BOUND-IN-LAW

I wasn't so sure what I wanted to do with my life after graduation. I'd always wanted to make my parents proud; that was the motivation for me to achieve well. But after that night, everything had changed. I had no motivation, no ambitions. I just didn't have it in me anymore to see anything more in my future. I knew I wanted an arranged marriage. That was the one thing I was sure of. And Rohan was the perfect guy for me. My parents knew his and, despite though him and I weren't that close, we knew of each other's existence and that was enough for me. "Hey, Pri." Rohan patted me on my shoulder and broke into my thoughts. He was smiling in enjoyment at me as he nodded towards my hand. "Your ice cream's melting," he observed, with a lop-sided grin. I looked down, realizing he was right and gasped. With the napkin I was provided, I wiped my hand before licking the cone and continued to savor the creamy, cold bliss. I could hear Rohan snickering from near me and I pouted. "Don't laugh!" I whined. "I'm not laughing!" he cried, raising his palms up in surrender. Glancing up at him, his eyes were bloodshot red and he looked like he hadn't shaved in weeks. It was as though he hadn't been able to sleep in months. It looked worrying yet the bright smile on his face appeared to refute any misgivings that had conjured up in my head. Shoving his hands back in his pockets, he angled his head at me. "What are you thinking about?" he asked softly as we strolled over the bridge going to my house, Finishing my cone, I stared down at my feet as I went. "Nothing, really." He didn't say anything as if he knew that it wasn't anything I wanted to talk about, and we both succumbed to a pleasant stillness. It was nice. It was especially lovely to meet Rohan again after several years. I knew him when we were younger but we weren't that close. I used to just follow him around from afar when he came from America. His brother never came up and thus I didn't ever meet him. Eventually, as we became older, we started to talk whenever Dad would come to visit. I was always a shy person, therefore I never really talked much. Rohan accepted and understood that never pressing me about anything. I still wasn't exactly sure where he got his politeness and impeccable manners from though. Whether it was here or overseas....who knew? "When are you going back?" I asked, suddenly curious. "In a week." He sighed. "I've left Jai alone back in America. He's not a youngster or anything, but as his bigger brother, I want to watch after him. I don't want to leave him there by himself." He gave me a side-long glance. "Who knows what he's up to?" I nodded and grinned. "That's true. Plus a week is a long time. We can make the most of your time here, even after the wedding." "Hmm." He clicked his tongue. "But, unfortunately, I won't be able to stay here for long." "What do you mean?" "I was only granted a short break for the wedding which was already hard to do. So, I have to travel back to America to work the day after." "Oh." "But don't worry," he raced out, "I'll be back in a month." A month? That's...a long time. To be a newlywed and to not be with the hubby for a month felt unusual. A feeling of fear and sadness descended within me as his words sunk in. We wouldn't get time to settle down with each other. I wouldn't be able to see him. For the rest of the journey, we walked quietly back to our house and after dinner with my family, he chose to head off back to his parents' house to remain for the week. But before he went, we both stood outside my door, smiling at each other, the past incident forgotten. I was too busy feeling like a euphoric adolescent to worry about what I was so anxious about before. He was reluctant to depart and I was reluctant to let him go. "Bye," I mumbled, staring at him and toying with my scarf. Looking at him today, I never believed we'd be where we were. I always assumed Rohan disliked me. When we were kids I would always follow Rohan because I really liked him. Since he was kind, he would let me but I didn't think it meant anything. He was just incredibly kind and someone I could easily chat to. And recently our marriage had been fixed. The engagement was over and the wedding was in three days. It was unusual because I had always imagined I'd never see him again. I had anticipated he would marry a foreign woman but the truth was quite different. "Trying to get rid of me already, eh?" He laughed when I shook my head furiously. "I'm just kidding," he said with a chuckle, a deep and throaty rumble that exploded deep from his chest. "Well, I guess after today I won't be seeing you until the wedding day," he added. I nodded and he started walking backwards, his tired eyes still on me. "Then, I'll see your beautiful self at the altar." A bashful smile arose, allowing Rohan to answer with a confident grin and a wave before he turned away. I shut the door and leaned against it, sighing quietly. I was biting my lip to stop a smile from appearing at our antics as I ran upstairs. *** "Priyanka?" A voice broke into my thoughts. I stopped watching Shah Rukh Khan's great movie K3G when my mothers' figure came out from my bedroom door and stood behind me. "Yes, ma?" I asked with a bright smile staring at my mother hopefully. She gave me a quick, almost frightened smile and walked closer. My eyebrows drew together slowly as I tilted my head. "Priyanka," she began, catching ahold of my hands and hugging them fiercely. I couldn't help but be alarmed at this strange aura that was coming off of her. "I wanted to talk to you about the wedding with Rohan." "The wedding? What about it?" For some reason, my heart was beginning to pound against my rib cage, as if it was dreading bad news. I really didn't want her to call off the wedding or anything—I was starting to like him already. He made me feel comfortable and made me laugh, something no male has ever been able to accomplish. "Well, when you get married, you know you have to tell him about what's happened–" There was relief at the fact that it wasn't about calling off the wedding but at the announcement of the other scenario, my stomach twisted and my eyes widened in fear. "No, I can't tell anyone!" I stared at her, trying to keep this secret, "Please, don't make me. He doesn't need to know. That was in the past. Please." My voice broke, tears almost immediately rising in my eyes. She moaned and nodded, pressing me to her body closely. "Okay, okay, honey. I know for sure he will understand and love you nonetheless. He will take care of you, dear." She smiled sweetly. "But if you don't want to tell, then you don't have to." I could tell how much it pained her too, simply talking about it. The attempted smile on her face failed to convince me as the tears in her eyes were too visible. But I was doing the same thing, pretending I was alright by smiling when I actually wasn't. When I was genuinely broken on the inside. Even though I was smiling just a few seconds ago, it melted away as soon as my Ma left the room, enveloping me in a room full of stillness. It wasn't an awful silence. It was...peaceful; calm even. Though my thoughts were anything but that. They were all confused. There was a moment before the marriage was fixed where I didn't want to get married after what happened. It had absolutely wrecked me and my future. But now...now, I wanted to be with Rohan no matter what. I wanted to tell him everything. But I just couldn't. *** There were only two days until the wedding. It was both exciting and nerve-wracking and I felt as though everything were happening too quick. I could envision myself being happy with someone as kind as Rohan, which was why I had accepted in the first place. I only had to make sure that I never spoke my secret to him. I couldn't help but apologize in my head for concealing something as significant as that from him. Lying was easy. Facing your concerns and stating the truth especially if it meant facing shame, was hard. I knew for sure that if I told him, he would never accept me. Not even the most understanding guy would accept that. Not even Rohan.