Broken Lover Vol 2

Chapter 6

It had been a week since Elise had spoken to Adam. A week since they had first had s*x. A week since she realised she was feeling… Something. Besides anger and embarrassment there was a rather overwhelming feeling to just be in Adam’s arms again. She hated it, because she was supposed to hate him, but every time she shut her eyes and went to bed he would appear in her head. Every time she touched her lips she was certain she could feel his kiss – and not just the recent ones, but the ones from all the way back in high school, when he held her sweetly and softly, when he pulled her to him all close, when he whispered out kind, gentle words. Why did she want that? Why did she need it? And why the hell couldn’t she just moved on from him? She tried with everything in her. Hell, she even went on Tinder checking out guys she could get lost in for a night or two – but none of them gave her that spark Adam gave her. As crazy as he drove her, he also made her feel something else when he took her. Protection. And kindness. And maybe, just maybe…. A tiny bit of love. Well, a whole load of love if she was being honest.

            She groaned into her hands at that. Was she really falling for Adam? That was the only explanation for absolutely craving his touch. Anger surged within her, but even that wasn’t enough to stop her from what she was feeling. She didn’t just like him. She wanted him. The kisses and the s*x… It was all fine until you started to want something else. Something more. Something that wasn’t so physical.

            She wasn’t falling for Adam – she had already fallen for him.

            Elise could see Adam walking around the office angrily. He had seemed to be doing that the entire week: just stomping along the carpet and even bumping into people every now and then. The worst part was that he didn’t even show Elise that courtesy – she didn’t get his anger or frustration. All she got was… Nothing. He ignored her, acted like she didn’t even exist when all she wanted was for him to notice her. As she watched Adam walk into her office, she dumped her papers down onto the photocopier and stalked towards him. She couldn’t take it anymore.

            “Is there a reason why you’re ignoring me?” she snapped as soon as she entered the room. She kicked the door shut, watching as Adam turned around and frowned. There was a sense… Sadness? on his face. No, why the hell would Adam feel sad? The new Adam, anyway. “Is there a reason why you’re acting like that night between us wasn’t…”

            “Wasn’t what?” Adam asked quietly.

            “Wasn’t…” Elise’s voice trailed off, not even sure where she was going with that. “Wasn’t exactly what we both wanted. Or maybe I’m wrong. Maybe you still hate me. Maybe what I did to you in high school really f****d you up and now you’re left with nothing but anger for me. Is that it? Is that how you feel about me? You just… You just hate me, right? That’s all there is to it.”

            A low groan left Adam’s mouth as he rubbed his hands over his face. “I don’t f*****g hate you, Elise. Look, everything is sorted out. The main issues with the company have been fixed and all that’s left is for you to put out some kind of statement onto the website. Let everyone know you’re back in business. I’ll be leaving after today.”

            A sharp pain hit Elise. A few weeks a go she wouldn’t have cared in the slightest if Adam had left – that was exactly what she wanted. It was what she thought she wanted, because at that point she didn’t want him to go anywhere. “You’re leaving?”

            “I did my job. It’s done,” Adam said with a lazy shrug. “Now we can part ways. Again.”

            “I guess that’s easy for you since you hate me so goddamn much.”

            “Oh my God, I don’t hate you, Elise,” repeated Adam.

“Well, you could have fooled me, because it certainly seems like you do,” shrugged Elise, her arms crossed over her chest as she walked towards him. She stood right next to him, glaring down at him and hoping it would persuade him to give her the answers she needed. “Was this all some revenge plot to get back at me? Are you even a real business analyst?”

            “You sound ridiculous, Elise.”

            “Do I? I’m just looking for answers.”                       

            “What kind of answers are you after?”

            “Ones that will make sense.”

            “Well, love doesn’t make sense, Elise,” Adam said with gritted teeth. He stood up slowly, staring down at her as his chest heaved, his breathing just as heavy as Elise’s.

            She took a shaky step towards him, her head tilted as she took in his words. Love? “What did you just say?”

            “Don’t make me say it again. You heard me. I love you. And no, it doesn’t always make sense. Sometimes it’s complicated. Sometimes it’s rough and angry and dark. Sometimes…” Adam said with a loud, heavy sigh. “Sometimes the other person doesn’t feel the same way back.”

            Placing a still trembling hand on Adam’s shoulder, Elise blinked at him. “What are you saying?”

