Her Sinful Mate

chapter ten

n a v e a h

The soft pitter patter of the rain against the window calms my rapid heart . I’ve been seated in front of the window for several hours now . I don’t know whether facing Lucian and Alexander is a good idea . I have various questions , but I’m not sure if I want them answered yet . I just wish I could cry it out , I wish I could let the tears run down my cheeks like the rain running down the window . I wish I could feel angry , I wish I could punch all the frustration out .

Instead , I feel nothing , I feel numb as I stare out the window toward the woods . My mind is flooded with unwanted thoughts of how I grew up feeling anything but special . Memories of my father spitting in my face that I’m nothing , but somehow I know that , that was just a way to make me submit to him . To submit to feeling absolutely nothing . Because I thought I wasn’t worth anything , so why should I feel sorrow about not being special , when I can just feel nothing ? He wanted me to feel anything but special , because he knew that it would result into me feeling nothing .

Someone slowly opens my door but I refuse to turn to acknowledge them or scowl at them for not leaving me alone . Goosebumps erupt on my skin as the person slowly walks into the room and I just know that it’s Lucian . Only he has this effect on me . I can feel his heated gaze on my back , his presence and scent all around me and the warmth of him as he makes his way toward me . Instead of saying something , he sits next to me on a chair -- I don’t know where he got from .

His presence surrounds me , a wave of serenity washes over my thoughts , drowning each thought . I sigh through my nose , leaning back in the chair . I feel his stare at the side of my head , but refrain from turning to meet his gaze . “Do you have the same ability ?” I ask just above a whisper , referring to Alexander’s power . It wouldn't surprise me if he did .

Lucian leans forward in the chair , resting his elbows on his knees , his gaze now focused out the window . “Yes .” He replies after a moment . I avert my eyes to him , watching the side of his face intently . He truly is attractive , with a sharp jaw , flawless skin , silk soft hair and the most mysterious eyes I’ve ever seen . I watch his lashes as he blinks , mesmerized by how long they are . God , why can’t I be blessed with such lashes ?

“But you’re a Sin ?” I whisper , cautious to say it too loud . With the way Alexander reacted when I said it , I figured it’s not something you should say too loud . Lucian turns his head , looking at me with a gleam in his beautiful gray eyes . “Yes and so are you .” He says blankly , a ghost of a smirk coating his lips . I chew on my bottom lip , lowering my eyes to his hands that are now free of any gloves . My lips part as I stare at the tattoos littering his hands and the silver rings around his fingers . f**k , his hands are hot .

I clear my throat and look away . I’m a Sin . I just can’t bring myself to believe that , I just can’t wrap my mind around the thought . It feels surreal and alien to me . “Are you sure ? Because it doesn’t feel like it .” I mumble , bringing my legs up to my chest before wrapping my arms around myself . “I would’ve noticed if I had any magic .” I lick my dry lips , watching the trees sway with the wind and the leaves flutter . It truly is beautiful , the woods .

“No , you wouldn’t have .” He clears his throat , twisting the sliver rings around his fingers . I frown , bringing my eyes back to him . Of course I would’ve noticed if I could move things with my mind or teleport to another place , is he being stupid right now ? Obviously , I don’t even know if that’s the ability that I have , I don’t even know what other powers there is . “Of course I would’ve , how could I not ?” I scoff , tightening my arms around myself . He shakes his head , leaning back in the chair and looks down at me .

“No , you wouldn’t have . Because you haven’t activated your powers yet , Naveah .” He informs in a tone just as soft as mine . It feels as if we’re sharing secrets with how soft we’re talking , perhaps in a way we are . I blink up at him at this information , I have to activate my powers ? How the f**k do I do that ? I groan , leaning my head against my arms , closing my eyes . I don’t understand why this has to be so confusing and complicated .

“Stop overthinking it , Naveah .” He says this so flatly that I whip my head up and glare at him . “If I could , I wouldn’t think of this at all , Lucian .” I say through gritted teeth . I’m annoyed at the fact that he thinks I can just accept this and not overthink it . Clearly he doesn’t know me and probably never will understand me . How does he expect me to not overthink this information ?

“I don’t think you quite understand how overwhelming all this information is . Mind you , I have to process all this after being kidnapped and finding out that my parents are dead . So , sorry for overthinking everything and not just accepting like you clearly want me to .” I sneer , letting go of my legs and before I can stand from the chair , Lucian sends me such an intimidating glare that I sit frozen in my seat .

“That’s not what I meant or want , Naveah . For f**k's sake , can you just calm down ? Stop taking everything I say offensive . Stop reacting like a f*****g child , all I meant was that overthinking it is just making it all seem worse than it is , ” He says in a tone that’s beyond cold and terrifying , his eyes turning a venomous dark gray . “Get over this attitude , it’s not cute . ” His words drip with anger and I shoot up from my chair , watching him in disbelief .

“Who the f**k do you think you are to talk to me like that ?” I bellow . Just when I thought we were actually getting along , he starts acting like a d**k again . He’s not even taking a moment to try and understand how it feels like for me . “I despise you !” I say out of rage , balling my hands into fists . Lucian licks his lips , calmly standing from his chair before taking a step toward me . I stand frozen , not willing to give him the satisfaction of cowering away . He stops right in front of me , glaring down at me .

“I understand fully how overwhelming this is to you , Naveah . I understand that this is a lot to take in at such short periode of time , but getting annoyed and snapping at me like that , will get you f*****g no where . Acting like a f*****g child and talking to me like that , is something I will never tolerate . So f*****g pull yourself together ,” As he finishes , I’m staring at him with my mouth agape . This man just never ceases to prove me wrong on being a complete asshole .

"No , Lucian ," I say eerily calm , my gaze hard and cold . "You don't understand how it is , so stop acting like you do . I don't know you and neither do I know who I truly am , apparently . I don't know how to feel about this , because I don't know how to feel anything . " I admit coldly and slowly . My gaze is unmoving from his , willing him to understand what I'm trying to say . But , it doesn't seem like he wants to or does understand .

He shoves his hands into his pockets and briefly flicks his eyes toward the window before returning his gaze to me . "Then let me help you , Naveah . " He breaths , the intensity and sincerity in his gaze causing my heart to thump rapidly against my ribcage . Some strange emotion I can't grasp onto tugs at my heart at his words and expression . Something in the way he looks at me makes me believe that he truly wants to help me even though he doesn't understand . But , the strangest thing is , that the small voice in the back of my head comforts me with the idea that maybe , just maybe , this man will be able to help me .