MS

One day she woke up and realized she didn't know herself, she lacked the basic knowledge of who she was. She had so much anger and pain but couldn't really pinpoint what her problem was. She knew that something was wrong with her but couldn't really say what it was. She couldn't differentiate between love and hate. She grew up believing that she had to overdo things and always felt the need to over explain in order to be accepted or be loved. She always wanted validation. After all, she was just a beautiful girl needing someone to accept and love her the way she was. She was always shy to speak and couldn't really express herself. There was this fear in her that she couldn't explain and, funny enough, even now in her youth, she still has that fear and still cannot explain. She was different in her beautiful way. She needed someone to understand her. She always wished her Mom would love and understand her better, but her Mom seemed to be the one who mostly misunderstood her. She felt the need to always prove herself to her Mom in order to be loved. I remember one day she went to a school career expo, and she came home to tell her Mom how it was at the career expo. Her Mom told her that the fact that she went to a career expo didn't mean she was intelligent. Finding her identity is more challenging as she has to now face the ghost of yesterday. She has to face the reality, face the trauma and name it like it is. This is the beginning of her self-discovery journey, Journey back to self.