasn't stronger?"

"Then as Alpha of the pack I could probably try to salvage my image with you, but I doubted that it would work. I figured you'd hate me and reject me anyways. It wasn't my intention to win."

I felt my heart ache and he disappeared above me, having pulled himself up. I tried reaching up but couldn't even get my fingers to the top, tiptoeing. I was off by a few inches. He reappeared above me and offered me his hands.

It would be the only way up. I sighed and took them and used my feet to climb up the rock as he pulled me up effortlessly. Again the tingles threatened to pull me into a state of arousal, but my brain was refusing to react. All I could think about was what he had said last.

"So it was a suicide mission all along?"

"I killed my brother. My mate, in my thoughts, would never accept me for what I did. Nothing was worth living anymore." He shrugged and I dusted my already dirty leggings off. He let go of me and stood up. From where we were standing we could see above the treeline overlooking the forested mountain. I couldn't see a road in sight or even a town. It was beautiful. I stood and stared and felt like I was on top of the world. But...my heart still hurt.

I turned to look at him, looking at me and swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat. I liked him. I couldn't imagine a life without him being in it. And it was scary. I was fighting the bond like crazy, but I could feel it strengthening between us. I knew that it was the reason for the insane horniness and all of that crap.

It was fate bringing us to each other. But for what reason? Was this a punishment or a gift?

"Don't ever think that again." I whispered. I knew he heard me despite the wind. He furrowed his eyebrows and shrugged his thick shoulders. He was still wearing Josh's clothes, but I felt like it was more for my comfort than his.

Yesterday when he had walked around naked while his clothes dried, he looked like he was in his element. He didn't look strange or uncomfortable like I felt. He looked normal.

"If you decide to reject me, Jocelyn, I have nothing else. I don't plan on living if I have nothing else to live for."

I felt guilt creep up on me and I turned away. I hated being out here. I hated sleeping in dirt and not being to brush the knots out of my hair. I hated smelling like a vampire's nightmare and eating food without flavor. But even though I hated everything about this lifestyle, there was no part of me that intended on rejecting him.

Atleast not yet.

"Stop saying that. I already told you. You're a strong wolf. You can get over it. I know you could."

"Tell me, Jocelyn, you didn't wear glasses before you scented me right?"

"No."

"You ate normally and you slept well?"

"Yes."

"Me too. After your scent, I couldn't function well. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and believe it or not, I couldn't even masturbate without conjuring up your scent in my mind. Nothing made me happy. Nothing. And for a bit there, my vision was getting blurry too. I was getting weaker."

I knew all of the symptoms. I had them all. "I thought that I was weak." I told him. I looked out over the trees and breathed in the fresh mountain air. Truth be told, I didn't think I needed the glasses anymore. I was just too scared of getting rid of them. They had become a little bit of my armor now.

"No. Our bond was making us weak without each other. Now how do you feel?"

"I'm still sleeping like sh*t but I think it has to do with sleeping on the ground. But I can eat a whole horse now. I'm sure of it."

"Rejection for me, for Onyx, would drive us to be more rogue-ish and I have never wanted to live that way. When you said earlier that I give him too much control, I understand what you're saying. It's the reason why I am considered a rogue. And I can work on it. Onyx won't like it much, but I can try to be more human, for you. But if you reject me, at least do it somewhere where I know I can end it quickly."

I took a deep breath and shook my head. Despite the sun's rays, the breeze up here brought a coldness into me that I now couldn't shake. Or maybe it was his words.

"I'm not planning on rejecting you."

"But if I do something that you might not like, you will?"

"Jeez, Danny, you're a huge, strong guy! You would think you'd be a little bit less insecure." I rolled my eyes to keep myself from walking over to him and hugging him.

"Answer me. If I do something you don't like, will you reject me?"

"No." I clenched my fists and turned to him and glared. "No. I broke you out of jail after you killed my Alpha. You attacked my pack. I don't know what could be worse than that and I still haven't done it. I don't think I have the heart to do it because I can see that you're not all bad. You have some good and it f*cking irritates the s**t out of me that I can't just paint you in one color and be done with it. It would have been so much easier if you were an evil man. I could have just rejected you and been done with it, but no! Wes loved you and I had to make sure that he wasn't just brainwashed."

My chest heaved and I wiped at my eyes. He walked to me slowly and tentatively placed a hand on my shoulder. I felt the heat of his hand even through my shirt and felt the familiar tingles travel through my body. I looked up into his gorgeous brown eyes. I felt breathless as he lowered his face to mine.

"I haven't brushed my teeth." I whispered against his lips.

"Shut up, Jocelyn."

His lips pressed against mine and I felt my arms wrap around his shoulders. I kissed him back, opening my mouth to welcome his tongue. He was gentle as his tongue moved against mine, a complete contrast to what I thought he would be. My stomach tightened with need and he pressed me tightly to his hard body.

He nipped at my bottom lip, making my entire body burn. My first kiss with my mate.