Lunar Vow

A Wolf's Sorrow

Upon walking into my first period class almost thirty minutes early, I walk straight to my desk and pull out my textbook. I attempt to study as much as I could before the test. “Alright, class, books away and get ready for your test. It will begin in five minutes,” I hear the teacher say. Just then I see Serena walk into the classroom and panic floods my body. I begin feeling my pulse quickening as my wolf senses her and begins to try to take control of my body, I can feel my wolf attempt to claw it’s way out wanting to embrace her.

As the teacher walks around passing out the tests to each student, she's listing all of the rules for tests in her class, but my mind can't focus enough to hear anything except my own heart beating. Staring at the test, attempting to focus, I start answering each question, not knowing if the answers are correct, but trying to get it finished as quickly as possible, so that I can leave the classroom and get far, far away from Serena in hopes my wolf will calm once he can no longer smell her.

Finally finishing the test, he brings it to the teacher's desk and then promptly asks if he may excuse himself to the bathroom. Upon approval, he grabs his bag and rushes out and straight to the parking lot until it’s time for his next class. With the scent of Serena's wolf disappearing from the air, he feels his wolf begin to calm and go dormant once more, and in turn, his heart rate returns to normal.

Once the bell rings signaling for the students to head to their next class, Fenris begins to move towards the school entrance, when he starts to lose control of his wolf once more. “Serena must be close,” he thought to himself. “Damnit, how am I supposed to make it through another seven hours of this s**t when every time I get close to her, my wolf starts to try and take over, I am having a hard time trying to control it?” He asked himself, pacing, trying to think of a solution.

Back and forth, over and over again, he tries to think of a way to prevent himself from losing control and allowing his wolf to take over, when suddenly he gets an idea. Reaching into his pocket, he grabbed his phone and headphones out “the perfect solution, if I can't hear my wolf calling to me, then it can’t take control,” he thought to himself as he put the headphones in his ear and walked to class.

Arriving at the classroom door, Fenris hesitates, taking a deep breath and holding it for a few seconds before exhaling, then walking into the classroom. Immediately, he spots Serena, and his pulse starts to pound in his chest again, turning the music up to max volume, hoping it helps. He sits down at his desk.

After what seemed like an eternity, the school day is finally over as he leaves his last class, thankful that the music was able to help him control himself so his wolf couldn’t retake control. Dreading the drive home, not knowing if it would work with him being in such proximity to her, he gets into the car and stares out the window, not able to hear anything surrounding him until he feels a tap on his shoulder. “Fenris, we have to talk. I'm not giving you a choice any longer.” Serena states in a more stern than normal tone.

“Fine, but I'm only agreeing to this because it's still pouring down and it's like very wet and cold outside.” I replied in annoyance, “But just because I’m listening does not mean I actually care to hear whatever you have to say.” he continued to say before taking both of his earbuds out and putting them into the case.

“Okay, first I want to start by apologizing about the other night, I didn’t mean to seem so dismissive of your feelings. Second, I want to tell you that if I had known about how you felt, I would have tried harder to stay, but I had no choice in the matter.”

“Stop- stop right there, if you knew how I felt, you would have tried harder!? So your telling me you didn't even attempt to stay here with me.You just up and left without a second thought, like I didn’t even matter because YOU DIDN'T KNOW HOW I FELT?” I screamed not expecting for it to come out that way but not sorry that it did “n-no thats not what I meant, what I meant was I would have found a way to see you, found a way to say goodbye.” She stops a tear starting to form in her eye “what I'm trying to say is…. The reason I left is that my Godfather, whom I didn’t know existed, had come to get me after he found out my parents had died. I have family in Lycandra, people who loved me, people who wanted to care for me. I finally felt like I belonged somewhere.” She said, tears now streaming down her face .

“Okay, but that doesn't explain why you never called or texted or even f*****g emailed for gods sake, Serena, you left and forgot I existed.” I said, anger building inside of me, the feeling of my wolf prying at me to get out became stronger.“Why didn’t I matter enough to you for you to contact me?” I asked

“You did matter, Fenris. I wanted to contact you more times than I could count, had the number dialed and everything, but I couldn’t.”

