Silent

chapter 4

After I finished my history and art classes it was time to go home, most people were bouncing off the walls with joy. As for me, I wasn't so thrilled about it. I don't want to go home to my four walls of monstrosity but I don’t want to stay in the monstrous place either. I can never win, can I?

While I walked to my locker it was, all the same, everyone looked at me and whispered. They all cleared the way for me, knowing that if they don't move I’ll push them and they say “ if you push us we’ll get your nasty touch and die.” I guess that's one good thing about me. When I reached my locker I did the same old thing, I put in my combination and opened it. Shoved my stuff inside and slammed it shut. Loving that I don't get any homework because of my quiet ways.

“Arwyin can I talk to you alone for a moment? Alone?” Able said beside me. I looked up at him from under my hoodie and analyzed him. He's handsome, and he wants to talk to me? He probably wants to talk to me, not talk. There's only one way to find out. I nodded and he smiled “ thank you!” His smile was one of happiness growing, much as a spring flower opens. I could see how it came from deep inside to light his eyes and spread into every part of him. A person smiles with more than their mouth, and I heard it in his voice, in the choice of his words, and the way he relaxed. It was beautiful. He went to grab my hand and I flinched, he retracted his hand and muttered a quick “sorry” before signalling for me to follow him as we went to a private place to “talk” as he liked to put it. Once nobody was around he stopped walking and turned to me, a look of seriousness planted all over his face.

“Why won't you talk? Do you really have no voice or can you honestly talk? I don’t believe what Amanda says about you unless she's right about your voice box being broken and if it is broken then I’d have to..” he trailed off, looking away from me. Whatever he’s thinking I don’t like it, something deep deep down inside me doesn’t like what he would do and I don’t even know what it is. I tried to say something but nothing came out. This time when I couldn’t say anything I became frustrated, I can’t live like this anymore! “ you have beautiful eyes by the way” he said, changing the subject. I shook my head. He’s not getting the point he doesn’t understand how hard it is for me to live like this. I put my hands up, stopping him from saying anything else. Then I put up the number one, and he stared at my finger like I had just offended him. “ why are you - “ he was silenced by me grabbing the top of my hood and yanking it back. He stared at me, shocked. I closed my eyes, waiting for the mean jokes and snotting remarks but instead, I felt his hand go through my hair combing it softly. Then someone grabbed my hand. My eyes shot open. Fear consuming every inch of my body. I felt my breathing quicken as I stared at his hand encircled in my own. “ Arwyin-” he started but the fear in my eyes stopped him. His eyes followed my gaze and he stopped at our hands. “ oh god I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was holding your hand, please don’t hate me…” He rushed out, letting my hand go.

I opened my mouth to try and say something to make him feel better, but yet again nothing came out. I slowly closed my mouth and frowned. He watched me get flustered by my broken voice box and he looked pained as if he wanted to help me. If he only knew half of it. My gaze looked up at the clock and I felt my face pale. I’m late. I looked at Able and mouthed the words “ I need to go” as I began to turn and run out of the school. I ran as fast as I could. I ran through the town and down the street of gibbered, the street I live on. I ran until I reached the last house on the street, I went up on the porch and feared what he would do. I’ve never been late. Two months ago I moved in with my low life highschool dropout boyfriend. When I met him he gave me a sense of belonging and security, the world around him seemed to disappear as he spoke. He gave life a spark to my life. So I moved out of my mother's dead house and in with Felix Flynn.

Things were amazing for a while… until he came home late one night. It's strange how a few short seconds can lead you in a whole new direction. It alters how you think and act and see your own reflection. From a single moment on, my life was forever changed,

As if everything I previously knew had suddenly been rearranged. No one will ever understand just how I felt that day, I cannot even begin to illustrate the repulsive person I once knew. I was abruptly pinned against the wall of a hard, rough concrete stairwell. At two AM, where not a soul was likely to dwell. I was captured. There was no possible way to escape. Wondering if I deserved it and if it was truly my fate. I tried to fly away, but my wings had been clipped. I was like an innocent cow that he used to prod and poke. My mind filled with confusion, and he filled with lust. He took another part of me with each and every thrust. Tears like elegant pearls gracefully danced down my face.

I peered into his soul with a firm look of disgrace. His cold touch is like a vacuum, sucking out the life in me. His ears were wide open, but he wouldn't hear my plea. Standing there in the night, so scared, so exposed. I was covered by a veil of darkness, like the satin petals of a rose. The glowing moon looked down at me, peeking through a massive blanket of stars. I could touch it; it seemed so close, but it was really oh so far. Thinking about how my innocence is no longer mine to keep. What some can only imagine in their worst possible nightmare Is my gruesome reality that can't be undone nor repaired. cannot change the past, an event to which I succumbed.

I opened the door and was instantly hit upside the head with a glass bottle, the glass shattering everywhere. I fell to the ground holding my bleeding head. “ WHY ARE YOU LATE? YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE 20 MINUTES AGO SO YOU COULD CLEAN THE HOUSE AND COOK DINNER!” he screamed grabbing my hair and dragging me towards the basement. No no no no no! I struggled against him not wanting to spend another day in the basement. I grabbed my own hair and pulled against him, he ignored my struggles and lifted me to my feet roughly. He went to say something but he stayed silent, and a smirk started to grow. “ You were with another boy, weren’t you?! “ I started to tremble, when he spoke again he began to laugh. “ I always knew you were a w***e, messing around with all the guys!” I shook my head, he’s got the wrong idea. I don't talk to anyone, he should know this. How would I seduce a guy when I can’t even make a noise? “ You wanna know what I do too little whores?” he asked, grinning at me. Before I had time to shake my head I was thrown down the concrete stairs of the basement.