Hidden Among Humans

Chapter 9

I had not realized how much I hated the color gray until now. That was all I saw every day, gray as far as the eye could see. I had always been optimistic, but as the days became longer and longer, it was difficult to be that girl again. It had been a few days since the oncologist cleared me from cancer. Which normally would make anyone happy, but if that wasn't the problem, then what was? My last hopes were placed on a doctor who could not come see me for some time.

I had overheard the nurse earlier today talking about how the doctor's son had been ill as well. Forcing her to take an extended leave from the hospital, only returning for diagnostics of her son. All I could do was continue to stare at the dreary ceiling. I was happy for him, his mother left everything to help him. But I was also saddened when my own parents weren’t there for me.

“Well, you and I will be roomies for some time,” I chuckled as I spoke to every wall around me. Great, maybe I was going crazy as well. I had not been able to leave the room for some time, the doctor had left strict bed rest instructions. I didn’t understand how this bed would make me feel better, I only felt worse as the days went on.

I called the nurse many times before and had failed time and time again. Today, though, I was determined to succeed. Last night I had heard a new nurse would be on the ward. This was my only chance. I waited until the nurse shift changed. I called in the nurse and pleaded for some sunshine or at least a stroll down the hall. Just as I saw a hint of doubt, I attacked with my secret weapon.

“Please, I’m starting to talk to the walls,” I gave her my best puppy eyes. I didn’t resort to this much, but I was desperate to leave the room. I only felt a small amount of shame as I was no longer a child, but it didn’t last long.

“Fine, a short walk,” I smiled, thankful for my success. “I will be right back,” I was not surprised she had returned with a wheelchair.

“I was hoping to take a few steps of my own,” again I brought out my sad puppy eyes.

“Alright, but I'll be right behind you,” her eyes pointed to the wheelchair. Just as I was about to crawl ever so slowly out of the room, I heard my mother say.

“Thank you, nurse, it won't be necessary,” my heart dropped, knowing I was done for.

“But mom, why can’t I…” I began to say, but she interrupted.

“I never said you couldn’t go, allow me,” she said while taking the wheelchair from the nurse.

“She must not be out for long,” the nurse warned.

“After you honey,” she pointed down the hall.

“Thank you,” I mumbled, somewhat relieved. It was strange, my parents had gone from pretending I didn't exist to being there with me every step of the way. I could not help but be suspicious. For now, I will just enjoy my walk.

I had only walked past ten doors before I became too tired to continue. Although the burning sensation in my body had faded long ago, now I just felt weak. It was worse than the first time and still, no one knew why. Mom immediately forced me to sit. I was worried that would be the end of our trip, but rather than returning to the room, she continued to push forwards.

“Let’s look around, what do you say?” I could not believe my ears.

“Yes,” I giggled, knowing the nurse did not want me out of bed for long. Since mom and dad had returned, they had taken their parenting duties seriously. We had made it down three floors before mom spoke.

“Grandpa is coming to visit,” I looked up in disbelief. Grandpa had been sick for much longer than I had and his health had prevented him from traveling. I had spoken to him only once in the last three months. I didn’t want to place worry upon him, so I told him I was doing much better.

“Is he healthy enough to travel?” I questioned.

“Yes and no,” mom winced as she spoke. There was something she was not telling me. I waited for another response but I knew mom wasn't going to say anything further.

“Does dad know?” Grandpa was dad's father. I felt like dad would have opposed his travels in such a state. We had always visited him, although it wasn't as often as I would have liked.

“Yes, he does.” Her tone had changed briefly as if she were annoyed by my question, but I didn’t place too much thought into it. I had my parents, the way they used to be.

“I would love to see him,” I said with uneasiness in my voice. I was worried if it was safe for him to travel, especially in his condition. Grandpa was diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer two years ago. His health had deteriorated since then and, with no cure, we had always gone day by day. He lived in California, so I didn’t get to see him as often, so a part of me was excited to see him.

“Do you want to go outside for a moment,” Mom said, but before I could reply, I heard an unusual heartbeat behind me. My nose also caught a faint odor of cinnamon that accompanied the beating heart.

“I would like to walk for a bit,” I said, trying to pull myself up. Immediately, mom came to assist my struggling body. I slowly turned back to follow the sound. I could hear it clear as day;

Lub..dub…lub…...dub……….lub.dub…………..lub…………… dub……………….lub………..dub………

It continued to slow down as I made my way towards it. Just as I stood ten feet from the door, I heard the heart stop. Just then, the alarms began to ring and everything stood silent for a moment. As all the nurses rushed to the bedside, I just stood there unable to do anything. The sound of his heart-stopping played over and over again. I wasn't sure how long I had been standing there. It could have been seconds, maybe minutes, but to me, it felt like hours. I don’t even remember how I ended up back in the wheelchair.

“It’s best if we go back,” mom said before she rushed away from the area. I didn’t struggle or object much because I couldn’t do anything about it anyway. But just before we had traveled too far, I noticed something.

My nose had caught a whiff of nothing, it was strange, but the cinnamon had been replaced with nothing. It was difficult to explain, but even no smell had an odor. I recalled smelling it before but I could not place it. It was not long before mom had made our way towards my room, where the nurse impatiently awaited.

Of course, I made it to that dreadful bed in one piece. I lay there thinking of the events of that day. Just as I thought the rest of my day would be spent laying down, a nurse walked in.

“Good news, Dr. Villalobos will be here today.” I should have been glad, but if she couldn’t fix me, all the hope I had left would be gone. To be honest, there was little of that left. Just then, the smell of the wild surrounded me. Of course, now being tucked away in bed, I was unable to search for it. “She is one of the best doctors in the field,” the nurse said with a smile.

“We are glad to hear that aren’t we honey,” mom tried to convince me.

“Dr. Villalobos, huh,” I huffed under my breath.

“Did someone say my name?” I looked up to see a woman with an extremely bright smile looking back down at me. She appeared to be only slightly taller than me. She reminded me of a character in a movie I had seen long ago. Her long black slick hair extended past her waist. Her natural tan was the perfect shade of what every girl wanted and her cheekbones were to die for. For some reason, I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was beautiful.

She watched for a moment then turned to speak to my mother about her plan going forward. My eyes followed her every movement. I could not explain it but something about her presence made me feel safe. I continued to watch her, not paying attention to what she said. When it hit me, her smell, the wilderness came from her.

“You smell different,” I whispered under my breath, thinking no one had heard me. It was then that her body posture stiffened and her eyes traveled instantly in my direction. They were different than they had been moments ago. It was as if a wild wolf stared right back at me ready to attack. It was as if, for a moment, I was a threat to her. It was then that I was afraid.

“Shall we begin?” her eyes reverted to their natural state. I looked around to find everyone else looking in a different direction. I was not sure what I had witnessed, but I knew it had been real.