Lost in You (#Book 2)

Chapter 18

I rest my head on Austin’s shoulder. No one else can surprise me, and make me happy like he can. “Are you happy? We’re driving to Long Island and then… it’ll be your turn.”

Huh? What? Is he going to let me drive this car? I look at him questioningly. “The Hamptons isn’t the surprise, it’s how we’re going to visit them.” He clarified.

I wonder what he found to surprise me now. Despite the many questions, I’m excited to go there with him. “Can we go to Southampton? Riverside? Montauk?”

Austin pulls to the side of the road, all of a sudden. He takes my hand delicately and turns around to face me and look me straight in the eye. “I thought you were better than the ‘broken-down’ car act, Mr. William.”

“You’re going to have to wait a little before I make love to you.” He looks at me seriously. My god, what’s he going to tell me now? “You’ve been the director of a new branch for a few days now. A new life awaits you, Rach. New responsibilities, a real leap into the unknown. You have to face your deepest fear, your deepest doubts, and put everything holding you back behind you. With what I’m going to offer, you’ll probably cry, be afraid, but also jump with joy. Do you trust me?”

“Of course, I do Austin.”

“What I want you to do is symbolical. But you’re also allowed to say no. I heard what you said last time about the Store I offered you. I don’t want you to think that I’m imposing anything on you. What we’re going to do might stir some deep things inside you. But I’m sure that once you’ll have done it, you’ll be a new woman.”

Austin leans over, to look at the sky through the windshield. “You see the parachute all the way up there?”

I lean forward. Ummm… yes I see the parachute. And? I stare at him waiting for him to say. “You’re going to jump with a parachute for the first time.”

What? That one person whom I try not to think about suddenly appears before me. I can feel the tears welling up. Austin knows that Jasper died on a plane he was flying. And naturally, jumping from a plane would remind me of him.

I take my hand away and turn my head towards the window. “You’re insane for making me do this!” my voice shakes. I can barely hide my tears. Austin is making me face the most significant trauma of my life. Asking me to do something this crazy shows… he doesn’t know me well.

With Austin, either you board the moving train, or you get run over. I understand he’s a bold man and likes to push people out of their comfort zone. He expects nothing but excellence from his co-workers at William Enterprises, and apparently from his girlfriend as well. What may seem like a risk from the outside, never really is one with him.

He analyzes all the consequences, before making a decision. “Look at me.” he says. I turn my head towards him. “I know you can.” If he’s challenging me like this, it’s because he can tell either that I’m ready, or that I need it.

“But…”

“You’ll feel liberated after.”

My stomach tightens all of a sudden. So does my throat. The fear of jumping out of a plane and the adrenaline rushing through my body, mix painfully.

“It’s going to be one of the most beautiful moments in your life, you’ll see. Except for when we first met, of course.” Nothing could be stronger than I felt when his hands first touched me in that bar. But … “It will help you gain confidence. Leaping into the void and flying is deeply fulfilling.”

I still can’t say a word.

“So, are you in?”

I nod slowly. Leaving my comfort zone has become a habit lately. I’ve come this far, I can’t stop now! Austin gives me a tender look and starts his engine, which glues me to the seat and puts my stomach back in its place.

I stay huddled in my car seat and stare at the sky with all the colorful parachutes. I can’t believe I’m going to do this. Jump form a plane and see the world from above… What a crazy experience!

I trust Austin entirely. If he’s taking me to this place, it’s because they probably have the best instructors around. “I can’t believe it… it’s… wow…”

He smiles at me and starts the car. I kiss Austin’s cheek, as he concentrates on the road. His smell makes me dizzy. He’s the one that gets my head spinning the most! “And what do you have planned for tomorrow? Deep sea diving?”

“We’re not sleeping here, we’re going back tonight. Sorry I have meetings planned tomorrow.” His answer feels like a whiplash.

“Oh. Okay.” I couldn’t not show disappointment in my voice. I can feel a tinge of frustration in my heart. I have to ask him the question that’s burning my lips. “And… is Miss Brown coming with you?”

“No, not tomorrow, I don’t need her.” Austin stops the car and nervously pulls the brake. He turns towards me, and smiling, gives the go-ahead to my new challenge… “Next stop: cloud nine!” his voice makes me leave the earth… I’m already floating away.

The more I get closer to the jumping base, the more anxious I get. It’s quite a challenge! A challenge that a lot of people around here must like, given the number of parachutes in the sky. Austin seems to be in his element. He says hi to a pilot, shakes hands and charms everyone with just a smile.

I can feel the first drops of adrenaline rushing through my veins. “Come with me let’s get you ready.” I follow Austin, unable to say a word. The knot in my stomach is starting to make me feel nauseous.