            “Elise, God, are you blind? Don’t you get it? Don’t you get how I feel about you? I didn’t use you. You used me. You used me for s*x and I guess I was so goddamn ready to do anything to get that close to you that I gave in… Even though I shouldn’t have. Because now I know what you feel like. What you look like when bliss takes over, and I’ll never get that thought out of my head. All I taste is you. All I feel is you. All I love is you, but… But you still see me as that dumb high school kid who you tricked. Maybe I’m still him. I guess I never really grew up, because he was in love with you then and he’s in love with you now.” Adam ended his rant with a sad chuckle, rubbing two fingers against his forehead like he could feel a headache coming on.

            It was all a little much for Elise to take it. It was easy to understand what he was saying, but it was hard to comprehend it. The only thing she could do was stare at him for a long moment, just taking in his words and realising that they were the most sincere things anyone had ever said to her. That warm feeling she had felt when they were together was back. It was rising up quicker than before, stopping at her heart and making her feel comforted and loved.

            With wide eyes she moved in closer to Adam, pressing her chest to his as she gripped the sides of his face and pulled him into a kiss. It was soft. Slow. Not as heated and wild as all the others, but there was still so much passion. Their tongues met gently and Adam’s hands landed on Elise’s waist, holding her tight as Elise’s fingers massaged at Adam’s skin. They both sighed into the kiss, moving against each other slowly, kissing each other like the other would break. When they pulled away Adam rested his forehead against Elise’s.

            “Why did you do that?” he asked sadly. “Why did you make me kiss you when I’ll never get to do it again?”

            “Feel this,” Elise said with a soft smile. She grabbed one of Adam’s hands and placed it on her chest. It was right above her heart and she knew for a fact that he could feel it. That he could feel how fast it was beating. “That’s for you. Not for anyone else, it’s beating that fast and that hard for you, Adam.”

            Adam shook his head and furrowed his eyebrows. “What are you saying?”

            “Well, let me just say something first. Something I should have said to you a long time ago. I’m so sorry. You should hate me. I think I deserved every bad thing you said to me, every mean thing you did.”

            “I only did it because… f**k, I don’t know why I did any of that,” Adam sighed loudly. “I guess just seeing you again brought back all of those memories. Seeing you… And how beautiful you looked, I just… I got angry, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I did to you.”

            Elise was certain that she didn’t deserve an apology in the slightest, but she smiled at Adam, appreciative of his sweet words. “It’s okay. I forgive you.”

            “I forgive you too. I did a long time ago, to be honest.”

            “Well, that’s good then, right?” smiled Elise. “We’ve both moved on… And… And right now I’m feeling something else… Something so big I can barely describe it. I just wanted you to know that… I’ve fallen for you too. Hard and fast and way to strongly. I don’t know what it was. Maybe it was the tension, maybe it was the way you touched me… I can’t tell you. But if I’m being honest… I liked you back in high school. All those times we were kissing, God, it felt like being kissed by someone who loved me. By someone who cared about me. It felt so good to have you that close, and I know it all started off as a bet, and I’m so, so sorry for doing that to you,” Elise said with a heavy sigh. “But God, seeing you again. It brought those feelings back. And I think they were always there. I think… I think deep down I always felt them, I was just in serious denial because I was a stupid high school kid. I just wanted you to know that I care about you. And that I’m glad you came back into my life. And that… And that I love you too.”

            Adam’s hand had been on Elise’s chest the whole time, and she knew that he could feel it: her heart beating faster and her skin getting all warm and flushed. He smiled at her: giving her a sweet, shy one, the kind he would have given her in high school. With his hand on her chest and the other on her chin, he pulled her into a kiss, their tongues gently meeting and their lips moving together softly and both of their hearts beating faster then ever.

            The only reason Elise pulled away was to ask a question. “That means you’re leaving, though. I don’t want you to leave.”

            “That doesn’t mean we can’t still be together. That doesn’t mean I can’t come home to you every night,” he whispered, his fingers running along the skin of her chin. “Trust me when I say that I’m not going anywhere, Elise. If you want to be with me, then God, let’s do it. I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You’re all I want. You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

            Elise could feel tears of happiness welling up in her eyes at that, and her arms quickly wrapped around Adam, wanting him as close as possible. The two held each other tight, letting the morning glow of the sun run along their skins as they embraced one another. Elise’s heart was still thumping in her chest, but it was the good kind. The kind that signalled that everything that had just happened was meant to happen. The kind that told her Adam Bulken was somehow supposed to come back into her life and change it and turn it into something full of pure, unbridled love. She couldn’t have asked for anything better.