Reclaiming Her Heart

Chapter 5 - Mind Fog

Jadea

The next morning, a knock at my door startled me.

"Yes?" I called out, my voice thick with sleep.

"Daylight is burning, Jadea. It's time to get up," Silas called back.

Sighing heavily, I rolled out of bed. Standing up, I saw a fresh pair of clothes sitting on the dresser. That was odd. I hadn't heard anyone come in. I was normally a light sleeper. Though, the brain fog was still prevalent in my mind. Maybe the toxin was still inhibiting my senses? After changing, I headed toward the heavenly aroma of breakfast. It had to have been days since I'd last eaten anything. I was starving.

At the dining room table, I found Silas and several others already sitting down, eating.

"Ah, there you are," Silas greeted, standing. "Please, take a seat." He waved to a seat next to a younger man who looked almost like Silas. He was either my age or a little older. Once settled with a plate of food and a glass of blood before me, Silas introduced everyone. "This is my mate, Bree. Mateo, my oldest and Malik, my youngest," he nodded to each one. "Everyone, this is Jadea, my niece." We all said polite greetings to each other before an awkward silence settled around us. Thankfully, Silas started making small talk. He roped me in by asking questions about my hunting pack. They weren't versed in the hunting world. Both Mateo and Malik listened intently and asked questions, which made me feel welcomed. It helped put some of the doubts at ease.

I explained how the hunting packs were chosen, and how they put in applications to the High Immortal Council—the council above all Continental Councils. They were screened as a pack to determine what type of immortals they would hunt. And then, it was down to others in the lower councils to assign jobs. Mateo asked about a few of my pack's assignments. All of this information wasn't secret. The hunting packs of the world, while not in an official competition, did hold bragging rights for certain aspects, such as kill count. My pack was the Knight Necromancer's, a pack that was revered and respected among all. We held the highest successful kill rate, and the lowest casualty count. At least that was until Valdis came along... While I couldn't remember the specifics of that hunt, I believed we had dispatched the world of the vile vampire. I just wished I could remember the entire story.

It was so frustrating having such a gaping hole in my memory.

I knew I was forgetting so much important information. Possibly information revolving around Silas and my blood family.

Though, Silas's family seemed normal so far.

While I ate, I studied everyone. Bree was of average height and build. She was sleek and toned. Her brown eyes seeing everything and her intuition caught onto every little nuance. I would have to remember this when it came to any future plans of any kind. I still wasn't sure if I could trust them or not.

Mateo and Malik were both carbon copies of their father. Other than the eye colors. Mateo had his mother's brown eyes while Malik had blue.

"Mateo, I am entrusting Jadea to your capable hands for the day. Please introduce her to the rest of the pack. Ease her into our routine. Show her where the chores list is and answer any questions she may have. Train with her today as well, and take it easy. She's still recovering."

"Yes, father," Mateo said obediently when we were dismissed from the table. The way he looked back at me over his shoulder made me wonder how cooperative he would be.

Surprisingly, he did everything his father asked without creating drama. As he described everyday life, I realized I was already used to this kind of routine. My adoptive father, Lucien, implemented something similar with his pack. This would be an easy transition. When it came to training, though, Mateo was rather rough. I didn't mind it, though. It distracted me. Gave me something to focus on other than the pain lancing through my chest and the confusion clouding my mind. Mateo, at the end of it, was rather impressed and said as much. I wasn't expecting the compliment. "Thanks, you aren't so bad yourself," I replied with a lopsided grin that didn't reach my eyes. It seemed we were on good terms, even if it was tentative.

Over the next couple of weeks, I fell into their routine as I allowed my body to heal. The pack took well to me and I felt like I was on good terms with most of them. I might even go so far as to say Mateo and I were becoming friends. But, maybe that was a bit presumptuous. During the times when I was alone, I tried to stay numb to everything, but it was nearly impossible since my dreams were plagued with stormy blue eyes and a very familiar presence. There was no clean break between my old life and this one. I couldn't escape Adam. And I didn't understand why. Every time I saw his eyes, or felt his essence seep into my dream world, I never felt any animosity. I never felt any type of anger, or hatred. He only ever met me with sadness and longing. With yearning and love.