“Why not? What was stopping you?” He cut her off, “If I meant that much to you, then why couldn’t you?” He asked

“BECAUSE I LOVED YOU TOO!” She yelled in his face “I loved you so much that hearing your voice and not knowing if I would ever see you again was too painful” she said a little calmer “but most of all, I couldn’t because what I found out a not long after moving to Lycandra. I knew I couldn’t hide it from you, I couldn’t lie to you, that it would kill you on the inside and I couldn’t hurt you any more than I already had” she said stammering

“Found out what our Serena? What could you have possibly found out that was so bad?” He asked, confused and stunned at the same time, “If you loved me that much, then what could have stopped you from coming back to me, from calling me and telling me? Why did you let me think that I didn’t mean anything to you?” He asked his soft tone tugging at my heart in a way that broke it “My god father he’s- he’s-“ she paused “He’s what Serena? Spit it out he said “he’s your mothers first mate and he told me that” she clears her throat. "He told me that you can’t mate from outside of your pack, the Moon Goddess doesn’t allow it, which means only one thing….. We could never be fated mated” . "Hearing those word from Mavrick killed me. I felt it would be best if I stayed away. Come back after you have found your mate. I had no Ideal that you have not bonded yet". "Then your mother and I spoke...that is when I found out."

"If you have not found you mate maybe ,this is not your pack either"...As Fenris cuts her off mid sentence .

“Which means what? What does that mean, Serena?” He asks in a tone of hurt and confused, “Which means that your parents might not be be your parents.”

Arriving home, Fenris gets out of the car and runs straight to the hillside, the words that Serena had just spoken into existence echoing in his mind, an unwanted guest living in his brain. Putting aside the fact that she had just admitted that she too was in love with him, he couldn’t stop thinking about how she had said his parents might not be his parents, implying that he had been lied to his entire life. Indicating that He had thought that she was the orphan when in actuality he was the orphan all along.

These words not only affected him but his wolf, too. Fenris couldn’t breathe. The words still echoed, hollow and impossible, each one slicing deeper than any blade ever could. Betrayal was a cold thing, sharp and slow-moving, and it filled his lungs until every breath hurt. He staggered back, shaking his head as though denial alone could undo what had been done.

His hands trembled, reaching out for something—someone—but nothing felt real anymore. The voices around him blurred into static, sound without meaning. All he could hear was his own heartbeat, frantic and uneven, like it wanted to break free of his chest. The wolf stirred beneath his skin, pacing with urgency, sensing the unraveling. It had been begging for this, for him to release control to it, to be let free, to be given power, and now, with his world crumbling, it didn’t ask—it demanded.

Pain twisted through him. His chest locked. The air turned thick, drowning him in heat and ache. The next breath came out as a sob that blurred into a growl, his body collapsing under the weight of grief too great to contain. The shift tore through him, not graceful or controlled—this was surrender through agony. Bones reshaped, muscles torn and mended, his cry dissolving into a wild, broken howl that split the night.

And then he was gone.

His wolf had been waiting patiently to burst free. Finally, Fenrus had given in to his wolf’s request, submitted to his demands, driven not by rage but by heartbreak and the feeling of betrayal . His paws struck the earth with a desperate rhythm, carrying him through trees and shadows, away from the pain that had nowhere else to go. The wind caught in his fur, cool against the blazing storm of emotion inside. Still, no distance was far enough, No run was fast enough, for him to ease the pain he was feeling inside.

Inch after inch, foot after foot, mile after mile, Fenris’s wolf carried him deeper into the woods, and without hesitation, he allowed him to go without caring where he was taking him, only that it was far away from his problems. Was it the healthy choice to make? Probably not, but he didn’t care. The pain he felt was agonizing, and he would do anything he had to do to make it stop.

Finally, his body came to a halt, and he looked around at his surroundings but could not recognize the area. The ground was hard, the grass was brown as if it had been dead for ages, and buildings rotted as if they had been untouched for ages. His wolf begins to walk towards the center of the abandoned town until he suddenly stops in front of a building that has several inches of vines and moss growing on the sides, standing in front of it staring as if it looked familiar, but he didn’t know why. “Where are we? What is this place?” He thought to himself, knowing he was alone, but then- his wolf spoke to him, “This is the town of Moon-fell, abandoned after a tragedy befallen. The pack that lived here was murdered, leaving no survivors, The pack and their history fading with time . This is the town in which your lineage started.”