Austin stops at the front desk and shows me a pile of papers. “Every beginner has to sign a waiver. I’ve already read and prepared everything, you can sign the papers blindly for a change.”

I’m intrigued. “What’s in these documents?”

“Parachuting is an extreme sport. The document say that nor you, nor anybody from your family can go after the club if anything goes wrong.” And with that Jasper’s death plus separation from my family comes back and slaps me in the face like a boomerang!

I wonder what I’m doing here. What I thought was exciting, now feels reckless. Distant memories with Jasper comes back to mind. I’m torn between fear, apprehension and the memories.

But I tell myself to stay calm. I tell myself not to forget why I’m doing this! Austin takes me in his arms delicately as if I were in shock. His voice is softer. I relax a little. “It’s your first jump, you won’t be alone. You’re going to jump with a professional that will supervise everything.”

I hope he’ll be nice. Being stuck in the air with an i***t is a lot less fun! I don’t say a word and follow the club president; the one Austin seems to know, in a little room. Thanks for the jumpsuit I have to put on! You can’t say that it suits me too well!

I try to stay focused on the advice they’re giving me, so I don’t fall flat like a pancake when I jump from the plane! After all, I’m here to overcome my fears, not make a fool of myself! The club president asks me to watch a short video. It’s hot in this jumpsuit!

I must be beet red… And to top it off my flying goggles are digging into my head and flattering my hair. The video shows the club president and a beginner. I try to remember all the information… Cross your arms and legs, squeeze your abs tight, listen to the instructor and especially… close your mouth!

The last image of the video makes me feel funny: I’m going to jump from a plane flying at 10,000 feet in the air! A free fall of at least two miles through the clouds! But okay I’m not that clumsy. I can do this! I know what the key to my success is! Austin!

When I meet up with Austin, he has a teasing smile on his face. I’m scary to look at! Between my space jumpsuit, my big gloves, and my flying ogles, he’s never going to touch me again! “Come closer, I’ll help you put your harness on.”

I let him dress me like a puppet because my legs feel so weak! The phone in my pocket starts to ring, and it distresses me for a bit. It was Matt!

So princess, I hope you’re using your weekend to rest. You need to be in top shape for Monday at work!  His words make me smile. Matt’s kindness always soothes my nervousness.

“What’s making you smile like that? A secret admirer?”

“It’s a message from Matt. Seeing how tired I was on Friday, he’s checking in on me.”

“Well, it looks like she can’t go without you…” Austin tightens the harness firmly. His eyes are intense, cold. He hugs me tighter. Could he be jealous? I have to admit, I think it’s cute.

“Matt is simply my best co-worker.” I reassure him.

“You guys seem pretty close for colleagues.”

“You’re joking?” I can’t believe it. Austin is jealous of Matt, because of a text message?! And what should I say about mister hiring Miss Universe as his new assistant?

Austin hugs me tighter and looks deep into my eyes. I feel like he’s scanning me from head to toe. What is he imagining? What is he thinking? “You’re mine, Rachel.”

“I don’t think you understand… You’re the one that’s mine, Austin.” I kiss him passionately. His kisses feel like they’re caressing my heart.

“Let’s go, the plane is ready to take off.”

“Once you’ve put your hand to the plow, there’s no turning back…” I fret a little.

“Everything’s going to be okay, trust me…”

My legs have a hard time holding me up. They want to run away, and fast! I head towards the tiny plane that’s going to bring me to the world’s highest diving board. Austin gives me a hand so that I can climb into this metal bird. 10,000 feet high! I still can’t believe it.

I’m scared but I also can’t wait to see the Hamptons from up there. All of a sudden, I panic. I’m all alone on the plane with the pilot! “AUSTIN! Where is the flying instructor that’s supposed to jump with me?!”

Austin climbs in the cabin, smiling. “There is no instructor.”

“WHAT?! I’ll never jump alone! I’ve already forgotten everything the president told me!” I frantically started mumbling. Austin sits next to me and takes my hand in his. My heart is beating so fast! And that’s when the little plane decides to speed up and take off.

I want to throw up. No I want to cry… Or maybe both. I don’t know anymore. My body is shaking as much as the tiny plane taking us towards the clouds. “I want to exorcise my fears, but this is too much! I can’t jump alone!”

“Nothing is going to happen to you. Because your flying instructor is me!” What? Him? Because he’s also a parachuting pro?! “You didn’t really think I was going to let someone else hold you in his arms!” So in fact, I’m dating James Bond, the man ready for any situation. “Ready?”

“I’m ready for anything as long as you are here.” Austin is the only one that masters scaring me and pleasing me all at the same time… Am I going to regret this?