My Brothers Mafia Friends, My Bullies.

Vittoria The sounds of my daughters’ cries ripped me out of my haze. My head was pounding and vision blurry. My entire body screaming. I stumbled towards her room, gripping the walls to steady myself. I finally made it to her room, scooping her up and flopping down into the rocking chair. I knew I had to quiet her or it would throw Ray into a rage all over again. It wasn’t always like this. When me and Ray dated, he was amazing. Always doting on me, buying me small gifts that meant something to me. When he asked me to marry him, I didn’t hesitate. I loved him. And he promised to take me away from the city and my families empire. My family was Mafia. I truly loved them, but wanted nothing to do with the business. I wanted a normal life and mafia wasn’t it. My father was Don and led proudly. To me he was just my daddy. He always doted on his only daughter. My brother was his heir, and was preparing to take over. My mom passed when I was young from uterine cancer. My father was crushed and never took another wife. Although he had his share of women he slept with, he never settled down. One of his conquests was with the devil herself, Bianca. She hated me and my brother. Why she hated me I had no idea. She hated my brother Massimo simply because he was the heir. When she got pregnant with my half-brother Mario, she insisted he was the heir, but my father wasn’t having it. He ensured Massimo would inherit the family. For years she belittled us. Sabotaging everything we had. Whispering lies in my father’s ears. And sometimes he believed her. Which hurt. So me and my brother stuck together. But that came with sticking with his a*shole friends. Dante, Otello and Giovani. My tormentors. All handsome playboys, all complete pri*ks. Dante was the leader of the misfits. People feared him. He was a giant even in high school. 6’4, dark hair just below his shoulders. His Hazel eyes could mur*er alone. He was as serious as a heart attack. And the biggest pri*k out of all of them. He sent chills down my spine. Otello was the jokester of the trio, but no less intimidating. Also over six feet his short-buzzed hair and sharp blue eyes were disarming, but not innocent. Giovani was the quiet one. And frankly less of a di*k to me. He always had his head in a book. Dark shaggy hair matched his dark brown eyes. They were my bullies. Hurling cruel insults at me, spreading rumors. I never understood why my brother didn’t step in. He chalked it up to boys being boys. But any other guys would have disappeared. I had a feeling he didn’t know the true extent of their actions. Dante was ten years older than I, and the others just a year younger than him. But none of them acted like it. They were set to be my brothers right hand men when he took over. But it always annoyed me. Like he chose them over me. So when Ray offered to take me away, I took it. I was 22 and dumb. And now I regretted it. I should have stayed and studied. I was a straight A student in high school. I wanted to be a nurse. But I lost it all believing a sick man. Believing he truly loved me. The day I left, my brother was pi*sed. He didn’t understand why I eloped and packed my belongings in one day. He always hated Ray, always telling me he was no good. Turns out he was right. The honeymoon stage only lasted a few weeks before I started to see the dark side of him. Subtle things like shoving me, calling me names. We tried for kids, or I should say he did. I was secretly taking birth control behind his back. When he found out years later, he was furious. I took a beating of a lifetime and swore I wouldn’t do anything like it again. Not long after I got pregnant. A week after she was born, he started pushing me to start cleaning and doing other housework. At first, I agreed. I didn’t want me or my daughter in danger. Until one day I was hauling laundry up the stairs. I started bleeding heavily. I asked him to bring me to the ER and he refused. I passed out. When I woke up, he was nowhere to be found. Out with one of his wh*ars. I called 911 and good thing I did. I would have di*d. So here I was holding my daughter while I felt my face swell. I knew I could call my brother and end this, but Ray had completely cut me off from everything. I didn’t even have a phone I could use openly. And what’s worse? My father passed. I only happened to see it one day skimming through the New York obituaries. I didn’t get to say goodbye. I didn’t get to go to the funeral. I didn’t get to comfort my brother. I mourned alone. I had to get out. Tomorrow. When Ray was out drinking and doing whatever the fu*k he did. Or who he did. I already had a bag packed. Hidden in the ceiling of the bathroom. Money, burner, formula for Mia. I crawled into Mias toddler bed and held her tight. Tomorrow would be a new day. A new life. The next morning I made sure to be awake by 5. Early enough to cook his breakfast before he left for work. His father was a shot lawyer and he worked under him on small cases. “Morning wifey. I’ll take my breakfast to go. Got somewhere to be.” I was certain he had another family. And I didn’t care. I wished he would tell me and Mia to kick rocks and focus on his other life. “Yes Ray. I can box it up.” Just talking made me wince in pain. “That’s my girl. Ice that sh*t. I don’t need you making me look bad.” And with that he kissed my forehead and was gone. I watched him drive away before booking it to the bathroom to retrieve my bag. I dressed Mia and called an Uber. My pulse thumping in my head. What if he was watching me? What if he had a tracker in my bag? I didn’t have time to overthink. When I planned for my escape I didn’t even think about a car seat. I swung the door to the Uber open and the driver immediately looked us over. “I can’t take you anywhere without a car seat ma’am.” My heart stopped. Eyes instantly blurring. No. At this point I was desperate. “Please. Please ma’am. I just need to get to the Target. I’ll buy a carseat.” She must have not had a good look at my face. She turned around to argue and her eyes widened. “I think I should bring you to the ER.” “NO! PLEASE. I just need to leave. I’m begging you. I’ll pay you any amount.” I saw the hesitancy, but she clearly saw my desperation. Putting the car into drive and taking off. I buckled Mia into her new car seat and we headed off towards the greyhound bus stop. She was happily babbling, munching on her puffs. Contacting my brother was difficult under Rays thumb, but one thing I remembered was his email. I sent an email telling him me and Ray were separating and I needed a place to stay. Two hours into the bus ride he replied, giving me access to his house. I felt immense release. He told me he would be away for a few months on business in Italy and Secily. If I needed anything I could contact as*holes one, two and three. No thanks. I’d rather be on my own. Just me and Mia against the world.