What was I supposed to make of this?

Did he know who he was connecting with? I doubted it, based on what Silas said. Adam had forcibly taken my pack from me and almost killed me in the process. I was lucky to be alive. If Adam knew it was me he was connecting with, would he hunt me down and finish the job? I didn't want to give him any reason to seek me out, and so I did my best to clear my mind every night. I meditated and it did help. For a while. But, the dreams, and the intimate connection always came back.

That wasn't the only thing plaguing me though. My mind was still in a bit of a fog. A familiar kind of fog. Lucien, when training me for the hunt, trained me on how to identify what toxins or poisons were in my body. I had gone through rigorous training when I decided to follow in his footsteps. When I decided to take up the hunt for turned immortals who killed mortals and immortals alike, Lucien was determined to prepare me for the real-world nightmares I would face. It was what my pack and I had been made for. What we specifically trained for. So, I knew intimately what toxin was still in my system.

My mind remaining in this fog indicated I was still suffering from the effects of demon's blood. It was a great way to keep someone complacent. To keep someone weak. I knew I was being dosed with the toxin. It wasn't a large amount, just enough to keep my mind foggy and make it harder for me to use my inherent powers, but not enough to impair anything else. I just wasn't sure where it was coming from.

When I took my concerns to Silas, his neutral expression gave nothing away. But, I could feel the coldness in the air at the implications my words held.

I prayed he would help me. That he would help figure out what was going on. I hated this feeling and knew I needed a clear head in order to start the process of healing my mind and memories. And I told him as much.

"You're imagining it, Jadea," Silas brushed off. "It must be the remaining effects from the actual injury. The healers did everything they could, but maybe there was too much damage and that's why you're having some residual mind fog." While it was a good assumption, it wasn't good enough for me.

I wanted to ask the healers to come back, to look everything over, and ask my own questions. Before I could request it though, Silas continued on with a bitter coldness in his tone and I knew I upset him. "I can't believe you would bring up such accusations against the family that is actively helping you. Housing you. Feeding you. I could have left you to die after your mate attacked you. I saved you."

I saved you. His words echoed in my mind. The way he said it, the way it hung in the air between us, made me feel as if I should be grateful for his sacrifices. That I should just take this and never ask about it again. To accept my mind may always remain in a fog. That what he did for me was conditional somehow.

He ordered me to bed without supper as a punishment for my callous accusations against him.

Though, I never accused him of anything. I just wanted the fogginess to stop, and I wanted to figure out why it wasn't going away.

When I tried to sleep that night, my mind connected with Adam's again. I woke up, frustrated because I kept connecting with him. I wanted to understand why I couldn't simply stop. I wanted to investigate. To just understand. There was no way I could consciously connect with Adam while my mind was so foggy. So I had to figure out a different way to try and jog my memories. To gain my answers.

Sneaking into Silas's study in the middle of the night, I found the stack of pictures he had shown me tucked into one of his drawers. I slipped one of them out and snuck back to my room where I began to study it. Peering at it as if it held the answers to all of my problems. As if simply gazing at this picture long enough, I would be able to slowly decipher what happened and where it all went wrong.

And maybe find the answer to why I couldn't get him out of my mind. Why our bond wasn't broken, especially if he rejected me.

But, as I stared intently at the picture, no memories came. Only emotions. And those were almost as telling as the memories themselves. There was no fear. No anger. No terror felt when I gazed upon Adam.

Only a deep-seated love and peace was felt.

I wanted to believe Silas, but my gut knew he wasn't being entirely truthful when it came to my relationship with Adam.

Which left me wondering: What exactly happened between my mate, pack and I?