Paradoxical Love

Chapter 15: Selfish

My alarm clock just went off, it's five o'clock in the morning and I need to get ready and prepare for our lunch later.

We usually take turns on daily responsibilities every day or whoever wants to volunteer. Yesterday, Kiana insisted on me to cook 'cause she said she always liked the homemade food I made for her.

She's much better than me when it comes to cooking our lunch, I've been spoiling her for too long, and I just can't refuse her especially since I'm taken off guard every time she smiles at me with the eyes of a cute puppy. Under such pressure, I'll never be able to resist how adorable she is and I had to yield to what she wants.

Now that I noticed, a heavy object is weighing on my chest, maybe my sister had slept in here again; this is always her routine staying in my bedroom overnight until the sun rises.

I made sure the door was closed last night, how did she get into my room? Whatever black magic she utilized, I don't care anymore, she wouldn't listen to me anyway, and forbidding her had no effect at all. She's soundly pretending to be asleep clinging onto me, I guess it's time to move now.

"Kiana, wake up. You are drooling." I tried pushing her aside, she's really had gained weight over the past few weeks.

I don't want to force her to leave since it's rude, though letting her do as she pleases isn't a wise choice. From another perspective, sometimes I really fancy staring at her messy hair especially her cowlicks, and also, particularly her cute face.

"Just five more minutes please..." Kiana refuses on getting up, she's too heavy I'm having a hard time breathing.

It's been a few minutes and she began shoving her head on my neck down my trunk, I guess she's doing it again. "Kiana stop, don't kiss me." She's really like that, she sometimes pretends she's half asleep, and when she gets the chance; she'd kiss my chest, I'm definitely fine whenever she steps her boundary between us, but I tend to get surprised every now and then.

Ever since I told Kiana she had the tendency to kiss me when she's asleep, the consecutive days that it happened became clear that she's actually doing it on purpose. I can't even push her aside now since I know she's faking it yet I can't provide proof, she can act innocent again when I wake her up.

"K-Kiana... Ahhh..." The stimulation's getting into me, I should push her but I can't hurt her.

Aside from our relationship as brother and sister, I can't deny that I'm a man with manly instinct. A human instinct in which none could overcome known as the sin of lust, but I held my reins for the sake of protecting my dignity.

"Reyler... you're hot..." And then she began sinking her claws on my biceps as she shoves her entire body on me. I was so uncomfortable I think she had hit my limit this time around. It's best I stop this farce once and for all.

"Kiana! Do you understand? I said stop!" I shouted at her showing I'm furious. I couldn't imagine what line she could cross if I let her be.

I feel sorry for her, it's been a long time since I yelled in front of her. She's acted on her own and it's what she got, getting rid of the unpleasant atmosphere between us is what I must focus on for now.

"I'm... sorry..." She's hiding her face under her blanket, I hope she can reflect what part she did was wrong.

"Please never do such a thing again, and I'm sorry for raising my voice..." I patted her head gently, she was about to cry so I just hugged her tightly.

I think she's undertaken a move on me because she's jealous about me having a childhood friend, I guess I can let it slide and think of it as a gesture of affection.

Still, I can't condone her actions. I know she's sad sometimes or feeling lonely, we're basically living under the same roof, but I can tell we aren't spending much time together for enjoyment, I guess taking her out once in a while as a family would be neat.

"Brother..." Kiana tugged on my shirt.

"What?" I frowned, her face is red and she's sweating even though the air conditioning is on.

"Hic..." She's hesitant to tell me, I have no idea what's she's insinuating.

"Hic...?" Does she have a fever or something? We just stared at each other until her eyes became fixated specifically on my neck.

"There's a hickey in the lower part of your collar bone..." Kiana whispered and I blinked twice and thrice.

Oblivious of what my sister was referring to, I got out of my bed, approached the table where there is a large mirror attached to the wall. And there I looked carefully at the lower part of my collar bone. There I startled but my expression seemed like a blank paper; I probe it as I behold a massive and conspicuous hickey displayed in front of me.

That moment when the thoughts in my head stormed out of control. I never imagined I could receive a hickey from my dearest sister whom I cared about.

How ironic it can get in this messed-up situation. A hickey from Kiana is beyond normal, I need to calm down and re-establish my temper, I'll handle the punishment for her in a way she'd regret it.

"Kiana," I called her name in a gruff, it's the way I explicate I'm serious.

"Yes! Brother!" Kiana panicked and stood up as if she was a cadet corporal in the frontline army. Hearing my cold-toned voice and asserting my anger to her is a must, she would definitely be guilty; for what she did is wrong

"Prepare breakfast for the two of us, right now." I sighed as I stared at her sharply on her reflection in the mirror.

She hurriedly darted out of my bedroom and went to the kitchen by herself. She knew following my order when I'm infuriated is very relevant or else I might totally prevent her from my room for eternity.

I wanted to scold her but what she did to me was a delicate thing. I hope she won't repeat it again, the punishment I impose on her was simply involving house chores, in this way, she wouldn't be discouraged nor be depressed after she's done.

The hickey's exactly below my collarbone anyways which can sleekly be hidden in my undershirt, but what if the mark's within the v-neck space of my t-shirt? Maybe I will not attend school for days.

In each day, my sister always finds her way overstepping the intangible green line she shouldn't cross no matter what. Though the way she kissed my neck, has a subtle ecstatic euphoria blending in its sweetness, I can't deny she really becomes selfish sometimes.

"Argh! I should prepare now, early birds get the worm they say." I slapped myself waking up my inner rationality and pride. She's my sister and that's about it, nothing more and nothing less. I'll just forget it, at this rate, I might even be late in the first period of class. I should take a bath first to refreshen this new day onwards.